Claim promiscuity is frequently observed in women with AS?

Page 5 of 5 [ 71 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5

Jenna403
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 13 Jul 2014
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 56

08 Aug 2014, 10:42 am

CommanderKeen wrote:
Jenna403 wrote:
Hey there. As a female aspie I feel like I can shed some light on this. In my teens and early 20's I was very promiscuous. That's a nice way of putting it. I ruined many potential relations by being too eager to jump into bed with someone I liked or was attracted to. Why was I like that? I don't really know. I guess it was the easiest way for me to connect with them. I've always enjoyed casual, no strings attached arrangements because I don't need to get caught up in all the emotions of a relationship. Relationship emotions confuse me.

I'm also very blunt when it comes to sex and that has caused a lot of problems. For instance, if I've been dating a guy and I want to sleep with him, I will just say "I want to have sex with you now." Guys tend to not like that very nuch but I just don't like games. I have needs and have no problem taking the initiative to satisfy them. I guess I'm too agressive.

And now I sound like a ho.

I would love to have a woman that blunt. The most I might say if I had a girlfriend that told me "I want to have sex now." I might say, "Okay, just let me eat first."


Ha ha there must always be food first!!

I was seeing this one guy a few years ago. We had gone out about 5 times It was one of those situations where you don't really know if you're dating or just friends. Well, to find out for sure i invited him over to watch movies in my bed. In minutes we were making out and things were getting pretty heated. He remarked that he should move his car if he was going to stay late (my building has strict parking rules). I said "you're welcome to spend the night but if you do we are definitely going to have sex." I said it both flirtatiously and factually. I mean things were VERY heated by that point.

Well, that weirded him out I guess because he left. Later things between us were weird so I asked him what the problem was. He told me that my fowardness scared him. He said he wasn't used to girls being that blunt. That's pretty much where that ended. I didn't really see him again. I didnt see (and still don't see) a problem with what u said.



Ai_Ling
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Nov 2010
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,891

08 Aug 2014, 3:36 pm

I find that claim to be somewhat bizarre. The aspie women I know all supposidly come off as innocent with a lack of sex and dating experiance. Or if they are promiscuous, hide the fact that they are. I dont know what societies standards of promiscuous and I dont know if I would be considered normal or a little promiscous. Most people see me as innocent, I'm rather secretive about my sexuality. I've met guys online mostly or I've been promiscous around close male friends that dont tell anyone. The guys I have sex with, I typically like to close bonds with too. So Im rather abnormal. I guess my "number" is a little higher then your avg women. Altho most women are probably lying and underestimating so thats a tough one.

I dont know if Im promiscuous, I dont care. I know what I am doing, I do my thing.



michael517
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Nov 2013
Age: 60
Gender: Female
Posts: 535
Location: Illinois

08 Aug 2014, 4:13 pm

I have heard of males being concerned if a woman wants to go to bed to quick, the biggest fear is "She just found out she is pregnant with some other guy and wants to trick this guy into thinking he is the daddy".

-- or ---
"This isn't normal, something is going on."

Then again I have known guys that have no problem on the first date, they don't plan on sticking around anyways.



MaxE
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Sep 2013
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,224
Location: Mid-Atlantic US

08 Aug 2014, 11:47 pm

Well in "The Bridge" the Sonya character who is supposed to have AS is portrayed as promiscuous. At least that's how I would interpret the portrayal (although IRL I would never say about a woman that she's promiscuous).

Given that this series supposedly hired "consultants" to advise on AS, I would conclude that said consultants must have advised this behavior as consistent with AS in women. So if it's an unfair characterization, they should take some of the blame.


_________________
My WP story


The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 41
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 32,872
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.

09 Aug 2014, 3:23 am

Well, from the ladies' replies here this claim isn't much untrue after all. Many aspie guys probably wish to be as promoscious but they fail terribly at it and remain virgin or very inexperienced.

Girls have it easier for sex, this is undeniable.



12341234
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 2 Feb 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 71
Location: UK

10 Aug 2014, 9:23 am

zkoc2076 wrote:
So I've been reading various books and sites about Aspergers and I found suprirsing that a lot of literature suggests that females with AS are promiscuous ? (I'm not making it up, names if you want specific names, for example are Isabelle Henault and Tony Attwood)

Surprising not in a judgy way, but rather because how does that fit with difficulties communicating or shyness which are also usually associated with AS?? (Me personally am a spinster)

Would you say that that statement about promiscuity is accurate or is it surprising to you too?

Sorry if that's a too personal question, but then again it's a pretty personal claim to be making about a whole lot of people based on neurology..


Yes - I have noted women, who, as they are unable to acquire friendships in a normal way, are, ultimately prostitutes - I know one that has a conveyor belt of 'visitors' in the hope that a £60 shag will get her a new friend



12341234
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 2 Feb 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 71
Location: UK

10 Aug 2014, 9:24 am

Ai_Ling wrote:
I find that claim to be somewhat bizarre. The aspie women I know all supposidly come off as innocent with a lack of sex and dating experiance. .


But more and more are like this - bordering on the assexual