Claim promiscuity is frequently observed in women with AS?

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11 Jun 2014, 7:25 pm

Seems as if aspies (of both genders) tend to go to extremes in many cases. They either are fully aware of their awkwardness/social disfunction of completely oblivious. Its very possible that seemingly asexual or hyper-sexual aspies have an average sex drive. Its just that the oblivious ones seems hyper-sexual because they are obvious to the taboo aspect of mentioning sex in many situations, and in addition to mentioning it too much, bring it up poorly. On the other side of the same coin, the seemingly asexual ones are afraid that by saying 'so-and-so is hot', or, by getting intimate with someone, or do any flirting or touching they will be labelled a pervert, and just don't see it as worth the label, as they are aware of what being labelled has done to them in the past. Since, as has been mentioned earlier, its less socially acceptable for females to be more sexual, the seemingly hyper sexual females stand out more, as do the seemingly asexual males. They aren't hyper sexual or asexual, they just come across that way.

starvingartist
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11 Jun 2014, 7:36 pm

while i would probably label myself as hypersexual, it's not the same thing as being promiscuous, just wanted to point that out. one can really dig sex and still be selective about whom one chooses to have sex with.

sly279
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11 Jun 2014, 8:56 pm

^

i don't want sex with just anyone. though i connect sex emotionally so it isn't a good idea to go around doing with everyone. so i manage the symptoms.

The_Face_of_Boo
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12 Jun 2014, 12:29 am

Quote:

It's probably just more noticeable in women because, as has been mentioned previously, it's more socially acceptable for men to be super horny/perverted (which might also be why there's that huge stereotype about Autistic males--or Autistic people in general--all being asexual, when really, a lot of us are the opposite). That, in addition to the fact that a lot of Autistic people don't know any better than to talk openly about sex, probably makes it stand out more for women.

And because men are way less picky when it comes to sex.
Even if a lot of aspie men want to be promiscuous, most of them would end up watching porn or masturbating alone every weekend. While for most women, as long they don't have something very repulsive, being promoscious or not is a matter of lifestyle choice.

For aspie men, the best route is seeking for a long term relationship if they want a sex life; a man needs to be overall distinctively hot looking, very social, social-savvy, and easygoing to successively have a promoscious lifestyle.

billiscool
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12 Jun 2014, 1:08 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

but wouldn't a aspie women(or any women)have to be very social
and easy going too? A women still has to be social,able to meet
people too. most promiscuous women are either drunk party
girls or they have tons of male friends,so which would show
they have to be social and have a good personality(or
least get along with guys)

The_Face_of_Boo
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12 Jun 2014, 2:10 am

billiscool wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Not really, if she's not too afraid from meeting guys through the internet. There are plenty of guys on dating sites who just want sex, and there are plenty of hookup sites where guys are way more than women, even if 90% of the guys there are crap, the 10% is still an abundance of options.

rdos
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12 Jun 2014, 2:50 am

FireyInspiration wrote:

Its very possible that seemingly asexual or hyper-sexual aspies have an average sex drive. Its just that the oblivious ones seems hyper-sexual because they are obvious to the taboo aspect of mentioning sex in many situations, and in addition to mentioning it too much, bring it up poorly. On the other side of the same coin, the seemingly asexual ones are afraid that by saying 'so-and-so is hot', or, by getting intimate with someone, or do any flirting or touching they will be labelled a pervert, and just don't see it as worth the label, as they are aware of what being labelled has done to them in the past. Since, as has been mentioned earlier, its less socially acceptable for females to be more sexual, the seemingly hyper sexual females stand out more, as do the seemingly asexual males. They aren't hyper sexual or asexual, they just come across that way.

I have another theory. I think most Aspies that are asexual or hypersexual really have sex as a contact behavior, and thus are more sexually attracted to strangers than people they know. Then the asexual part will just "give up" and identify as asexual to be able to avoid having ordinary sex, while the hyper sexual part will have sex with many different people that they only know superficially. The thing that primarily determines which group they end up in is probably if they like and get something out of ordinary sex or not.

billiscool
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12 Jun 2014, 3:07 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

online sexual hookup and female prostitute are exclude.
(and promiscuous men who mostly or only sleeps with
prostitute are exclude)

lotusblossom
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12 Jun 2014, 6:17 am

SoftwareEngineer wrote:

lotusblossom wrote:

you always make such offensive posts, you seem a real know it all about women, you seem to have a deep core of misogyny always objectifying and dehumanizing women. Do you even see it? Do you have any insight into your posts?

You are just trying to bully me away from my honest observations. First of all, for anyone who checks my list of posts, your maximization of "you always make such offensive posts" is clearly a bogus distortion. Simply because you have an artifically acquired or distorted sense of offense, does not mean I really did anything truly wrong or offensive. Secondly, when my observations took place, I doubt you were anywhere near the place. You are trying to inflate flat land into a mountain.

honestly, it was not intended to bully you, nor do I want you to not speak your mind.

I was just posting my 'gut reaction' to your post, I guess it was just a build up of irritation at your way of talking about women as if you only value them for their sexual worth.

however I do not want to censor you as I very much believe that people have the right to say what they think and would much rather know what people think than have the hide it and them speak disingenuously. Likewise I say what I think in response to them, people have the right to offend and the right to be offended.

SorriorDragneel
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12 Jun 2014, 8:24 am

Tim_Tex wrote:

I have always heard that sex drive for people on the spectrum (both male and female) is usually on one of the extremes (either hypersexual or asexual).

I am on the hypersexual end of things.

I miss being hypersexual..I am borderline asexual these days..But i also have off hormones(my estrogen is higher then tesosterone) sooo if i get that fixed wi will likely be hypersexual again...I really do miss it LOL.

Dillogic
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12 Jun 2014, 8:22 pm

So, ladies... .

A neat and orderly line will do.

The_Face_of_Boo
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13 Jun 2014, 12:31 am

So far, I've counted in my head 8 female users (not all active) who have or had a promoscious lifestyle.

Who_Am_I
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13 Jun 2014, 7:15 pm

Dillogic wrote:

So, ladies... .

A neat and orderly line will do.

No no no. It's meant to be us ladies who are the sluts, not you.

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thirteenboats
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13 Jun 2014, 8:41 pm

Yeah, it was surprising to me too. For me, social anxiety has always gotten in the way of building all types of relationships.

It's funny, though, I have in the past been perceived as hypersexual by others. I have no patience for people who pretend that women have no sex drives or should hide them. And I especially have a hard time tolerating women who see themselves as "ladies in the streets/freaks in the sheets" (heh). At least the ones that are hypocritical about it. People have started rumours about my supposed high sex drive only to be met with further rumors about my social ineptitude. People end up thinking I''m an idiot for "advertising sex" when I have so little experience when in reality no such thing actually happened. I have opinions about social norms, it doesn't mean that I habitually break them. I'm not even that open about controversial opinions, it's just hard for me to hide my impatience when people say certain things.

The_Face_of_Boo
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14 Jun 2014, 1:36 pm

Who_Am_I wrote:

Dillogic wrote:

So, ladies... .

A neat and orderly line will do.

No no no. It's meant to be us ladies who are the sluts, not you.

You would offend some female users with this line.

KindOf
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14 Jun 2014, 2:24 pm

Now, now, you're all little sluts.

*dons fetish gear and cracks whip*

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