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RichardBrooks
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Joined: 3 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 7
Location: Tennessee

04 Jul 2014, 5:55 pm

alex913 wrote:
I am not seeking a diagnosis because I'm currently severely impaired, no. You're right in that respect. But the reason I'm not "impaired" is that I'm using a lot of coping mechanisms to navigate daily life. I guess the fact that I have to use those coping mechanisms in the first place would be considered an impairment by some...

... I have learned to cope with a lot of these things, but the "symptoms" are still there. I guess a better way of putting it is that instead of letting them impair me, I try to work around it as much as I can. But this can indeed be draining and exhausting a lot of the time...

... I was always made to feel like there was something really screwed up about me, and so I learned to act and copy empathic people to respond the way I'm expected to.

... I know my symptoms get exacerbated by stress and I have sought professional help when that happened and it could have had detrimental effects on my life.


I was diagnosed only 6 months ago at age 35. The suspicion had been there for a while, but having the official diagnosis was, for me, quite a relief because I had confirmation that I was not the sociopath, the robot, or the a**hole I had been accused of being all my life. Also, learning about ASD was like reading my life story and having it make sense for the first time. So, yeah, it was comforting having a label to put on what was so different about me compared to my peers and family. But there has been more to it. As far as the coping goes, I, like you, found coping mechanisms throughout adolescence and early adulthood that allowed me to start a successful business and lead a (limited, mind you) social life. But after the diagnosis, I learned how my coping strategies were only barely adequate. The new strategies I've learned and am learning have really opened my world up as well as brought me more relief than I had thought possible. For instance, what I once thought were panic attacks I now recognize as 'meltdowns', and know how to avoid those and cope with them properly when they happen. Yes, the treatment I had sought out for anxiety helped, but only so much. Also, there are vast resources (books, Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy, blogs, etc.) that have furthered my ability to communicate with the 'neurotypical' people in my life, be more comfortable doing so, and know how to tastefully withdraw myself before I reach my limit for socialization. Not only were many of the coping strategies I had developed before my diagnosis less than optional, most of them were unnecessary. My diagnosis gave me permission to be different, or at least allowed me to accept it. I no more have to struggle to be like everyone else than a diabetic has to struggle to not be diabetic; manage my stress and sensitivity levels, yes; but be normal... well, 'normal' is a spectrum, too.