I need some dating advice from women

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Ann2011
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18 Jul 2014, 7:21 am

vickygleitz wrote:
Ann, I hope you do not think I am referring to you.

Oh, okay, never mind.



vickygleitz
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18 Jul 2014, 11:31 pm

I think if you have to point out what needs need attending to and are forced to ask, then the relationship will probably fail. In a good relationship the partners know each other's needs intuitively. This is why they are good partners.[/quote]

I have a great partner who is not even remotely psychic.



wozeree
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19 Jul 2014, 12:47 am

Oh dear lord, I think you have it backwards - it's probably actually true that more relationships fail because one partner is tragically disappointed when the other one isn't psychic and their feelings become damaged beyond repair. I've seen this happen repeatedly! It's usually the woman, not sure why so many women are so dumb as to literally expect that - listen to Vicky, she has sense!



Ann2011
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19 Jul 2014, 6:05 am

vickygleitz wrote:
Ann2011 wrote:
I think if you have to point out what needs need attending to and are forced to ask, then the relationship will probably fail. In a good relationship the partners know each other's needs intuitively. This is why they are good partners.


I have a great partner who is not even remotely psychic.


wozeree wrote:
Oh dear lord, I think you have it backwards - it's probably actually true that more relationships fail because one partner is tragically disappointed when the other one isn't psychic and their feelings become damaged beyond repair. I've seen this happen repeatedly! It's usually the woman, not sure why so many women are so dumb as to literally expect that - listen to Vicky, she has sense!


I'm not talking about psychic ability or magic and don't call me dumb.

Some things are pretty clear if you pay attention, empathize and are aware of the temperment of your partner. Obviously some things have to be spoken as the partner has no way to know, but not always. It just seems like such a burden to have to explain myself all the time. But I'm not great relationship material, this is probably one of the reasons.



businezguy
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19 Jul 2014, 7:35 am

So today is date night #1, and the second date with the lady who is the basis of this thread. I'm a bit nervous, but at least I took as many steps as I felt I could to make an impression. I've been going to the gym 6 days a week, and unlike the past I've been systematically lifting for each area of my body twice a week i.e. shoulders, arms, chest, etc. I can't complain with the results either, as usual with weights and protein muscle clings to me like fish to water. So I actually have arms almost as big as some of the guys who have been lifting for a couple of years (although I still push less weight than they do).

But even with my neatly trimmed beard, the clothes I've picked out, the loss of body fat, the considerable gain in muscle, etc. I still feel really nervous. I wish I could be in a more relaxed stage of a relationship. I do well at that point. Climbing the early dating hurdles is just so difficult.

So it helps to be on here, and let off some steam. See? Even when I'm not driving a lady crazy with text messages, I'm still going to drive you all crazy. :P



The_Face_of_Boo
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19 Jul 2014, 7:47 am

^^^ Araaaaarrrrhhaaaaauhhh shut up!! ! Get out of my damn screen!! !


and oh, good luck.



vickygleitz
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19 Jul 2014, 12:41 pm

Ann2011 wrote:
vickygleitz wrote:
Ann2011 wrote:
I think if you have to point out what needs need attending to and are forced to ask, then the relationship will probably fail. In a good relationship the partners know each other's needs intuitively. This is why they are good partners.


I have a great partner who is not even remotely psychic.


wozeree wrote:
Oh dear lord, I think you have it backwards - it's probably actually true that more relationships fail because one partner is tragically disappointed when the other one isn't psychic and their feelings become damaged beyond repair. I've seen this happen repeatedly! It's usually the woman, not sure why so many women are so dumb as to literally expect that - listen to Vicky, she has sense!


I'm not talking about psychic ability or magic and don't call me dumb.

Some things are pretty clear if you pay attention, empathize and are aware of the temperment of your partner. Obviously some things have to be spoken as the partner has no way to know, but not always. It just seems like such a burden to have to explain myself all the time. But I'm not great relationship material, this is probably one of the reasons.


okay, my dear. We had better sit down and talk. I see [hell, I FEEL] your compassion and loving heart. I sense that you have been a fighter all your life. Don't give up now! And you ARE relationship material. You care. You are smart. You love. You are good at certain things men love. You have worked most of your life, but going through some Autistic burnout right now, I wish you and Skibum and Wowzerree and a few others of us were in the same area, We would have such fun together. And we'd create some extraordinary careers and change the perception people have of autistics. And find you that dream relationship. I AM so angry at whoever made you feel that you ae not relationship material.



wozeree
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19 Jul 2014, 12:49 pm

Ann2011 wrote:
vickygleitz wrote:
Ann2011 wrote:
I think if you have to point out what needs need attending to and are forced to ask, then the relationship will probably fail. In a good relationship the partners know each other's needs intuitively. This is why they are good partners.


I have a great partner who is not even remotely psychic.


wozeree wrote:
Oh dear lord, I think you have it backwards - it's probably actually true that more relationships fail because one partner is tragically disappointed when the other one isn't psychic and their feelings become damaged beyond repair. I've seen this happen repeatedly! It's usually the woman, not sure why so many women are so dumb as to literally expect that - listen to Vicky, she has sense!


I'm not talking about psychic ability or magic and don't call me dumb.

Some things are pretty clear if you pay attention, empathize and are aware of the temperment of your partner. Obviously some things have to be spoken as the partner has no way to know, but not always. It just seems like such a burden to have to explain myself all the time. But I'm not great relationship material, this is probably one of the reasons.


Hi Ann, sorry, I wasn't calling you dumb! I wasn't really even calling the women I've seen doing it dumb. I just meant that I have seen some women get angry and very hurt because men didn't intuitively know things that they could not have intuitively known - they're not dumb, just sometimes doing dumb things. (Sorry, I just phrased it badly, I would never call you dumb! :D)



Ann2011
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19 Jul 2014, 2:33 pm

vickygleitz wrote:
okay, my dear. We had better sit down and talk. I see [hell, I FEEL] your compassion and loving heart. I sense that you have been a fighter all your life. Don't give up now! And you ARE relationship material. You care. You are smart. You love. You are good at certain things men love. You have worked most of your life, but going through some Autistic burnout right now, I wish you and Skibum and Wowzerree and a few others of us were in the same area, We would have such fun together. And we'd create some extraordinary careers and change the perception people have of autistics. And find you that dream relationship. I AM so angry at whoever made you feel that you ae not relationship material.


I'm not giving up. Thanks, Vicky. :D

wozeree wrote:
Hi Ann, sorry, I wasn't calling you dumb! I wasn't really even calling the women I've seen doing it dumb. I just meant that I have seen some women get angry and very hurt because men didn't intuitively know things that they could not have intuitively known - they're not dumb, just sometimes doing dumb things. (Sorry, I just phrased it badly, I would never call you dumb! :D)


No worries. I know this is sexist, but I've often found that women are more intuitively aware of the needs of others. I know I have been frustrated by mens' unawareness at times.