My boyfriend is really mad at me because I let him down...

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My boyfriend lives an hour away. I got a message from him this morning about him being in a lot of pain. I said I could come bring him pain medicine and stay there for a couple of days. The problem is, I packed up and showered and was ready to go in maybe 30 or so minutes but then I needed gas and to run by the store real quick for a travel size bottle or else my face wash would spill everywhere because the bottle broke. I told him and he said a bit later in text that if I was going to take a long time, I shouldn't come. I said it should only take 20-30 min to run in and out (but I was wrong... I don't know why I thought that at all. I am used to living closer to the store but I moved a month and a half or so ago farther away). He said he needed to leave for work soon and he had expected me to already be almost there. I took that to mean that I couldn't come because he needed to go to work. So, I was already walking into the store at this point and I figured I might as well pick up a couple of other things since I couldn't go and I was already at the store.

Come to find out, he hadn't meant that I couldn't come. Having taken longer at the store than I would have had I realized that I could still go, I was finally ready to go an hour and 45 min after I said I could come help him. Now he is really mad at me and says I let him down when he needed my help. So I'm not going.

I feel so bad. I hadn't realized how much time was passing at all and I thought the store would be super fast. I really thought he meant I shouldn't come by him saying I shouldn't come if I was going to take a long time because he was leaving for work soon and thought I would already be close. He says I let him down when he needed me. It just makes me feel horrible. I don't want to let him down. I just didn't plan well at all and I misunderstood him. I had no idea how much time was passing.

I am really bad at understanding hypothetical speech. Sometimes people use it and it really is a hypothetical and sometimes people use it and mean what they are saying and I don't know how to tell the difference. He and I have this problem all the time. I wish he just wouldn't use hypothetical speech with me. I am also really bad at planning things out as I am doing them. I need time to plan out my steps right.

And I just want him to know I care and really wanted to be there. He seems to think I don't care or else I would have left faster and being let down by the people close to him isn't something he is very forgiving of.

This sucks.

It sounds to me like it was just a mis-communication, on both of your parts. I don't think that you did anything wrong, it sounds like you were just confused by what he was saying.

^ that plus if he is not like this all the time (calling you out on things you did wrong and making you feel like dirt) it could be that the pain he was in got him really grouchy.

Honestly best thing you can do is text him what you posted here (its perfectly understandable) and wait to see what he replies.

I'm sorry to say this, but your boyfriend sounds really ungrateful. The facts that you were willing to drop whatever plans you had for that day and the following days and drive an hour to see him should be appreciated. I understand that he was in pain, wanted you to be there, and the whole miscommunication, but he should at least acknowledge your willingness to go and be there for him.