Do Aspies obsess about being normal?

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When I was younger, I never could figure out why my peers almost always rejected me. Now I realize that my actions were not the same as theirs. Now that I am in my 20's (and attending college with students much younger than myself), I am fitting in much better. However, I have not wanted to "be normal" or whatever since I was in high school. Now, I don't seek to be in the popular crowd. I am nice to everyone and if people want to hang with me, then that's cool. I guess I would be considered an acquaintance to most of the people in my life. I still can't figure out how to get past that barrier and "connect" with people on topics not skin deep, but oh well.

I think there are aspies that fantasize about being an NT stereotype....someone who's a huge success socially and financially etc. A "winner". Probably not many aspies want to be a lot of the NT's I know online who have a very difficult time struggling with life.

I don't want to fit in. I think like everyone else I want who I am to be appreciated, without the fronts and acts people expect.

I'm the opposite. I like to cherish and celebrate my differences. My AS is what makes me unique. I wouldn't give that up for the world.

I don't think of it.

Yeah.
Until I was 15, I obsessed about not fitting in. After 15, I made it a virtue being different.
(Not that it was great fun).
Now I obsess over my past like you, but some day it will pass, I´m sure.

This. NT normal is fakey, hypocrisy, shallow and an act to get what you want in my eyes.

I might be blunt and even inconsiderate at times, but it's the real me. Not some mask that I've put on or act to impress you or game to manipulate you into doing what I want.

I'd like to be treated the way I'm trying to be: like a good person who just wants to do what's right and express truth from my own unique perspective.

Why that comes across as threatening, controlling and disrespectful I simply do not understand. I try to give other people the benefit of the doubt, and assume that they are speaking truth and trying to do the right thing. I get very confused and often hurt when I find out that they were lying to take advantage of people or making up cr@p to get ahead or acting in a certain way to manipulate me or others into serving their interests. Why can't people just tell the truth and be kind to one another?

I never really wanted to be normal & never wanted to fit in. I mostly wanted to be left alone instead.