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Deb1970
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04 Oct 2014, 1:23 pm

BeggingTurtle wrote:
I know I shouldn't be doing it.

I take my pocket knife, and slowly saw into my wrist until it bleeds. Both wrists have marks on them now and I keep doing it every day. It's been this way since I broke up with my girlfriend. I want to to stop, but I need solutions for it first.


Have you tried putting a rubber band around your wrist and snapping it. Cutting yourself will cause scars that will never go away.


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greengirl27
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06 Oct 2014, 3:04 pm

I have problems with self harming (cutting). In fact it was indirectly this that led to my diagnosis. I started cutting after developing PTSD symptoms. It got so bad that I was placed in a year long treatment programme after having been diagnosed with BPD which never seemd to fit. It was whilst there that I was re-diagnosed.

The cutting is better nowadays. I have had some episodes since discharge but am definitely more able to control it. I still struggle with other behaviours when I'm having a meltdown such as banging my head, hitting my head, whacking myself with objects, hitting/kicking walls, trees etc but these behaviours have been there since childhood so they're a lot more ingrained.



slave
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06 Oct 2014, 6:12 pm

BeggingTurtle wrote:
I know I shouldn't be doing it.

I take my pocket knife, and slowly saw into my wrist until it bleeds. Both wrists have marks on them now and I keep doing it every day. It's been this way since I broke up with my girlfriend. I want to to stop, but I need solutions for it first.


Some engage in NSSH because their emotional pain is too intense for them to face and it is therefore blocked.
If you can connect with and express the emotional pain you may be suppressing, the urge will likely stop.

Will you consider professional help?



Charloz
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07 Oct 2014, 1:06 am

BeggingTurtle wrote:
I take my pocket knife, and slowly saw into my wrist until it bleeds. Both wrists have marks on them now and I keep doing it every day. It's been this way since I broke up with my girlfriend. I want to to stop, but I need solutions for it first.


There is no solution but the power of your own mind. The fact that you cut your wrists hints at a depression, and possible suicidal tendencies. It's like you somehow want attention, and play-pretend at suicide. At the same time you may like the pain, or even be addicted to it. To inflict damage onto yourself in a way that is clearly visible.

You have a mental problem, and it is severe. You need to get professional help and people on the internet cannot possibly be expected to help you with it. Seek help, please. This really is the best I can do, I'm afraid.


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Evil_Chuck
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08 Oct 2014, 6:03 am

I've never done self-harm, nor do I get any satisfaction from physical pain. Plus I don't have to remind myself that I'm alive. I am all too conscious of that unfortunate fact. I deal with my pain by listening to music or distracting myself somehow.

I think I understand why some people do it, but I've never gone down that road myself.


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scribbler99
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10 Oct 2014, 12:57 pm

What " I am the Catalyst" says does make a lot of sense to me. Cutting is not anything that I'm ashamed of, it satisfies a need that I cant explain but just know that I need to do. I dont so it much and I have never done myself serious damage with it, but the need feels real and makes sense.



RedStar98
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10 Oct 2014, 2:19 pm

I used to do it a lot two years ago- i did my best to make it look accidental (not putting two straight cuts next to each to each other etc. and i kept it hidden) and i've never really been 'addicted' to it as such, its just something i do sometimes. i did it a bit harder than usual last night in a slightly too obvious place which i do kind of regret but i was tired and not really thinking straight. i don't think its anything to be ashamed of



AdamK
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10 Oct 2014, 3:04 pm

Well, you have a lot of help here. I can tell you what the therapist who helped me, and was an expert in self-harm, told me. She also knew someone in her family who did it, so she knew what she was talking about. It seems to work, for me at least. The best alternative for me was to draw my self cutting myself instead of actually doing it. She said that you shouldn't stop because someone else tells you to. That will just make you do it more, because they're putting pressure on you. You will cut more because of the pressure you feel. If you're really ready to quit then you just have to quit. There's no other way around it, but don't do it till you're ready. Till then try to delay the time when you do it for as long as possible. Only do it just before you go to bed if you can. That way at least you'll be ready for the pressure when you do decide to quit perminently. Also, if you've been doing it every day, the first night after you decide to quit will be hard. That first night of not doingt it almost made me start again. So make sure you're with someone who you can talk to during the first night, if possible, even if it's at 2 am. That's when the withdrawl (which you will probabley have) happened to me. I assume you are careful to not accidently hit an artery, but you might want to have some medical supplies in your house just in case. You don't want to get an infection. Anyway, that's the best I can do. At least you're not taking drugs or something like that (I hope.)



naturalplastic
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11 Oct 2014, 5:06 pm

I have struggled for the decades since I was 12 with a peccadillo that is a lot like cutting.

At that age I got the notion that my nose should be shaped differently to look better, and began pulling on it. It caused all kinds of physical pain, but no improvement in my looks. But the pain itsself became addicttive. The urge would become especially strong when angry, or emotionally stressed.

One trick I found to help stop it is to recognize that you crave pain, but to put pain into a part of your body where it does good instead of harm.

Pain in you arm muscles (biceps, triceps) is good because it means that you're buffing up the muscle. So I will do isometrics (pumping iron without iron-via pulling your arms with your arms ala Charles Atlas) to siphon off the urge to pull on my nose.

You also might consider a counter-obsession. Maybe get an excercise bike. If you get the urge to cut-get on the bike and peddle a mile. Get the urge again- peddle another mile. That might cause you to cut at lessened frequency, and cause you to get aerobics in.



BeggingTurtle
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11 Oct 2014, 9:50 pm

scribbler99 wrote:
What " I am the Catalyst" says does make a lot of sense to me. Cutting is not anything that I'm ashamed of, it satisfies a need that I cant explain but just know that I need to do. I dont so it much and I have never done myself serious damage with it, but the need feels real and makes sense.


I'm coming to accept that now.


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886
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12 Oct 2014, 6:14 am

I don't know what you hope to accomplish from it, but I cut for 6 months when I was 16/17. I'm 24 now and haven't entirely been suicidal for a long time, but I can tell you I have to wear long sleeves every day of my life, even when it's 115 degrees out, and I can never be confident around other people, especially women, knowing I have scars that can't really be explained. It was a terrible decision, cutting provided me no benefit and I'd do just about anything to reverse it.

I know how it feels to be hopeless, but you should really think long term here, and even short term, is it really productive? Is it going to solve anything? Do you honestly feel as if it's something you "have" to do, or is it just something you say to yourself to justify doing it? You ought to seek help before you do any more irreversible damage. :?


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naturalplastic
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12 Oct 2014, 11:13 am

Maybe I dont get it.

There is cutting- like on your upper arm - because you get a thrill out of pain.

Then there is cutting -on your wrist- which is flirting with suicide ( like skydiving might be for some folks).


Might be two different syndromes.

The OP seems to be into the latter.



AdamK
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13 Oct 2014, 7:26 am

886 wrote:
I don't know what you hope to accomplish from it, but I cut for 6 months when I was 16/17. I'm 24 now and haven't entirely been suicidal for a long time, but I can tell you I have to wear long sleeves every day of my life, even when it's 115 degrees out, and I can never be confident around other people, especially women, knowing I have scars that can't really be explained. It was a terrible decision, cutting provided me no benefit and I'd do just about anything to reverse it.

I know how it feels to be hopeless, but you should really think long term here, and even short term, is it really productive? Is it going to solve anything? Do you honestly feel as if it's something you "have" to do, or is it just something you say to yourself to justify doing it? You ought to seek help before you do any more irreversible damage. :?


Of course it's not productive. It's not supposed to be. How is guilting him (or her?) going to make him stop? I'm not saying you're experiance and emotions are less real than his, but did other people telling you to stop help you? I've also found that nobody notices my scars. In fact it annoys me more that nobody notices than it would if somebody did. Makes me see how much people don't care about others. Maybe thinking you need to wear long sleeves is pyscosimatic?



androbot01
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13 Oct 2014, 7:51 am

I've gone a couple of months without cutting. I started when I was 13. My upper arms are too scarred to expose, but below my elbows isn't too bad.
My reason for cutting is fairly simple - I don't like myself very much. When I cut it's almost like I am trying to distance myself from myself. I get incredibly angry and frustrated and am almost raging against myself.
I regret my scars every day, but when that anger is inside me I just don't care.
I have to agree with some previous posters that professional counselling is probably in order. You don't cut yourself because everything's dandy - talk to your doctor.