Stealing and lying during med changes.

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Eliasandjonasmom
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03 Nov 2014, 12:41 pm

How to I explain to my 13 yr old aspie son, that if your caught in the act of doing something wrong, or making a bad choice, that it's important to admit your mistake and feel/show some regret in a bad choice and apologize. And that will lead to you feeling better about yourself and grow too. He was caught on video stealing at the school book fair, and the principle said they watched the video together and he still was trying to deny it for awhile afterwards. He usually doesn't steal, its very out of character for him. He is between med changes, which I know played apart in his decision making due to anxiety about just asking us for some money to spend, and impulsiveness. It's still no excuse I know he knows it's wrong, just being on the right meds would have played a part in helping him calmly do the right thing, which we are in the process of working on. I know it boils down to him choosing to do the right thing but since this happened during the time were tweaking his meds, I have to address the issue and try to make a learning experience out of it now. Even with him being off track. The school says he can bring the stuff back tomorrow, write an apology letter to the pto, and he got a four point infraction. I'm going to have him work on some extra chores around the house and no tv for a week as punishment too, along with a talk with him and his dad about values and doing the right thing too. Am I over thinking this? I hope I'm covering all the bases here. Is stealing and lying when your caught common with aspies? I will try in the near future to provide more opportunities to help out with chores and such so he gets paid a little more often, and has a little more of his own spending cash.



Eliasandjonasmom
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03 Nov 2014, 12:52 pm

I should mention he has ADHD too, which I'm sure is where the impulsiveness is stemming from. He is unable to take stimulants but takes Guanfacine for focus. We might switch that to a different med too his dr said, but first and foremost we are dealing with the anxiety med, as that's his definite bigger issue at hand. One thing at a time though. He is transitioning currently from risperidone to abilify over the coarse of the last month and the next week and a half or so. Fingers are crossed.



AspieUtah
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03 Nov 2014, 1:13 pm

So many reasons, it seems. Being 13 years old and wishing you could have what other people have might have provoked it. Yes, it might also be the medications. Or, maybe it is just plain old acting out.

I don't know if this kind of behavior is common among Aspies of his age (or any age). For me, at least, I would vote with a jury to convict me if I ever did something that I consider to be immoral or unethical. It is simply that important to me. I don't tell others that they should follow my morality, but it bothers me when anyone exhibits a double-standard kind of morality ("I steal from others, but don't want to have things stolen from me").

Unfortunately, it is behavior that, left uncorrected, can quickly escalate to a consuming level. Good luck in any case.


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Diagnosed in 2015 with ASD Level 1 by the University of Utah Health Care Autism Spectrum Disorder Clinic using the ADOS-2 Module 4 assessment instrument [11/30] -- Screened in 2014 with ASD by using the University of Cambridge Autism Research Centre AQ (Adult) [43/50]; EQ-60 for adults [11/80]; FQ [43/135]; SQ (Adult) [130/150] self-reported screening inventories -- Assessed since 1978 with an estimated IQ [≈145] by several clinicians -- Contact on WrongPlanet.net by private message (PM)