I gave up on girls when I was 13.

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Joined: 14 Apr 2013
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06 Dec 2014, 12:16 pm

It surely will. It’s a matter of time :lol:

Many people, if not most, aren’t even allowed to date at 13. If they gave up at that age, they’d never try!

izzeme wrote:

small penis/virgin/never kissed
not visible on the outside, they won't know untill you tell them.
the alternative is that they notice, but at that point they have already accepted them, and "teaching" a boy is something which girls like to do

I have a hard time believing virginity and having never been kissed are always invisible, especially in someone with low self-esteem. I’m sure most women can tell it from a mile away.

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Jjancee
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06 Dec 2014, 5:09 pm

Spiderpig wrote:

It surely will. It’s a matter of time :lol:

Many people, if not most, aren’t even allowed to date at 13. If they gave up at that age, they’d never try!

izzeme wrote:

I have a hard time believing virginity and having never been kissed are always invisible, especially in someone with low self-esteem. I’m sure most women can tell it from a mile away.

Yes, yes, people can. Radiating desperation and self-loathing tends to repel others.

sly279
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07 Dec 2014, 7:30 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:

Your body will never allow you to give up.

how so?

catalina
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07 Dec 2014, 8:47 pm

here is an example i found in google about ugly men with pretty women (I dont think all the men in the link are that ugly).
I think beauty is subjective, i may consider attractive a man whom other women would consider ugly.

http://www.foxnews.com/slideshow/entert ... /#slide=14

sly279
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07 Dec 2014, 10:36 pm

most of those guys aren't really ugly. only a few are. they just aren't super models.

kraftiekortie
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08 Dec 2014, 10:49 am

Whatever "sexuality" one is, your body will want a communion with another person which is physical. Perhaps sensory difficulties might cause one to reject the notion--but I would bet that the DESIRE is there.

sly279
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09 Dec 2014, 3:06 am

kraftiekortie wrote:

you meen sexually? thats what mastubation is for.

white_as_snow
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09 Dec 2014, 6:24 pm

slenkar wrote:

Would you like to post a picture on here?, you might not even be ugly.

My own sister told me I was a loser from age 11 to 21, luckily I didnt listen, I knew she had issues.
The lower class girls at school told me I was a loser, this was difficult to take too.
My older brother criticised me my whole childhood, my 'friends' from school criticised every facet of my introverted personality.

No, I will not post a picture. Trust me, im ugly.

white_as_snow
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09 Dec 2014, 6:28 pm

alex wrote:

white_as_snow wrote:

Nothing to do with my look and experience? Im extremly ugly and I have a hard time beliving that women dont care about experience.

Quote:

Its not exactly normal to be 23 years old and virgin.

How would they know? If you don't tell them, how would they figure that out? It's not rocket science. If you don't know how to do it, look it up.

Quote:

Is it really "bad" self-esteem if im actully right?

Lol, if you think you're attractive, you're right. If you think the opposite you're also right because that's your personal opinion of yourself. everyone's opinion is subjective so the only opinion that matters is your own. So just change your opinion of yourself.

Quote:

If it is wrong, why have so many people told me that im a ugly loser?

Probably because they pick up on how you view yourself.

Quote:

Indeed there is many ugly/poor people that have a relationship. But there is so many negative things about me so its silly. Why should I even try when I know what the result will be like?

If you truly can see into the future, that alone makes you intriguing most likely. Otherwise, I don't see why you would know what the result is going to be like when the result will be different with different people. If you don't approach enough people you won't find the one that's going to be into the idea of dating you.

If a guy is nervous and bad in the bed she will know. And she might ask. I dont want to lie. Yes, I can read about sex and watch porn movies, but its still not the same thing as actully doing it. And im a very stressed person.

Yes, it is subjective. But I have so many weakness so no girl can find me attractive, im 100 % sure.

All other guys are so much better than me and the girls know it. They are not stupied. Why would a girl want me when she can have someone who is better? I dont belive in this "love" thing etc. It just all about looks, status, confidence.

white_as_snow
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09 Dec 2014, 6:37 pm

izzeme wrote:

your attitude is the biggest problem.
the rest ar hurdles, sure, but not impossible to overcome.

red lips
can be an asset really, many women like a bit of femininity in men

small body
just like many women, towering over the majority isn't a large advantage either

small penis/virgin/never kissed
not visible on the outside, they won't know untill you tell them.
the alternative is that they notice, but at that point they have already accepted them, and "teaching" a boy is something which girls like to do

ugly
an opinion, nothing more.

dont get me wrong, i felt the same for 26 years (except for the short bit; i'm actually giant, which has simular problems), but i managed to get a GF, which fixed all of these

I does not matter even if I hade the best attitude in the world. I have to many defects that scares girls away.

Red lips not a problem? I have heard and read so many times know about red lips on guys is gay, does not fit, would never date a guy that have very red lips etc.

No women like a bit of femininity in men, the want a man to be a man.

Regarding small body, well yes many women have small body, but im not a women, Im a man and should have larger body.

Regarding my penis, when they see it, they will dump me. Small penis gives no pleasure.

"Teaching" a boy? Its simple not true that womens like that. They want a real man. A man that is experienced. Not a virgin boy like me.

Opinion? I have never got a complimang about my looks, only negative stuff.

white_as_snow
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09 Dec 2014, 6:40 pm

Xanthic~Rain wrote:

but if it can happen to me, it can happen to anyone.

Not for me. Im one of the most unattractive male on earth. I have nothing to offer and can not fix it. Its hopless.

I dont want advice how to find a women, becuse it wont work. I want advice how to accept being lonly my entire life.

white_as_snow
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09 Dec 2014, 6:43 pm

catalina wrote:

He is not ugly.

If you ever saw me in real life, you will understand why I have so low "self-esteem".

em_tsuj
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10 Dec 2014, 11:24 pm

I don't think you can accept the idea of being alone all your life unless you CHOOSE to be alone. Your attitude is that you are FORCED to be alone due to circumstances beyond your control. How can someone (especially a person in their early 20's with a sex drive) accept 50-60 more years of involuntary abstinence.

I will tell you that I had the same beliefs as you (that I would always be alone). Now that I am older and have more experience interacting with women, I know that it is improbable that I will always be alone. I see women who are attracted to me and I have confidence that I will be able to figure out how to get into a relationship. It has taken a long time. It also took me moving to a place where I can be accepted. My hometown is a place where I would never have met a partner.

How about keeping an open mind? Things change. You change.

Cafeaulait
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11 Dec 2014, 10:54 am

em_tsuj wrote:

Clearly I am working on it but I am starting to progess into the right direction as well. I am a very good looking girl who is sweet, attentive, quircky, intelligent and caring. Those are all good traits. If I would also feel more confident and worry less so that I could me more fun and energetic, I think it will be just find. It would just be crazy if I remained single for another decade (or even a half) because I see so many different people in relationships, most of them not as intelligent, caring or well groomed as I am.
Yesterday I went on a date with a guy. I was really nervous and all kind of thoughts went to my mind: maybe I was not cool enough for him, maybe he there was gonna be no connection, maybe he is gonna think I am really weird or strange, etc etc etc. And then I went on the date with this guy and he said he really, really liked me. He liked my quirkyness, he liked the fact that I liked things about myself. I also really liked him. At the end of the night I was like: woooow, so I CAN actually meet a guy who is both hot and I feel chemistry with CAN be mutual. Obviously I have no clue where it will be going for here, but even if he won't call me for a second date, at least I know that I can find guys that like my quirkyness (especially when I am confident about it).

Slowly, very slowly, by exposure and behavioural activation, my schemas about myself are starting to change. I might not actually be too weird or not talkative enough for someone to fall in love with me and want to date me.

em_tsuj
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12 Dec 2014, 11:30 pm

Cafeaulait wrote:

Yesterday I went on a date with a guy. I was really nervous and all kind of thoughts went to my mind: maybe I was not cool enough for him, maybe he there was gonna be no connection, maybe he is gonna think I am really weird or strange, etc etc etc. And then I went on the date with this guy and he said he really, really liked me. He liked my quirkyness, he liked the fact that I liked things about myself. I also really liked him. At the end of the night I was like: woooow, so I CAN actually meet a guy who is both hot and I feel chemistry with CAN be mutual. Obviously I have no clue where it will be going for here, but even if he won't call me for a second date, at least I know that I can find guys that like my quirkyness (especially when I am confident about it).

Slowly, very slowly, by exposure and behavioural activation, my schemas about myself are starting to change. I might not actually be too weird or not talkative enough for someone to fall in love with me and want to date me.

Great news! I am happy for you.

Cafeaulait
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13 Dec 2014, 7:43 am

Thanks. Clearly I will have to see how it goes with this guy and we have only been one date so it doesn't mean anything. But it's a boost to my self esteem and turns out the guy was bullied for being 'weird' in primary school. How ironic is that

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