UK parent of a 14yo boy going through Asperger's diagnosis

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Hi,

I'm the Dad of a 14 year-old boy who has been referred to CAMHS for a diagnosis. It all started a year ago when we were on holiday and an education specialist talked to us and suggested he needed a diagnosis. I went away to read about Asperger's on here and found it described my son exactly.

We'd always thought of our son as just being 'him' - quiet, struggling socially, physically awkward and extremely interested in a particular hobby. He never showed any emotions and didn't understand humour. Apart from the odd outburst he was just quiet, studious but lonely.

Having had an episode at home I printed off the list of character traits, having first removed any names/titles. He ticked the lot!

We went to the GP, discussed it with him and he sent a referral to CAMHS - who sent it straight back saying they needed an educational psychologist referral and wouldn't acccept his. To say he wasn't happy was an understatement; he's a senior GP who is nationally respected!

However ... to the school we went. My son's at a selective grammar in West Yorkshire who were initially hesitant but since then have been great. He had an educational psychologist assessment in July, which the school wanted to do then to cover his GCSE's. The Asperger's diagnosis result has helped the school and him. Then we were back through the (vindicated) GP and off to CAMHS. We're at that point now ... waiting, although we've just completed the initial questionnaire.

He's coming to terms with it and one of his first comments was "it's OK, I'm not strange". He spent a long time, unbeknown to us, reading about Asperger's and did a self-diagnosis test.

As first he didn't want to meet anyone else with Asperger's or Autism. However, a year on from the process starting and he's starting to ask whether he could meet others with Asperger's.

Does this happen at all?

Oh, and thanks for reading my lengthy speil. As a family we're learning but we all need to develop strategies to help him, and he needs to himself. Where we think he also needs help is in developing hobbies/interests where he socialises; currently it's just Minecraft and his cats. He plays chess at school as well. Some idea of the type of hobbies which would interest a 14-15 year-old boy with Asperger's would be great!

[I've posted this elsewhere over the last couple of days, so it may be deja vu!]

Hey DCLane welcome.

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Hi, Welcome to WP.

I'm 17 now and I was diagnosed from CAMHS back when I was 11. Your son is 100% right he is not strange, and I always thought it was really great to have a diagnosis which explains why your not exactly like everyone else and makes you feel more confident with yourself. I your son is reading up on Aspergers himself I recommend buying him a book on it, I did a similar thing when I was getting diagnosed. I red all these online articles which weren't all helpful, but the best thing was when my mum bought me a book on the subject. (I'll put a link at the end to the one I recommend). The book was really helpful and made me feel more like others my age.

I think everyone at first doesn't want to meet others with aspergers as it seems a little strange and your not 100% accepting of the diagnosis when you first get it. But I do recommend it, let your son try talking to people on here I always found that helpful (but always remember online safety and privacy and never reveal any personal information).

As for hobbies I always liked skateboarding and playing the guitar. I joined a band where everyone was really nice and that made me a bit more of a talkative person. If your son can play a musical instrument I highly recommend that or even to do music lessons with others as the people are always nice and often they have similar interests and the more relaxed environment makes talking a lot easier.

I don't know if this was helpful or not. If you have any other questions, you or your son, feel free to message me and ask them. I've been through secondary school before and know at times it can be a little stressful and difficult, especially with aspergers. But please tell your son not to worry it gets easier, as you go from year 10 onwards and you start in new classes with people with more common interests, talking and making friends becomes a lot easier.

This is the book I got although I would not be quite sure age wise if it I best:
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Freaks-Geeks-As ... dpp_ttl_in

Thanks - that's helpful. We've already ordered the book but it's useful to know it's recommended

We've suggested if he can't get to a meeting(s) locally that he can use the online forums and this is probably the route we'll take. Expect him on here at some point ...