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diablo77
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12 Jan 2015, 10:57 am

I'm trying to figure out if this is a common thing. I've heard/read stories of people who had pronounced autistic traits as children virtually "outgrowing it," adapting as adults to the point where they pass easily as NTs and may not even meet spectrum criteria anymore. But I haven't heard whether any of them ever slide back later. As for me, I was pretty much classic autistic as a small child based on my mother's descriptions, except for the fact that I was verbal, in fact, my vocabulary was extremely advanced. At the time of my diagnosis (middle school age) I was more in the AS/HFA/ASD range, although I did have a lot of traits I didn't see in other people who identified as Aspies (more repetitive actions and rituals, special interests/obsessions, and meltdowns - they tended to just be rigid and lack social cue reading ability) so I never fully identified as one even when that was my diagnosis (later changed to HFA, then to ASD). As a young adult I managed to throw off a lot of my quirks and blend in a lot better, and for a brief period refused to even identify as a person on the spectrum because I wanted to have a "normal life." I might be kidding myself that I ever fully passed for NT (pretty sure I didn't) but I think I might have been able to pass as just an odd/eccentric person - people would sometimes react with surprise when I told them I was autistic once I started admitting it again. I still had meltdowns and stims, but managed to mostly keep them under wraps. As I'm getting older, though, it seems like a lot of my pre-adaptation behaviors are coming back, which has led to some of the problems I've had lately with work and life. Am I regressing? Will I end up truly "living in my own world" again like I did when I was a small child? Or is it maybe that the behaviors were still there all along, but I had to work so hard to hide them that I burned out, and now they are just showing themselves again because I can't keep it up any longer?



ASPartOfMe
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12 Jan 2015, 9:44 pm

I believe the last sentence the correct answer. The natural aging slowdowns plus burnout.


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JustSoCurious
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12 Jan 2015, 11:58 pm

I know for me, the symptoms are more pronounced in adulthood. My experience in the "real world" has been a constant struggle to obtain a sense of serenity, which currently only seems to manifest itself from distraction. I realized that being independent and having to do everything yourself are two completely different things. Life is no longer as predictable or controllable as it once was. I think it can be, but I am not there, and I suffer the consequences.



xenocity
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13 Jan 2015, 7:51 pm

If I am left alone without spending time with friends and such for weeks or more, my ability to socialize and connect reverts back to full aspie.


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rebbieh
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14 Jan 2015, 1:25 am

My traits/symptoms are much worse now than they were in childhood. I suspect the reason for that is that life's less predictable and more stressful for me nowadays. I'm also doing worse mentally (depression, anxiety etc.), which I'm sure contributes as well.



glider18
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14 Jan 2015, 8:36 am

For me, my autistic symptoms are more pronounced during times of stress and fatigue. During those times I just want to wrap up and absorb into my own world.


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Mort
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14 Jan 2015, 10:28 am

I'm 42 now and it's getting worse.

Part of it is I'm open now about my ASD, and don't try to "wear a mask" so much. If I feel a stim coming, I don't try so much to stifle it now. If I don't want to talk, I don't talk. If I don't want to look at someone, I don't look at someone.

As the cool kids say now, "I'm out of f***s to give".

But I'm suffering some pretty pronounced depression these days, struggling to thrive in a way that leverages my strengths and treats some of my more ASD-typical behaviors as differences instead of weaknesses.


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Shadow Wolf
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14 Jan 2015, 12:11 pm

My symptoms became stronger and more present when I started at a university. I took a few years off after high school, and because I didn't do that well in high school I started back at a community college which wasn't too bad as the environment was familiar to me and my peers tended to be 30 and 40 something workers, which is a normal crowd for me. Then a graduated from their, went to a university, and I became overwhelmed by the bombardment of messages saying you have to be a social butterfly to succeed, peers constantly approaching me for study groups, frequent in-class group work, having to remember so many names and having so many people wanting to talk you, expectations to dress certain ways for certain things and levels (I don't even like wearing different colors, let alone different styles), it all made me really stressed out, which is what lead me to seeking therapy for help with socializing which is what lead to my diagnosis of AS (one of the things when that lead down that path was asking for help with dinning with others, especially controlling my gag reflex, because one class I was in went to a sushi restaurant, which although I like the taste the texture is too much for me and it makes me gag). Fortunately though I can pass as a highly intelligent and equally eccentric NT. It has also made me went from wanting to get out of the house abit to looking forward to getting back home.



eggheadjr
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14 Jan 2015, 12:52 pm

ASPartOfMe wrote:
I believe the last sentence the correct answer. The natural aging slowdowns plus burnout.


^^^ I very much agree with that.


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Whatplanet
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15 Jan 2015, 1:22 pm

This happened to my uncle, he was a uni teacher and now he needs help with everyday things. he wasnt even diagnosed as autistic untill 2 years after it happened. from what i can gather it happened after a breakdown but its hard to get information on the subject from him as he will just end up talking at length about his routines at uni.



nick007
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16 Jan 2015, 2:25 am

glider18 wrote:
For me, my autistic symptoms are more pronounced during times of stress and fatigue. During those times I just want to wrap up and absorb into my own world.
Same here but it makes me want to lash out. I feel my symptoms were a lot worse when I was a kid. Learning about myself by researching & questioning & analyzing has helped me grow, mature & adapt. Also being in school with dyslexia & a rare low vision disorder that wasn't diagnosed & parents on my back about my sh!tty school performance really stressed me out.


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mr_bigmouth_502
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16 Jan 2015, 2:27 am

I think I regressed a lot when I was 18-20 years old, but then again, it may have just been because I was out of high school and I had no idea how "non-functional" I really was.



Lockeye
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16 Jan 2015, 2:48 am

If you would like more information about it, there's plenty of stories shared by those that have gone through that experience. I've been going through that process myself these past few years. It often goes by the terms "Autistic Burnout" or "Autistic Regression" and it's just a matter of adapting to your new set of circumstances and accepting them.


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andrethemoogle
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16 Jan 2015, 3:36 am

rebbieh wrote:
My traits/symptoms are much worse now than they were in childhood. I suspect the reason for that is that life's less predictable and more stressful for me nowadays. I'm also doing worse mentally (depression, anxiety etc.), which I'm sure contributes as well.


I'm in the same boat.

My anxiety is worse even though I'm not working and I have nothing to be stressed about. Some days I wonder why I still go on.



goldfish21
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16 Jan 2015, 4:11 am

I've had symptoms all my life, but they were at their worst in my late 20's. I'm 32 now and symptoms are at their best ever, pretty much. This is because a couple of years ago I figured out what was causing them and how to treat it mostly via diet.

It's been my experience that antibiotic induced intestinal dysbiosis causes/exacerbates autism symptoms. If the same thing causes your symptoms, chances are it's an intestinal infection that's gotten worse over time with antibiotic use and poor diet.

Feel free to pm me if you want to discuss any of this.


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qFox
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16 Jan 2015, 10:50 am

I feel the 'naturally outgrowing' of autism is kind of a myth, which would probably mostly apply to people who have everything settled: partner, steady job, house, etc. It is much easier to cope with autism if you have all these and don't have to worry as much about the future. A lot of us however do not have this luxury.

Personally my best time was in childhood, because I had to worry much less and the others of my age weren't at an age where they would bully me. From teens onward everyone tries to take advantage of you or bring you down in some way or another for their own advantage. Whether at school, university or work I can never fully trust anyone any more.