Am I cursed to be forever alone?

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Kinda felt like it. I mean I can't find a decent girlfriend my age to love me for me, The place I'm am have a shortage of girls my age, and most of all, When I befriend a girl, it's just staying as friends, when I badly want a Girlfriend. When I befriend a girl that starts with an A, it never ends well, When I do finally get one, it only ends for 2 months and they never pay me back anything they owe me (True story- I let her borrow $167. Guess what- Never came back, shut me out of her life, and She never apologized, all because she had an STD, and that was a Brain injury survivor).

I feel I'll be like the "Woman with many cats" thing, except it's more on Japanese toys than cats. I feel like I'm doomed from the very beginning and will likely die alone with no one to love or even have a kid of my own. Can anyone save me from the depths of this loveless hell?!

Okay, there's probably not a lot of perspective in declaring you'll be a crazy cat person, before you're out of your 20's.

What gets me is people acting like being alone is so terrible. Companionship has upsides, but if you are comfortable with who you are, solitude is no burden.

Bro, quit being so hard on yourself. You're cursed? More like blessed.

Listen the majority of us are going to what everyone else does. Get married, have kids, and when we die, no one will remember us except for our family. The only thing most of us will ever contribute to this world is by having kids. It is our biological nature to want to love but what if it is this that is holding us back?

See this as an opportunity. An opprotunity to contribute to the world to the best of your ability. Not by making love and babies, but by actually contributing to the world and society in general. We need more people like this. Because anyone can change the world, and if it's anyone, then it's you who can change it.


Well im done with the epic speech.

Nice speech man! Actually I do have stuff to contribute, for the good of our aspie kind. and that's to DESTROY AUTISM SPEAKS!! !
But how am I blessed and not cursed, when all I see is pity and jealousy?

Seems the crazy cat lady thing is getting catchy with the younger crowd. Your ex gf sounds like a scammer.

You don't say?
She used the pity card on me that "She was about to go to jail", and then later on the reason why she let me touch and suck her boobs was because she was a prostitute! And I was like "WHAT?!"
After that day she left me I became bitter with my money and refused to let anyone borrow from me after that.

So much so that they now have an action figure!! !



Amazon Store Page of this valuable collectible.

But a lifelong of solitude is not what everyone wants, I'd say it's what almost no one wants. Only very few feel comfortable with being a lone wolf all their life. It's not without it's reason that this board is one of the most active of this entire forum. The problems in people with autism are very diverse, but a deep sense of loneliness is a thing that almost everyone on the spectrum shares.

People with autism are often seen as loners but that doesn't mean that they voluntarily choose to be lonely, most are lonely by circumstance. Just like 'normal' people those with autism also need social interaction, companionship, love and sexuality for a healthy psyche. The lack of those feeds into many psychological issues and self hatred which again blocks any chances of further social interaction. It's a genuine issue which is often overlooked as most people feel like that social interaction is something which you are not entitled to and that you have to earn, which is a very hard thing for people disabled in social interaction. As a society people would rather stuff those with autism full of pills to make them accept their lonely fate, rather than being acceptive of them and helping them to fit in.

Try thinking of it as being a blessing rather than a curse.
See how many married men you can find who don't wish they were single like you are, that have to do endless overtime because their wives like to buy lots of useless things.
I wish I had known this at your age, so I could have chosen to be happy in the very same circumstances that I instead chose to be sad about.
Love is nice, but its also a lie, a trick to ensure we reproduce that soon turns to contempt for the bondage we realise we have committed ourselves too.

Anyhow, I,m off to play a few hours of "Elite Dangerous" now, try finding a woman that would allow you to do that.

Don't lend lots of money to people you barely know -- you can't get taken advantage of unless you LET yourself be!

Only a small percentage of girl's names start with A (and surely not all of them are sibgle, straight, interested in you, etc) - if you REALLY think it's an issue? Don't ask A girls out. Probl solved!

You could be doomed to be single forever (as can anybody/everybody) - how is panicking and/or getting super depressed about it working for you?

There's a lot of people out there who like to spot your weaknesses and take advantage of them, hence why you're 170$ in a hole. She probably figured she could just trade you sex for pity and money, which it seems happened.

Either way, never loan anyone money unless you fully trust them and have known them for a very long time..

This is spot on. I have been lonely all my life and it's difficult to feel happy about it and it most definitely brings about problems of it's own on top of any underlying disability.

I felt exactly like you did for almost all of my college career-and I was in college for 11 years! Found a girlfriend my last semester there, seemingly be chance. She ended up asking me out because I was still to scared to try and get another date with anyone. That lasted 18 months, we turned out to be too different, and I was sure it was my last change. About a year later I met my current wife and we have been happily married for 15 years. One should never give up hope, even though I felt as hopeless as anyone for a long time, and would have never believed that a story like mine would happen to me. Now if I could just remember that when I get depressed about being below average in dating statistics.

What I'm about to say here is based on personal experience, perspective, and conjecture. I readily acknowledge this could be due to circumstances and not applicable to everybody. But I hope not.
Most people seem to feel that something is wrong with them with varying degrees of severity. Our status on the spectrum makes this more apparent in our daily lives. To distract themselves from these feelings of inadequacy most people (NT and ASD) turn to interaction with others. It is exceedingly rare to find a person who recognizes his/her own flaws and weaknesses without shame.
I went through some challenges which included seeing several of my life-long dreams shattered. I have been tempered by adversity. I can look in the mirror and see my strengths and weaknesses and when I choose to better myself it is not because I am uncomfortable with who I am, but because I know I am capable of becoming more. And coming back to the point of this, I don't get lonely anymore.
And here's the kicker. I'm not the only one. I've met others who reached the same enlightenment about accepting yourself. It doesn't require facing the same life-shattering I went through. But it does require you to face your personal demons. Emotionally, I was left with the choice of suicide or facing those demons and I chose to fight. But you can pick that fight anytime. It won't be easy, but the world looks brighter from the other side.

I'd suggest developing a variety of skills and interests, so that when you do meet up with women, you have something to talk about.

You may want to go out and visit the local attractions--yes it can be hard to go places with with a lot a people, but not as hard as going to the same place on an actual date.