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beneficii
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06 Feb 2015, 4:50 am

At times, I will have violent or extreme thoughts rushing through my head, but while they wear me out and make me feel kinda bummed out I don't find them intrusive and just let them play out. I think this is the schizotypal "Obsessive ruminations without inner resistance, often with dysmorphophobic, sexual or aggressive contents." I think they're also called pseudo-obsessions.

My new (and old--he's known me since I was 13) psychiatrist diagnosing me on the schizophrenia spectrum seems to make sense the more time I look at.

I had my first self-disorder by age 6, so one might say I was on the schizophrenia spectrum by then. The self-disorder was that I noticed my thoughts were encapsulated and came above and behind my eyes and I could look out my eyes and up at my thoughts, as well as down at my feelings, from the back of my head. I thought it was neat and natural and had no words for it, until I discovered that this was a combo of the self-disorders "Spatialization of Experience" and "Distorted First-Person Perspective: Spatialization of the Self."


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heavenlyabyss
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06 Feb 2015, 1:51 pm

I'm not sure anyone can provide much help over an online forum (this goes for any problem). It's difficult to see the entire makeup of a person just by reading a post so I'm hesitant to give any advice or anything.

Having said that I do have problems with perspective sometimes. Sometimes I find myself thinking in 3rd person, often thinking exclusively about how others view me and not about how I view myself.

Sometimes I get feelings of hatred towards others. I usually don't get violent thoughts that I want to act on. If you are having violent thoughts that you want to act on, you should seek help. If you are having violent thoughts that you don't want to act on, it could be a manifestation of OCD or something of the like, not sure.



heavenlyabyss
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06 Feb 2015, 2:14 pm

Maybe this applies to you? It's a form of OCD.

http://iocdf.org/expert-opinions/expert ... bsessions/



beneficii
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06 Feb 2015, 2:34 pm

heavenlyabyss wrote:
Maybe this applies to you? It's a form of OCD.

http://iocdf.org/expert-opinions/expert ... bsessions/


I don't think it does, because I do not find the thoughts intrusive, neither do I attempt to resist, but instead simply let them play out.

What I experience meets this criterion for schizotypal disorder (my current psychiatric diagnosis) in the ICD-10:

Quote:
Obsessive ruminations without inner resistance, often with dysmorphophobic, sexual or aggressive contents


Note the term "without inner resistance." In OCD, there is always inner resistance.

I also meet the criterion for Pseudo-obsessions (1.6.4) in the EASE, as revealed in the interview I had on it:

Quote:
Pseudo-obsessions: obsession-like phenomena, which appear more as ego-syntonic (hence there is none or only
occasional resistance), frequently with pictorial imaginative character and with a content that is directly aggressive,
sexually perverse, or otherwise bizarre. May be anxiety provoking.


http://www.nordlandssykehuset.no/getfil ... r/EASE.pdf


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AardvarkGoodSwimmer
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06 Feb 2015, 3:02 pm

I think you're handling it pretty well. Your approach sounds like it's within the broad category of a zen approach. You don't give the thoughts additional power by either attempting to push them out of your mind or attempting to hold onto them. You just let them be.

And really, so much of TV is so saturated with violence, it might be rather surprising if a person didn't have violent thoughts.

Would an approach of a gentle and humorous talking back to the thoughts interest you?



heavenlyabyss
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07 Feb 2015, 12:36 am

That was a very interesting link you provided. I took a long time to respond because I wanted to read a lot of it.

Funny thing is I could relate to some of the symptoms but not the majority of them, so I might have a little bit of understanding, but not complete understanding.

Sorry if I discounted the original diagnosis. I guess it's just a reflexive thought to think that OCD is the "safer" diagnosis... funny how the brain works sometimes.

Honestly, that was some pretty heavy reading material. Very difficult for me to say anything about a person's state of mind on the other side of a computer. But I do appreciate the information. I simply can't diagnose you or anything like that.