Hi there need some advice

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Hi there im a 31 year old woman (for some reason my profile says 45) and I have been thinking for a while now that I could possible have aspergers or something else. Well in fact I have always felt there was something was a bit different with me as far as I can remember. The thing is, the fact that I have had quite a bad childhood had convinced me that this is why I have been feeling this way.

I have always felt like an outsider, I had very few friends as a child in high school I had a group of 3 friends but I always felt like they where leaving me out, although im mixed race so I kinda thought I had issues with that also.

I think I have had a weird stim since childhood. I lift my jumper up (not all the way lol) and swish it from side to side. All my close family have witnessed this and think its funny...I cannot help this. As I got older I have started tugging my jumper at the shoulder I think because I was aware I was showing my belly off. I still do both of these things to this day.

I am very tomboyish, never really bothered about my appearance, but I do try at times for a day or two. Never had a boyfriend until I was 21, he is now my husband through thick and thin (get back to that bit in a min)

I have no friends, well close friends of the family, but that's it. I lost contact with my school friends. I don't phone them if they need me they will phone me.

Very possessive over my things especially my gadgets, it really irritates me if people touch or use them.

I feel awkward when talking to people, I can have a convo but its like im constantly thinking the right thing to say and not really listening to the person, just waiting for them to talk so I can respond if you know what I mean.

I hate confrontation, arguments....I would rather just go very quiet and try to forget. I don't know how to deal with an argument.

I am very very sensitive to touch, and sex can be very difficult sometimes I feel like I have to hold my breath or constantly say to myself "im not tickly", if it gets out of hand I just cant do it and then I hate myself it causes problems between me and hubby. There are other issues that I wont go into! I have 2 children and even if they are sitting on my lap the wrong way, I tense up but grin and bear it because there my children. I can do cuddles, but find it very hard to tell my husband how much I love him, its like I physically cant say it until he says it, even though I have the urge to.

I am obsessed with computer games...mainly The Sims and I am obessessed with Aspergers and mental disorder at the moment to, as well as any other thing im interested in, I will research research research!

I get depressed sometimes and cant explain whats wrong with me

Cant stand it when people come up uninvited, puts me on edge.

I get bored easily and switch from task to task i.e start doing the dishes then want to research something I've thought of, its quite hard to get things done sometimes.

I don't mind taking the kids places but that's about it. Social events are very rare and I like to be told in advance or it worries me or makes me stressed.

There are probably very many other things but these are the main things I can think of.

I have been thinking about going to see the doctor for a while now and my husband thinks I should, but I don't know how to approach it, I feel I will be opening up a can of worms and they will just put me on anti depressants or something. I just don't know what to say.

Any advice would be very helpful to me.

Glad to be a part of the forum, some very interesting stuff here

Maybe see a PhD psychologist. That way, you'll be less likely to be prescribed anti-depressants.

It can be quite expensive to get an adult ASD diagnosis.

I guess--if you want some kind of confirmation, and can afford it--obtaining the formal diagnosis would be a useful thing.

Otherwise, if it's not practically useful, I wouldn't invest the bucks.

For the most part, people on this Site accept "self-diagnosis." Many are "self-diagnosed" themselves, without an official diagnosis.

Hey afro_gal welcome.

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Hi afro_gal! You do sound … familiar

As for diagnosis, it does depend where do you live,
UK has only GP route or private and both have their downsides…
And sometimes just knowing you might be an Aspian helps already! Self-awareness is sometimes better than any diagnosis.

Hi guys, thanks for listening and welcoming me to the community. Im still unsure whether to go to the doctors, I feel it will help both myself and my partner if I had some sort of confirmation. Its more getting my point across to the doctor and letting them know im serious about it, you know? I have never talked about it but felt it for a long time.

We will see, but this forums great btw

ha, mine says 45 too even though I put 1995 as my birth year. Something must be messing up across the board then.