I dont want to have friends, I just want a relationship

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Yes but as Mr. Warmo already knows, those girls are impossible to find because they're always by themselves and nowhere near him.I would recommend dexamphetamine. It should boost your energy and speed your studies. Duromine and Phentermine are also good ones to try.You should message them. Yes, sometimes girls do message guys but that might not happen to increase your chances you should message girls. Even go so far as to spam girls. If each girl has a 1/1000 chance of being the one, you should message many per night to better your chances of finding that 1/1000 girl.Some girls won't message you back but none of them will be offended. They expect to be messaged on a dating site. It's just like how I used to have difficulty overcoming the touch barrier with girls. I couldn't touch girls even in a nonsexual way. Eventually I learned that girls like and expect it and that it's an indispensable part of the pair-bonding process (something about melatonin in the girls brain). Anyway, back to you, you have to learn that girls like guys just as much as guys like girls. Girls want to be with guys. Some girl will want to be with you (so don't disappoint her). Girls can also dislike being single. Some girls can even get very depressed about being single.Well at least you asked her out. When I was your age when I knew a girl I'd like I wouldn't be able to work up the nerve to ask her out and then I'd spend years wondering if she would have said yes or not. Now you know the answer to that question for certain. If a girl has a 1/100 chance of saying yes, then you're one step closer to that 1/100 girl. You've eliminated 1 of the 99 who'd say no.Since when is it a problem to be right about something?

You cannot expect someone who is very unhappy with their own life to be happy for others' happiness. Being happy for somebody else is realistically possible only when you are happy yourself.

Mr Warmo, don't feel guilty about being unhappy at the moment nor distract yourself with envy of other peoples happy lives. Tune them out.

Have you considered online dating? As much as I hate the idea of it sometimes, it might be the answer to that problem - it's a direct way of meeting someone without going through the social process.

A word of advice - you should be friends with someone for a while before entering a relationship. Get to know their interests and what you like about them, and also look for their flaws and see if it is something that you can put up with. It's a multi-staged process, typically you don't just go from being strangers to a committed, loving relationship.

I can relate somewhat to your situation, even though I am fairly social. I wish the process was more one-on-one too. None of the girls that my friends hang out with strike me except for one who two of my friends have already tried very hard to get with and were rejected, I don't know if she would like me any more than them. I wish I could find a shy, eccentric, socially awkward girl who would tune into me and skip everyone else, but like Subjekt_9 said, they're all in hiding...because they're ashamed of the very qualities that I would appreciate in them!

I think Mr. Warmo already mentioned getting rejected by girls on dating sites. He'll just have to keep trying.

Tell me, why is it you don't like online dating? All of my dates have been from websites. I'm sure your meeting girls in meatspace is good too but I don't quite get how to enact your system of being friends with a girl first and gradually sliding into a relationship. Whenever I befriend a girl, we end up being friends. How do you go from one stage to the next?

Ive never contacted anybody though online dating, the girl I mentioned I met through another friend and talked through facebook
I am willing to try to use online dating although I dont know what I should say in my messages, do I just send messages saying "hi" or somthing?
Also, I live in the UK, is there any specific site you recommend?

Oh. I must have been thinking of a different thread.I've still been trying to figure out the answer to that question. If I still had my old files I could go over my transcripts and see which opening lines I had used with the girls I actually got dates with. Some of them were ones that messaged me first.

I've noticed lately I get a response if I opened with a question about one of our shared interests (that I gleaned from reading their profile). That's a good way to get them talking but I've found it doesn't work in the long run because once you've exhausted the subject you lose interest.

As for your idea of just say "Hi" or "Hello" or something, I've found that line has a low return rate on responses but out of very few who responded to "Hi" almost all of those went on dates with me because if they respond to such an unimaginative pick-up line it means they really like you. It means after reading your profile, they're interested in you but if you talk about their favourite TV show they're only interested in talking about the show, not interested in you.

One that I find works fairly well is "Hi. I'm [your name here]. Nice to meet you".[/quote]Also, I live in the UK, is there any specific site you recommend?[/quote]I think they have the same sites all over the English speaking world. Since these sites let anyone sign up, no matter which country they're from you can bet some girls in your area would have signed up because they have signups from everywhere.Which sites are best? Avoid Eharmony at all costs. OKCupid is very good but Cupid is terrible (don't get those two mixed up). Oasis is also very good. I've heard PlentyOfFish and Tinder might be good ones though I haven't tried them. Instead I mainly use OKCupid and Oasis, though one time I got a date from Geek2Geek. I met my on again off again girlfriend through Oasis. I think my opening line was just one of the preset responses and she added me to her contacts list because she liked the look of me, not because of how much creativity I put into my pick up line.

Actually, since girls judge more by your profile pic than what your pick up line is, make sure you have a really good profile pic.

I think it is a valid opinion to just want a relationship and no friendships. It is also possible to achieve as these things are unrelated. All he needs to do is find some way to get in touch with some neurodiverse girls out there that feel the same way, because they do exist. I wouldn't do it with online dating or through typical NT-type social gatherings, as the one's that hang there are too NT-fixated.

Don’t be too obsessed with finding a girlfriend. Some people concentrate more on finding someone so that they will not be alone, instead of looking for the right person for them. I don’t think that this will bring anyone happiness in the long run.

I think online dating, or just finding someone online is a good idea. Then you can take it slowly and take time chatting online and get to know each other.

But don’t expect that just because you would get a girlfriend that it would mean that you would be happy, that it would solve all your problems. It does not work like that. You cannot expect another person to solve your problems, even if it is very hard you have to do so yourself for your own sake.

A good relationship ads a lot to life, but don’t look at it as something that requires no work, because then you will be very disappointed.

Make a sign which says Buying GF then go out on the street and hold it up there for a couple of hours.

That's what people in Runescape used to do. Go to a crowded city and say Buying GF or press 123 for bf. You should do that irl.

Probably works better than online dating. At least you get instant results, unlike with online dating when you get a message per year or something.

A better approach might be to make a sign like "Aspie seeks Aspie gf".

Other than that, engage in your interest with people, and try to pick those that are opposite-gender friendly, and then you automatically solve the issue with interest compatibility.

Have you got any pointers for a good profile pic?

Also, I've signed up for okcupid, so I will try oasis too...

For a nice profile picture, it helps if you smile friendly, wear nice clean clothes.

It's maybe easier to advice against what would be a bad profile picture like a bathroom selfie,an offensive t-shirt, naked upper body...
If you follow these rules you should be ok

Yesh: OKcupid. It really IS teh best dating site on Earth!

I've met more people and gotten more dates there than any other site and it's fr33.

So, common sence haha? Well i'll be fine I guess on this front lol





Yep, I think I agree, its a good interface and its not pushing to pay to unlock features, well a bit but not crazy

As Bondkatten said, not a selfie. There are two types of profile pic that are too common on dating sites. The first, is the phone selfie, most commonly used by girls and the second is the webcam selfie, most commonly used by guys.

Sometimes guys use a phone selfie as well. I don't think there's anything wrong with using your phone if that's the best camera you have available but it need not be a selfie. I think it's a bad look if the picture is in front of a mirror or a worse look if you can see the subjects arm reaching up towards the camera.

I took my profile pick by setting my phone on a bookshelf and setting it to activate the shutter when I smiled (or in my case, half smiled, that's just the look I like for myself). I'll admit, the inside of my apartment living isn't the most exciting background for a profile pic, though it's better than a bedroom pic taken from a webcam or the inside of a public toilet. An outdoor shot would have been better, though I did get one girl interested in me because in the background my arcade machine was visible.

She said she was a retro gamer and swooned when I told her about my many consoles from the 70s, 80s and 90s. Things didn't work out when it turned out our other interests where totally different (like her horrible obsession with spray painting things pink) and after she stood me up four times and somehow made that into my fault. At first I was disappointing she was gone but now I'm glad because I really wouldn't want to be in a relationship with such a spiteful and hypocritical woman.

So when you get rejected, you can sometimes consider it a blessing. The sort of girl who would reject you for a trivial reason is not the sort of girl you should want to be with.

I've been meaning to get some outdoor pics. A guy here on WP told me a few months ago he got more responses when he changed in primary picture to one of him in front of a waterfall. I should do the same since there are several conservation parks containing waterfalls within a few hours drive from me. Or I could use some other interesting natural or urban landscape. You get the idea.

You might want to try the same. Get a picture of you in an interesting environment that isn't your house. Make sure it doesn't look like a selfie. Get someone else to hold the camera or at least use some other means to activate the shutter like I did (put the camera on a timer, remote trigger, etc).

As for OKCupid, I notice that I get a lot more replies from it than Oasis but not as many dates. It's like everyone is messaging each other more freely on OKCupid but if you get a reply on Oasis, that's more meaningful (because they don't reply as often). The girls on OKCupid mostly just want to chat about their favorite TV shows. You get less replies on Oasis but the few who reply are more likely to want to date you. You're right that the UI on OKCupid is generally more advanced than the one on Oasis.

What's wrong with eHarmony? I met many great women on that site particularly my current GF (that will probably become my fiancée in a couple months) and in all cases, they all contacted me first. The actual site itself is downright awful (and don't get started on their sleazy billing practices but it is the best by a long shot.

OKCupid where I live is almost exclusively made of clones of the "hipster" variety. Nobody was the least bit serious either and they all had a meat market mentality. What a waste of time!