I dont want to have friends, I just want a relationship

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Which sites are best? Avoid Eharmony at all costs. OKCupid is very good

So, common sence haha? Well i'll be fine I guess on this front lol

As Bondkatten said, not a selfie. There are two types of profile pic that are too common on dating sites. The first, is the phone selfie, most commonly used by girls and the second is the webcam selfie, most commonly used by guys.

Sometimes guys use a phone selfie as well. I don't think there's anything wrong with using your phone if that's the best camera you have available but it need not be a selfie. I think it's a bad look if the picture is in front of a mirror or a worse look if you can see the subjects arm reaching up towards the camera.

I took my profile pick by setting my phone on a bookshelf and setting it to activate the shutter when I smiled (or in my case, half smiled, that's just the look I like for myself). I'll admit, the inside of my apartment living isn't the most exciting background for a profile pic, though it's better than a bedroom pic taken from a webcam or the inside of a public toilet. An outdoor shot would have been better, though I did get one girl interested in me because in the background my arcade machine was visible.

She said she was a retro gamer and swooned when I told her about my many consoles from the 70s, 80s and 90s. Things didn't work out when it turned out our other interests where totally different (like her horrible obsession with spray painting things pink) and after she stood me up four times and somehow made that into my fault. At first I was disappointing she was gone but now I'm glad because I really wouldn't want to be in a relationship with such a spiteful and hypocritical woman.

So when you get rejected, you can sometimes consider it a blessing. The sort of girl who would reject you for a trivial reason is not the sort of girl you should want to be with.

I've been meaning to get some outdoor pics. A guy here on WP told me a few months ago he got more responses when he changed in primary picture to one of him in front of a waterfall. I should do the same since there are several conservation parks containing waterfalls within a few hours drive from me. Or I could use some other interesting natural or urban landscape. You get the idea.

You might want to try the same. Get a picture of you in an interesting environment that isn't your house. Make sure it doesn't look like a selfie. Get someone else to hold the camera or at least use some other means to activate the shutter like I did (put the camera on a timer, remote trigger, etc).

As for OKCupid, I notice that I get a lot more replies from it than Oasis but not as many dates. It's like everyone is messaging each other more freely on OKCupid but if you get a reply on Oasis, that's more meaningful (because they don't reply as often). The girls on OKCupid mostly just want to chat about their favorite TV shows. You get less replies on Oasis but the few who reply are more likely to want to date you. You're right that the UI on OKCupid is generally more advanced than the one on Oasis.

At the moment I'm using my holiday photos from Florida that I took in january, although I think I'm gonna give them a quick cropping to get rid of all the empty space around, I would think that sort of photo is good as it shows outside, and on holiday and to show in a nutshell that i'm a fan of disney. Ofcourse you can post more than one photo so I'm gonna have a think about that (I could take a photo of myself in my bedroom in front of my shelf of interesting items though...)

What's wrong with eHarmony?

What's wrong with eHarmony? I met many great women on that site particularly my current GF (that will probably become my fiancée in a couple months) and in all cases, they all contacted me first. The actual site itself is downright awful (and don't get started on their sleazy billing practices but it is the best by a long shot.

OKCupid where I live is almost exclusively made of clones of the "hipster" variety. Nobody was the least bit serious either and they all had a meat market mentality. What a waste of time!

You need to pay to reply? Fine. I don't mind paying fifty bucks a year but the girls there did. I didn't get any replies because they were all nonsubscribers. It's not that I eHarmony wanting payment is greedy, it's just that I think requiring payment from both parties leads to a broken system. It's like paying for a betamax player and then finding out they don't have many betamax tapes.

standard monthly subscription of $59.95.

sure its fine for professionals who make good money and women who prefer men who are professionals who make good money, wish women on okcupid would go there and leave okcupid to those poor girls after real love.

besides that they outright told me I am unmatchable.

But aren't a lot of the poor girls gold diggers? But on the other hand, with the middle class girls, even though they're already professionals who don't want for money, they want a guy who's in the social class as them. Catch-22.Maybe you're too pessimistic. You should answer the questions optimistically, even if it means you have to lie.

in harmonies case told I'm unmatchable.

When I played around on eHarmony, they told me the same. I think what this means is that they are unable to match aspies because of their lousy software. Thus, you shouldn't take this personally as it is their fault not yours.

wouldn't lying just mismatch me with people who I wouldn't have stuff in common with and fight a lot.

what does $20 a month get me at eharmony girls rejecting me and depression. yeah no thanks. okcupid is way better and though it still has the above things atleast I don't pay them money to get rejected and in harmonies case told I'm unmatchable.

Oh, and I should also mention she was a flex match who did NOT meet my age parameters so keep an open mind.

Woah, so you're with an older woman? Kinky!

When I played around on eHarmony, they told me the same. I think what this means is that they are unable to match aspies because of their lousy software. Thus, you shouldn't take this personally as it is their fault not yours.

Well, for me I got 15-20 dates (and about 8-10 second & third dates), 2 relationships and now one that is probably going to lead to marriage (yes, I say that after just 3 months as she is a dream catch). Sure, online dating is far from ideal but OKCupid got me one crazy BPD relationship and two first dates. The simple fact is that while "free" sounds good in theory it just promotes a throwaway mentality. The women on eHarmony know that by paying you are serious about finding love and are less likely to be a predator and I can tell you from multiple women I dated that women vastly outnumber men! I still hate that you cannot tell who is a paid subscriber though.

You are going to get rejected a lot no matter if you are God himself so you might as well get used to it. Doesn't matter what site you use: many online daters are simply very ambivalent and it has nothing to do with you at all. I spend hundreds of dollars on eHarmony over the years, faced more rejection than I did in school and it looks like it was WELL worth it. We would have never met in real life and I would have assumed she was married anyway. Oh, and I should also mention she was a flex match who did NOT meet my age parameters so keep an open mind.

if everyone on eharmony found marriage then the site would go out of business its in their best interest to keep people single.

eharmony is for upper middle class people. not poor lower class people. by paying it shows you ahve a good job and thats what the women there want.