Hi one and all, come here and hear my life story

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ginacc
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16 Apr 2015, 1:36 pm

I'm 23 female and from northern England.
I have aspergers syndrome which I was tested for when I was about 11, they concluded I did have it but I was at the high functioning end so stopped short of an official diagnosis, believing I'd get on better without it and all that comes with TAs and whatnot.
So I got on with life, struggled through school, becoming almost selectively mute. I left with low grades because my focus wasn't on the work it was on getting to the end of the day through my anxiety. Of course I was bullied dreadfully and made no real friends.
For the last 8 years I've jumped from minimum wage jobs to unemployment benefit and back again. Work is sheer hell, not because of the work, but the social interaction and the untold stress and misery there.
I've had numerous relationships which I was physically old even to understand, but not mature enough to really understand the consequences. One of which, aside from his constant having a go for my failings at social norms and lack of interest in why, was a abusive relationship. I slipped into depression leading me to attempt to take my own life, just 2months ago.
I'm now being referred by my psychiatrist to the ASD assessment people. I'm still signed off sick and I'm trying to get a diagnosis so I can understand myself better, and more importantly so I can get the support I need.
I've tried to manage without it for so long, thats enough.
Sorry about the essay and if you've made it all this way; hooray!



AspieUtah
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16 Apr 2015, 2:06 pm

ginacc wrote:
I'm 23 female and from northern England.
I have aspergers syndrome which I was tested for when I was about 11, they concluded I did have it but I was at the high functioning end so stopped short of an official diagnosis, believing I'd get on better without it and all that comes with TAs and whatnot.
So I got on with life, struggled through school, becoming almost selectively mute. I left with low grades because my focus wasn't on the work it was on getting to the end of the day through my anxiety. Of course I was bullied dreadfully and made no real friends.
For the last 8 years I've jumped from minimum wage jobs to unemployment benefit and back again. Work is sheer hell, not because of the work, but the social interaction and the untold stress and misery there.
I've had numerous relationships which I was physically old even to understand, but not mature enough to really understand the consequences. One of which, aside from his constant having a go for my failings at social norms and lack of interest in why, was a abusive relationship. I slipped into depression leading me to attempt to take my own life, just 2months ago.
I'm now being referred by my psychiatrist to the ASD assessment people. I'm still signed off sick and I'm trying to get a diagnosis so I can understand myself better, and more importantly so I can get the support I need.
I've tried to manage without it for so long, thats enough.
Sorry about the essay and if you've made it all this way; hooray!

A lot of your story sounds familiar to me. Good luck with your next bite at the diagnostic apple. And, welcome to Wrong Planet!


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Diagnosed in 2015 with ASD Level 1 by the University of Utah Health Care Autism Spectrum Disorder Clinic using the ADOS-2 Module 4 assessment instrument [11/30] -- Screened in 2014 with ASD by using the University of Cambridge Autism Research Centre AQ (Adult) [43/50]; EQ-60 for adults [11/80]; FQ [43/135]; SQ (Adult) [130/150] self-reported screening inventories -- Assessed since 1978 with an estimated IQ [≈145] by several clinicians -- Contact on WrongPlanet.net by private message (PM)


ConcreteDinosaur
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16 Apr 2015, 2:18 pm

I hope the attempt on your own life serves as a catalyst for you to be able to greater understand yourself, and get some help and guidance you need. You sound like you have had a very rough time, and your story will probably be relatable to quite a few people who read it here. I understand very well the hell of menial jobs, and how despairing they can make someone feel. Keep your sights on understanding yourself, and expressing yourself, and stay open to love even when it feels distant. I wish you the best, and perhaps you can make small steps towards a happier self.



RoadRatt
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16 Apr 2015, 4:24 pm

Hey ginacc welcome. :sunny:


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pattylarceny
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16 Apr 2015, 4:28 pm

I know where are you coming from and I wish you luck with everything. Welcome!



AnonymousAnonymous
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16 Apr 2015, 5:36 pm

Welcome to Wrong Planet!


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Silly NTs, I have Aspergers, and having Aspergers is gr-r-reat!