If you're 27 and never had a girlfriend, is it too late?

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Ya, I want to be able to remove that bitterness and resentment, jealousy, its just I consider those years I missed out on to be the innocent puppy love years

Why do girls need a protector? What do you hope to protect them from?

Well they say women's brains have not really changed since we humans were living in caves

True, but neither have men's.

You still haven't explained what women's allegedly unchanged brains require protection from?

(I've got a house, doors with locks, an alarm system, a cell phone to call for help and a body to use to run away from physical threats).

Remember you must protect her outside your home. The cops may take to long to respond and you'll have to do use your body for more than running away if you want to protect her as well as yourself. You don't want your battles to turn into an escort mission.

I'm female. And genuinely puzzled as to what men think women need "protection" from in the dating context.

Can someone explain? Please?

Other men, who are bigger and stronger than you. Or snakes, grizzly bears and White Walkers.

I personally don't seek such protection but I think some women do, so they look for men who seem like they would and could tackle the undead (etc.).

I find women protecting men much more fascinating than the reverse. After all, the typical protection done by men is a cave men instinct where protection is traded for sex.

I have had to work on these issues recently in therapy myself. One of the most obvious things, but something that is hard to admit, is that you can't change the past. The best we can do is to try and improve the present and the future. At least I now know what the problem was, and that not having a girlfriend until the late 20s is pretty typical for Aspies. All we generally see is NTs and how their lives are, and it is hard to not compare ourselves to them.

However, there is hope! I finally did get a girlfriend when I was 29. Would I have liked to have one earlier-I think so, although being single did allow me to do other things in live, like finish graduate school, without having to try and balance that with relationships. Probably a good thing since I have never really liked studying and put forth a lot of effort in that area.

The point is, it is never too late to start dating and relationships. I have had a couple of NT friends who didn't get married until they were in their 40s.

i hate it when people use the argument for people who did not get married until much later in life, because getting married is different from getting a boyfriend/girlfriend, or in this case, your first ever boyfriend/girlfriend, because getting your first ever boyfriend/girlfriend, relationship, is a milestone in any persons life, just like getting married is, but getting married is a different milestone, but i guess the reason why i say it like this is because i do NOT, i repeat, do NOT want my first gf to become my wife, i do not want to get married or settle down with my first.

I guess if I compare myself not to NTs but to aspies, I'm doing okayish by aspie standards. Sometimes I compare myself to other aspies. A few had relationships earlier in life. I know some who had one night stands through their teens and early twenties and one who has been happily married... since he was 19. He is now 23.

I probably shouldn't compare myself to other aspies, not only for my love life but also for other aspects of life... like my work life. There about a dozen other aspies in the office and some days it seems like they're all better at the job than I am I'm slow, I get confused, I zone out, etc. Part of the problem is I sometimes waste hours when I get confused by something and then I get accused of being to slow when I wasn't slow. Other days I actually am slow because I can't stop thinking about non-work related problems (or replaying movies in my head).


Most of the other aspies at work don't have this problem much. Some of them are very fast. We have to deal with some very arcane computer systems but some of them know them in such detail that I seriously suspect they have eidetic memories. If only I could find the work interesting. I could learn it inside and out if I was able to make it my special interest but I can't trick myself into thinking it's interesting.

I got behind today and then in the last hour I went into a frenzied rush. I felt so tired afterwards I couldn't concentrate in nightschool. I suspect my "frenzied rush" is really the same speed 99% of workers workers work at. No wonder everyone else is always so tired. Some people probably have to be in a rush 12 or 14 hours per day.

Anyway, back on topic, NTs say high school relationships don't count. They say someone who hasn't had a girlfriend since high school has never had a girlfriend. By that measure, we can't have a real girlfriend until after high school so that's less years we didn't have one. Less years behind. I think.You don't like studying and yet you completed grad school!? That's like me saying I don't like swimming yet I swum across the Atlantic. I mean, grad school is incredibly, soul crushingly hard, isn't it? That's what I heard anyway.

Not having your first girlfriend or getting married for the first time are 2 different things

Anybody know of any guys who did not get their very first girlfriend until my age or older? Late in 20's or 30's? Just asking because I don't want to believe that the older you get and are still single, the harder it gets

Didn't start dating until 28. Had an absolutely awful first try due to a combination of being too fussy and naive, landed a girlfriend at 29 (who was mentally unstable and probably had Borderline Personality Disorder), dated for another year and now am going to be engaged (hopefully!) within two weeks. I have no doubt in my mind she will say yes, assuming she isn't speechless.

My soon to be fiance went almost her entire 20s and 30s with almost no relationship experience. I am VERY glad she is inexperienced, with no bad habits or experience to taint her perceptions. What I wouldn't give to have lost my virginity to her. In my experience, the older I got the easier it become, both my numbers of women willing to date and number of 'successes'.

I'm 43 - and I suppose what is very disorienting is how within my lifetime we transitioned away from a Judeo-Christian culture with all the supports around... to a post-Christian gynocentric culture.

The family - and all the support structures built atop it - blown apart.


And I was one of the first ever diagnosed....