Do some apsies run from a relationship when faced with one?

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Hi everyone. I was dating a man who has Asperger's syndrome and in the beginning everything was great. We didn't date for very long but I really connected with him. I didn't fully know what aspergers was until I met him and soon realized while dating him that we had a lot common. Well to make this short, we were telling each other how much we liked each other. We were together sexually and soon after that I slipped and told him I loved him. After that he started to act different. Overall, he told me he was falling for me and now when we can be together he doesn't want a relationship.

He started to accuse me of things that were not true and ultimately said he wasn't looking for a relationship.

My question is, does this sort of thing happen often or has anyone experienced something like this before. I thought he could have been scared because he has never really been in a relationship, but it also feels like he may have found someone else to be interested in or was just using me to get what he wanted.

I am an NT but with a lot of aspie-like traits. I believe that I am also an aspie and I believe that is why I connected with him so much. Sometimes I wonder if he knew this about me and used it to get what he wanted.

I really believed him and thought we would be together as a couple.

I guess I trusted him more because he is autistic and because he seemed more like me. Anyway, there is always more fish in the sea as they say, but I can't help but to wonder if what happened had something to do with him being autistic and his lack relationships.

Anyway, if someone has some insight that would be very much appreciated.

I tend to do similar things to what he did. It is somewhat hard to explain. It isn't so much that I don't want a relationship. Sometimes to someone with Asperger's, or at least in my case, just socializing with other people can be mentally exhausting. Once I start getting closer to someone it starts to become overwhelming, even if I do really like the person.

Thanks for your reply, have you ever gone back to those people after sometime away or when you move on do you move on for good and try to forget about them?

Socialising with people drains my force and sanity.

I have gone back, but sometimes it seems like I run into the same problem even if I try harder. The other person usually just loses patience with me.

I don't understand, he dates you, but neglects to mention he doesn't want a relationship until after sex?

I've had that happen to me with an NT, he was just your average predator. This is an aspie though, so one of my thoughts is that maybe it wasn't clear to him that you wanted a relationship and he was just of the mind of being FWB or a NSA. Even then it's pretty disgusting not to make that stuff clear before becoming intimate.
I am missing context though. What did he accuse you of?

Not interested in any form of communication with you.
Does the forum have an ignore feature perchance?

Aspies are far more likely to be the following:
scared or uncomfortable after getting closer to someone
introverted (tired after social activity)
emotionally unavailable
oblivious

He's likely scared of becoming hurt after becoming to emotionally involved, or simply didn't understand the emotional needs of a relationship.

He accused me of using him to get back at my ex. He said that I was using him as a rebound and none of that is true. Unfortunately, it did not matter what I said because his mind was already made up. I just wish he would have thought about that prior to sleeping with me.

I can understand how the prospect of sex could sway someone's judgment, but it's not something to take lightly.

I really did care for him and when I told him I loved him I meant it. I can understand that sleeping with him, prior to fully understanding exactly what he had in mind for the future, was not very smart, but I realize now, that I was very vulnerable because I had recently got out of a relationship.

I didn't think to ask where things were going which wasn't smart. He told me he really like me and acted like I was his girlfriend so I didn't think I needed to ask. I also wanted to give him something special and he now seems like it never matter to him.

I guess I just expected more from him because as someone on the autism spectrum, I thought he would undertand what it feels like to be hurt.

Well I learned a valuable lesson.

Overall, the wishful side of me was trying to understand if he acted the way he did because deep down he was scared.

I'm not sure if he ever heard a woman say she loved him. Or if he was scared because he didn't understand what to expect from a relationship or what I expected from him.

Relationships don't have to be a death trap. I just wanted to enjoy his company, walks together, good conversation, laughter, I don't know if he ever had that with a woman.

It could also be that I gave him what he wanted and now wants someone else.

Gauldoth, thanks for the honest answer. I know some men/boys do that, but I truely thought he was different.

He acted different but maybe that was the aspie in him.

He said he was a virgin so I thought it would have meant something more to him then the usual chase, catch, then dump because she is no longer a challenge game.

If that is what he did I can't be mad at him or myself because life is ultimately a learning experience. I will say that when men/boys do stuff like that, they only cheat themselves.

I still hold out hope that he really isn't that type of person but the reality is that we are not together.