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pluto
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09 Oct 2007, 4:50 pm

It occured to me today,when being aware of my
colleagues at work talking in muffled whispers to each other yet again,that it's something I never do.

Apart from the fact I find it tricky to talk in hushed
tones,I'd feel self conscious and guilty if I was
whispering in earshot of others.

Anyone else have similar feelings ?


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Ana54
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09 Oct 2007, 5:08 pm

I know, I don't like keeping secrets from people either... I've beenostracised by eople in school all my life and I don't want anyone to think I'm doing it to them, and I am if I'm leving them out of something, whetherI know them or not I want everyone whether I've met them before or not, to know I'll be honest with them. We're so lonely in life because we build walls instead of bridges.


Now I'm going off on a tangent.



pandd
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09 Oct 2007, 5:18 pm

Yes, I have difficulty both with physically making utterances in an audible whisper - I struggle to keep my voice at a whisper while also being audible to those the whisper is intended for, and I do not like to whisper around people not included in the whispering for the reasons already outlined above.



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09 Oct 2007, 5:19 pm

pluto wrote:
It occured to me today,when being aware of my
colleagues at work talking in muffled whispers to each other yet again,that it's something I never do.

Apart from the fact I find it tricky to talk in hushed
tones,I'd feel self conscious and guilty if I was
whispering in earshot of others.

Anyone else have similar feelings ?


I don't like whispering, I don't do it.

If I don't like something about someone I will just tell them. There is no point in hiding it.
I will whisper sometimes though, but not about other people. It's more If I am saying something to myself, such as reminding myself to do things.


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holdsteady
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09 Oct 2007, 5:33 pm

i have whispered before when i want to talk quietly, else otherwse i dont whispre


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woodsman25
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10 Oct 2007, 10:24 am

I dont wisper, i think its rude when others do that, and they do at work, i dont regularly join the conversation(s) so sometimes they will gather and wisper and talk very softly obviously not wanting me or others to hear, quite rude!

I used to always have to be told to quiet down, i was always shouting and not realzing I was always shouting. I have gotton better tho, i turned it down a notch, but still dont wisper.


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Triangular_Trees
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10 Oct 2007, 10:28 am

me and my bf both whipser at times when its relevant



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10 Oct 2007, 11:49 am

I talk very quietly but I can't whisper quietly. In primary school at some stage somebody said it made no sense I would talk so quietly yet then could only whisper loud. I have a lot of trouble with the volume of my voice.



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10 Oct 2007, 1:00 pm

Whispering is a very rude pastime for a certain type of mentality. Two or more people whispering in front of another is a way of bullying and crazy-making, especially when you know if you called them on it they would deny they were whispering about you. I've been there too many times not to know that this kind of behavior by "them" is vile and evil. I don't know if I would go so far as to say that people with Asperger's do not whisper, but I would say that if they do they keep it to a minimum and don't use it to purposely dis-include and dis-respect others. Sometimes it's necessary to talk in a hushed voice so as not to disturb others.



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10 Oct 2007, 1:16 pm

I can never decide if I should try to listen in when people gossip at work. It's rude to whisper in front of people - if you have something private to say, for goodness sake go somewhere private! But is it more rude to eavesdrop?



Triangular_Trees
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10 Oct 2007, 1:25 pm

Quote:
but I would say that if they do they keep it to a minimum and don't use it to purposely dis-include and dis-respect others


You can't just automatically exclude things like that, you have to look at each situation individually. For example, I have used whispering to intentionally dis-include others. My bf and I were having a very personal conversation with his parents, and he was getting upset. So I whispered some things to him that I would have never in a million years said in front of his parents, and the effect would have been no where near the same if I had. He whispered back some questions he was unsure of. when we were having trouble hearing each other his mom said, "Why don't you just speak aloud so everyone can hear?" We ignored her though. I mainly did because I was emphasising to him how accepting his parents agreement would allow him to feel a certain way in his house, a way he wasn't comfortable with his parents knowing he liked to feel.

Not to mention there were also things at the time like saying, "I made this agreement with them because I love you and want to..." and his parents might not have been aware we were dating then (though i'm sure the fact that we asked to sleep in the same bed, and that I was present for this conversation and its precursor were huge clues to the fact that we were a couple)



MysteryFan3
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10 Oct 2007, 5:35 pm

NO, I NEVER HAVE TROUBLE WHISPERING. :D


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StonedRoach
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10 Oct 2007, 6:19 pm

I'm very quiet.

Nah. Actually I can't whisper low enough to where someone around can't hear me. Or it's too soft.

I can still do this though! :D



cosmiccat
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10 Oct 2007, 7:31 pm

Triangulartrees said:

Quote:
You can't just automatically exclude things like that, you have to look at each situation individually.


You are right. There are times when it would be wise to whisper when discussing personal matters, but then it would be even wiser to go to a private place for that discussion. I think the OP was talking about work place or social gatherings. You can do whatever you want in your own home I suppose.



GypsysOdyssey
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10 Oct 2007, 7:37 pm

I have alot of trouble with volume control of my voice. I'm so bad at whispering that I've made it a point to just stay silent in places you're expected to whisper, like the library. Most of the time I talk too loud, but then at times, especially when my attention is elsewhere, I mumble low enough people can't hear me.

Oh well, at least people never think I'm trying to exclude them from a conversation. :)


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rathermousie
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10 Oct 2007, 8:13 pm

I don't like to whisper and have difficultly when I've tried because I can't speak softly enough in that situation.

On the other hand, for years I had trouble speaking loud enough to be heard in normal conversation. I got so tired of it because everyone would tell me to speak up and when I did I felt like I was yelling. I don't have as much trouble with that now but it is still a problem occasionally.