Communicating with Adults: Easier for your AS child?

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9CatMom
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13 Feb 2008, 9:16 pm

I still have an easier time talking to people older than myself, probably because I share a lot of the same interests. I have virtually nothing in common with people my own age.



ster
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14 Feb 2008, 6:13 am

nitramnaed~ she's 9



LynnInVa
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14 Feb 2008, 7:03 am

I will second that AMEN for all the replies.

thank you all for sharing with me!



EvilTeach
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14 Feb 2008, 4:04 pm

It certainly applied to me as a kid.
and to my boy as well.

It's a know aspy trait, but I have never seen a good explanation as to why it should be.

It is disheartening to think that my son spends most of the day in the company of his PEERS

:(



nitramnaed
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14 Feb 2008, 4:43 pm

ster wrote:
nitramnaed~ she's 9


Thanks.......Mine is 8 and she rarely complains that she has no friends. But I'm always on the lookout with her to see if at least she verbalizes it to us. Sometimes it's hard to tell if it does bother her and she is just not telling us.



ster
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15 Feb 2008, 10:09 am

my daughter only recently started complaining of not having friends......up until this year, she would go on and on about how everyone was her friend~ even though she had no friends at all.....



nitramnaed
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18 Feb 2008, 9:14 pm

ster wrote:
even though she had no friends at all.....


It's tough to watch. My wife says that she's missing the best part of her life.... :|



ster
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19 Feb 2008, 7:31 am

it's very tough to watch........i try to remember that i was a very eccentric child with few friends myself, and i turned out ok.....



LCMom
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20 Feb 2008, 10:57 am

Yes and yes!

My son is very comfortable talking with adults, although he can be long-winded at times. He does really well with young kids. Same-aged peers are seriously difficult. Things are better if the other child is "gifted" and same age.

Taking turns in games is not too difficult, but following the rules is.
My son is willing to follow the rules, but as games progress and other kids abandon or change the rules, my son cannot tolerate the situation. He sees it as very unfair. So, he usually avoids playground games at recess. Creates much less conflict.



mom2bax
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22 Feb 2008, 12:48 am

my son gets along better with those older than him too but mostly because they can do the math questions he asks.
i can't remember who said it but i would agree that it probably is easier for them to be with adults because they have more patience with them and won't automatically reject them. my son speaks like a little man not like a 4 year old, so it only makes sense that he talks more to adults and the bigger kids,
but he does get along fairly well with his younger sister and it would make sense that aspies gwt along with those who are younger because of the social age differences.



shopaholic
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22 Feb 2008, 5:29 am

Seems to me that this is more of a problem for the parents (looking at the issue from an NT viewpoint) than for the actual kids involved!

I too can relate to this situation. The point was that I found most kids of my own age pretty stupid & boring - they didn't want to talk about the stuff I was interested in, whereas adults did.

The other kids only seemed interested in "being part of a group" for its own sake - at that age, I did not see the point of a group if it wasn't "about" anything!! !



ster
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22 Feb 2008, 8:04 am

i don't see my daughter's ability to converse with adults a deficit.....i think it's great......i just worry about her inability to converse with those her own age.....if it didn't bother her that she has "no friends" ( her words), i suppose i wouldn't be as concerned.