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ephemerella
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09 Dec 2008, 8:09 pm

mitharatowen wrote:
Hm interesting. Well you have a much clearer interpretation of the behavior than I do.
If I had to guess.. I would just say that its insecurity. People who are insecure sometimes insult others to elevate themselves


Isn't that elevation a kind of domination issue?

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and of course their insecurity comes to the fore when they are insulted in turn and they get defensive. If its some kind of struggle for dominance .. I would (and do) have absolutely no clue. I don't play such games and, until recently, didn't even know they existed!


I'm not sure I understand the notion of insecurity for online behavior, but I guess I sure do get uncomfortable sometimes at parties and other in-person encounters. I guess online I'm much less sensitive to trying to be nice, which is probably the wrong attitude...

Good night.



faithfilly
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09 Dec 2008, 8:44 pm

timeisdead wrote:
Shadow50 wrote:
They run on the wrong types of fuel ... adrenalin and testosterone.

But what explains their extreme sensitivity to insults (in return for their atrocious behavior)?


Ego and/or pride?


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elderwanda
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09 Dec 2008, 9:32 pm

Daniel41149512 wrote:
They are polite to people they don't like (only learned this one very recently), for no reason I can understand.



Are you talking about the obviously phoney, saccharin politeness? Or do you just mean showing basic common courtesy and lack of rudeness?

I think the second case is necessary sometimes, just to avoid friction. Sometimes you simply have to have dealings with a person that you don't like very much, whether it's a coworker, your kid's teacher, a neighbor, or what. You don't need to be gushing all over them with a pack of lies about how much you like their haircut and how beautiful their children are, but it doesn't hurt to avoid blatant rudeness.

If I really dislike the person, I say as little as possible, and try (if I'm on the ball) not to roll my eyes and sneer so much. That's what got me in trouble in the military all the time. I rolled my eyes and sneered at all of my supervisors the instant they looked away, because they were all such a-holes. Apparently some people thought that wasn't appropriate. Go figure. I had no idea other people would be watching, or that they would actually care enough to pass it on. Glad those days are over. :)



mitharatowen
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09 Dec 2008, 9:42 pm

ephemerella wrote:
mitharatowen wrote:
Hm interesting. Well you have a much clearer interpretation of the behavior than I do.
If I had to guess.. I would just say that its insecurity. People who are insecure sometimes insult others to elevate themselves


Isn't that elevation a kind of domination issue?

You know what... you've got a good point there lol



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09 Dec 2008, 10:05 pm

They are not ALL like that (okay perhaps a large number of them are that way). In fact I happen to know many nice ones. Believe me, I have come across some of those under the spectrum that are really not all that different.


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Shadow50
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10 Dec 2008, 2:22 am

Daniel41149512 wrote:
Shadow50 wrote:
They run on the wrong types of fuel ... adrenalin and testosterone.


Everyone runs on adrenalin and testosterone.


True, but I understand there is a matter of degree involved here. I have read that because of differences in brain wiring, typpies are more responsive to adrenalin and testosterone, whereas aspies are more responsive to other hormones such as dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, etc.

[An aside ... this is unconfirmed, and just a train of thought I have been entertaining ... this may go toward explaining why aspies are generally not breeders.]

An example: if I am walking through a field with some typpies, and we encounter a snake. My response is "hmmmm, a snake, interesting markings." The typpies immediately kick in their adrenlain driven flight, fight or freeze mode and react accordingly, usually with a fair degree of panic. Run, kill it, or crap themselves. The other aspies that I know personally have the same non-reaction as I do.

I have had situations where I have gone to have a quiet, polite chat with a neighbour about their dog keeping me awake all night. By the time I got three words out, they were literally oozing testosterone and flying into a rage. I have never encountered this with an aspie ... in my experience we are much more prone to focussing on the topic rather that seeing everything as a personal attack that requires a vicious response. I'm not saying all typpies are like this neighbour, far from it, but I've yet to encounter an aspie that is.


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10 Dec 2008, 4:23 am

I have encountered aspies that acted like NTs. The bullying, the ridicule, the attacks, etc.
I know it's not NT behavior they did, it's human behavior, part of being an ass.

I don't lump NTs and aspies into categories and play the "You don't have AS" card just because I didn't like what they did that I have seen NTs do. God we act superior when we do that. I am still not convinced there is a difference about how aspies or NTs act in a negative manner. I have been bullied by enough aspies to prove me this unless I want to say they were fake.

Back then I thought it was just an NT trait they had but it was a shame they were aspies. Now I know it had nothing to do with acting like an NT or not, it had to do with them being as*holes. Some aspies are jerks just like some NTs. We're not incapable of being mean or bullying or ridiculing, etc.



Samara
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10 Dec 2008, 4:37 am

Thats so true and some can be manipulative too.
It's like me not that i have ever tried to be manipulative or deviat to anyone, really. I dont believe in treating people like that and i couldnt be bothered anyway. It's hard enough to NOT get in trouble by just acting good.
am yeah, so what i am saying is at first i can give some people the impression that I am dumb (maybe if they dumb enuf to think that) or just quiet, a 'stand over' girl but I am not.
I am not sorry to anyone that gets suprised of that, to find out I am not what they thought cause they shouldnt have acted like a smart ass in the first place.
In comparison to NT's I never been good a lieing. I just cant play the games they play or Ive never got away with it.
I am just me. Straight forward and just say what i am thinking cause that is just who i am. If i am not feeling in safe enviroment i have learnt to say very little. It can take people along time to get to know me or before i let my guard down.
I can tell with some people near straight away that i can trust them
to a degree anyway. I have had better instincts or judge of character about other people that some or most of my NT's friends so aspies can be very atuned. They are just slow to get it
I know i can be anyway. I am so in my world Im not even noticing how crazy I am acting or responding to people around me
Its just me and my own party. People can get frustrated That is just tough They should learn to accept differences. I have to accept them not understanding me or getting annoyed and i try and think i am very patient with people. I can find alot of other people annoying too especially NT's. I dont go off all bitchy on a power trip over some one just cause i want to. Why and NEVER will i go out of my way to be polite to some one who just being rude. I just show body language and attitude back the same as them I ignore them or talk over what they are saying because not interested and want them to go away.
Other times I will confront a person. People dont usually like but i try, i really do. i mean i try to be assertive. I dont really think i am that good at being assertive.
Most times, i proberly just say how i am feeling
ifeeling "Stop putting your f*****g s**t over me" and they are like what! what, what have i done and i just say "Dont give me that" You been puttin your s**t over me and acting like a ***** ****** for weeks and YOU KNOW IT!"
Thats one confrontation I had and they dont say nothing they shut right up n show respect and so i give them a second chance and be nice too :)



AveApollo
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23 Aug 2016, 4:33 am

timeisdead wrote:
Shadow50 wrote:
They run on the wrong types of fuel ... adrenalin and testosterone.

But what explains their extreme sensitivity to insults (in return for their atrocious behavior)?


I disagree that this is the cause of their incorrect reasoning or reactions, as I seem to recall reading a link between pre-natal testosterone resulting in higher incidence of AS. Also, I think my adrenalin and testosterone can be too high (or maybe I just react to stuff too much and get easily frustrated!).
However, when I am reacting, I realise this and have learnt to accept when I might be wrong (I had a confidence issue which certainly made me want to defend my stance). But they just seem to get more and more defensive and upset when you correct them.


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AQ (Autism Quotient) = 40 (AQ-10 = 7.0)
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AveApollo
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23 Aug 2016, 5:35 am

Non-AS people/NTs: don't read into things and assume things. The OP / other AS people didn't say ALL NTs do x,y,z.

AS people: we DO get defensive. But we turn inwards first ("I can see the reasoning, why can't they?"). They turn outwards first ("this person is saying x,y,z" - even when they didn't).


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AQ (Autism Quotient) = 40 (AQ-10 = 7.0)
EQ (Empathy) = 8/80 one time and 16/80 another
FQ (Friendship) = 54
RAADS-R = 146
Cam Mindreading Face-Voice = 95%
Dyslexia & OCD = official diagnosis.
Aspergers = referred to specialist, awaiting assessment.


naturalplastic
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23 Aug 2016, 7:31 am

AveApollo wrote:
timeisdead wrote:
Shadow50 wrote:
They run on the wrong types of fuel ... adrenalin and testosterone.

But what explains their extreme sensitivity to insults (in return for their atrocious behavior)?


I disagree that this is the cause of their incorrect reasoning or reactions, as I seem to recall reading a link between pre-natal testosterone resulting in higher incidence of AS. Also, I think my adrenalin and testosterone can be too high (or maybe I just react to stuff too much and get easily frustrated!).
However, when I am reacting, I realise this and have learnt to accept when I might be wrong (I had a confidence issue which certainly made me want to defend my stance). But they just seem to get more and more defensive and upset when you correct them.


I hope that you are aware that you are replying to a post made eight years ago, to a person who has probably died of old age, or is otherwise not active on this site anymore. Lol!



AveApollo
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23 Aug 2016, 8:38 am

naturalplastic wrote:
AveApollo wrote:
timeisdead wrote:
Shadow50 wrote:
They run on the wrong types of fuel ... adrenalin and testosterone.

But what explains their extreme sensitivity to insults (in return for their atrocious behavior)?


I disagree that this is the cause of their incorrect reasoning or reactions, as I seem to recall reading a link between pre-natal testosterone resulting in higher incidence of AS. Also, I think my adrenalin and testosterone can be too high (or maybe I just react to stuff too much and get easily frustrated!).
However, when I am reacting, I realise this and have learnt to accept when I might be wrong (I had a confidence issue which certainly made me want to defend my stance). But they just seem to get more and more defensive and upset when you correct them.


I hope that you are aware that you are replying to a post made eight years ago, to a person who has probably died of old age, or is otherwise not active on this site anymore. Lol!



...it's an old post, so what? People are still reading it because it exists on the site. People might find it useful to read or want to add their own experiences, or discuss this still. This is a forum. It involves a group of people, not just the OP or the poster of the post you are replying to specifically.
Or do you think each reply must specifically be directed at the OP or the last post you commented on?


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Tests Results:
AQ (Autism Quotient) = 40 (AQ-10 = 7.0)
EQ (Empathy) = 8/80 one time and 16/80 another
FQ (Friendship) = 54
RAADS-R = 146
Cam Mindreading Face-Voice = 95%
Dyslexia & OCD = official diagnosis.
Aspergers = referred to specialist, awaiting assessment.


naturalplastic
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23 Aug 2016, 8:48 am

AveApollo wrote:
naturalplastic wrote:
AveApollo wrote:
timeisdead wrote:
Shadow50 wrote:
They run on the wrong types of fuel ... adrenalin and testosterone.

But what explains their extreme sensitivity to insults (in return for their atrocious behavior)?


I disagree that this is the cause of their incorrect reasoning or reactions, as I seem to recall reading a link between pre-natal testosterone resulting in higher incidence of AS. Also, I think my adrenalin and testosterone can be too high (or maybe I just react to stuff too much and get easily frustrated!).
However, when I am reacting, I realise this and have learnt to accept when I might be wrong (I had a confidence issue which certainly made me want to defend my stance). But they just seem to get more and more defensive and upset when you correct them.


I hope that you are aware that you are replying to a post made eight years ago, to a person who has probably died of old age, or is otherwise not active on this site anymore. Lol!



...it's an old post, so what? People are still reading it because it exists on the site. People might find it useful to read or want to add their own experiences, or discuss this still. This is a forum. It involves a group of people, not just the OP or the poster of the post you are replying to specifically.
Or do you think each reply must specifically be directed at the OP or the last post you commented on?


First off: no one WOULD be reading it if you hadnt necro'd it.

Second:the tone you were writing in indicated that you expected a response from the person you yourself were responding to. The person who prolly hasnt been on the site for eight years. Just making sure you know that they aint gonna answer. Someone else might, but not that person.

Would it kill you to add a disclaimer like "I know that I am necroing an old thread, but i think that this topic is interesting"?



AveApollo
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23 Aug 2016, 9:12 am

naturalplastic wrote:
AveApollo wrote:
naturalplastic wrote:
AveApollo wrote:
timeisdead wrote:
Shadow50 wrote:
They run on the wrong types of fuel ... adrenalin and testosterone.

But what explains their extreme sensitivity to insults (in return for their atrocious behavior)?


I disagree that this is the cause of their incorrect reasoning or reactions, as I seem to recall reading a link between pre-natal testosterone resulting in higher incidence of AS. Also, I think my adrenalin and testosterone can be too high (or maybe I just react to stuff too much and get easily frustrated!).
However, when I am reacting, I realise this and have learnt to accept when I might be wrong (I had a confidence issue which certainly made me want to defend my stance). But they just seem to get more and more defensive and upset when you correct them.


I hope that you are aware that you are replying to a post made eight years ago, to a person who has probably died of old age, or is otherwise not active on this site anymore. Lol!



...it's an old post, so what? People are still reading it because it exists on the site. People might find it useful to read or want to add their own experiences, or discuss this still. This is a forum. It involves a group of people, not just the OP or the poster of the post you are replying to specifically.
Or do you think each reply must specifically be directed at the OP or the last post you commented on?


First off: no one WOULD be reading it if you hadnt necro'd it.

Second:the tone you were writing in indicated that you expected a response from the person you yourself were responding to. The person who prolly hasnt been on the site for eight years. Just making sure you know that they aint gonna answer. Someone else might, but not that person.

Would it kill you to add a disclaimer like "I know that I am necroing an old thread, but i think that this topic is interesting"?


First off: It is less likely to be read, but: Nobody WOULD be reading it if I hadn't posted? You're wrong. I googled the subject and followed the search result link to here, then discovered this thread/post.

Second: would it kill you to not be so condescending with your 'lol!' as if to mock? I didn't realise it was an old post at the time (I don't spend much time on posts so I will bare the original post date in mind going forward). Therefore, I didn't put any disclaimer that you seem to think is so important.

Third: (bonus) I'm not wasting any more time replying to you as it adds nothing to the discussions of the topic.


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Tests Results:
AQ (Autism Quotient) = 40 (AQ-10 = 7.0)
EQ (Empathy) = 8/80 one time and 16/80 another
FQ (Friendship) = 54
RAADS-R = 146
Cam Mindreading Face-Voice = 95%
Dyslexia & OCD = official diagnosis.
Aspergers = referred to specialist, awaiting assessment.


CockneyRebel
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23 Aug 2016, 1:04 pm

Because they think that everybody should want to be exactly the same.


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CockneyRebel
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23 Aug 2016, 1:09 pm

I should have known that this thread has been necroed


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