ephemerella wrote:
Well, I've done some of the last steps, and social psychology study too. I suppose the key is that you have an inner confidence that maybe I lack. I do know that confidence and a low expectations (of my social success) feeds into poor performance socially. It sounds to me that your secret ingredient is the belief in yourself that frees you from being confused and disoriented.
Thanks for reminding me of this! That is really, really beneficial. I think we can focus so much on mind-blindness and other limiting cognitive features of social behavior that we forget the freeing effect of inspired confidence.
Thanks so much for this reply.
No problem. Two things I missed off though:
(a) Arrogance can work in succeeding socially, the only catch is it might not be a price worth paying. Try to stick within the bounds of confidence, difficult it may be.
(b) Asides the very basics socially, the key thing to (a) and actually doing well in the social game is conversation. If you are good at this, most problems go away. I would really recommend Leil Lowndes tips book on this as a starting point.
Thanks again! I will order this book. I have mingling tips stuff but never actually got a conversation book... this makes sense for me to get one since I've been practicing verbal skills for about a couple of years now and am getting much better, verbally. Maybe good enough to start thinking about conversation.
20 Mar 2009, 6:38 pm
