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It's been a long time
posted at 07:03 am on 11-14-2008
...since I wrote anything here and it's very unlikely that I'll start writing regularly. I don't blame you if you don't give a damn, dear reader. I don't really give a damn either.
I haven't been doing anything really intresting since last time. I have studied some works of C.G. Jung and i think I'm becoming a Jungian or something. He had very intresting thoughts about faith and psychology. If you want to understand religion, then it's a good idea to start reading books about psychology and religion.
That's all I have to say for the moment.
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Being social...
posted at 01:23 pm on 09-15-2007
The school year began a couple of weeks ago, as always I plunge into melancholy the first weeks. Beginning the school year with feelings of sadness and loneliness has been a tradition of mine for 13 years of hard studying.
I always begin the year by realizing how different I am and trying to make new friends and revitalize old friendships. I always ask myself if I'm wasting my time on shallow and vain people who don't really give a sh*t about anything else than themselves. From my point of view it's sometimes very hard to tell the difference between friend and foe. This causes many irritating problems.
I'm slowly realizing that I don't really care if they give a d*mn or not, I'm not socializing only to please others. I do it to satisfy a need I know I have somewhere deep inside. I think I'm becoming cynical...or realistic...or selfish...I have no idea, maybe I hate the whole world, perhaps I love the whole world.
All I know is that this year will be very different.
Am I wasting my time again? Writing blog entries that won't be read, participating in discussions that lead nowhere, gaining nothing and giving nothing. How should I know? Is anything for real?
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Thoughts about freedom
posted at 11:50 am on 08-28-2007
At school and at home children have always been competing,trying to get as much attention as possible from their parents and classmates.They struggle to be seen and heard. Not because they have something important to say, but because they want to prove something. They want to show that they are someone in their own eyes and by doing that they hope to become something in someone else's eyes.Their struggle to be appreciated limits their will to be creative and their ability to think independently.
What about the child who doesn't participate in the eternal struggle for a place in the sun? Only those who don't desire to be appreciated for what they do have the freedom to choose independently what they want to become. They are not controlled by other people's opinions and are thus free.
That is not the same thing as being isolated and inprisoned by loneliness.Someone who is unable to be a part of society is not a hero because he never chose to live the way he does.A prisoner has no alternative and can hardly be praised for his ability to sit lonely in his prison cell.Freedom can't be the same thing as loneliness and misery.
Then what is freedom? I guess it is the ability to live as a part of society, taking responsibility for your actions never doing what everyone else does only because they do it. Questioning the "truths" that everyone takes for granted and creating an own opinion about things.Not letting oneself be controlled by fear of disapproval or fear of being an outsider.Someone who makes decisions based on fear can never be free.He is forever a prisoner, a slave who does what he has to only because he fears punishment.
Isolating oneself from society is cruelty and will lead to nothing but suffering.Living as an independent individual within society able to partake in decisions, cooperating with others is freedom. Freedom is also being ready to take responsibility for one's actions and being able to act even though the majority dislikes it. Gandhi was a truly free man.
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