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Pandora
Cat Lady
Joined: Jun 18, 2005
Age: 47
Posts: 4684
Location: Townsville
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 Posted: Tue Nov 20, 2007 7:39 am Post subject: |
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| Kurtz wrote: | | Mystic wrote: | | What do you mean by this? Their anger didn't show you anything, they just hated your skills. |
Not at the time, no. But when I reflect back on my life using the skills, lenses and models I now possess, I can see that they held both myself and others down by negating our best traits.
So, when I discover that someone's a narcissistic dick, I can be relatively sure that when they go haywire on me it's because I'm right or they are feeling inferior. |
All this stuff about alpha males and evolution is pretty much bunk anyway.
_________________
Break out you Western girls,
Someday soon you're gonna rule the world.
Break out you Western girls,
Hold your heads up high.
"Western Girls" - Dragon
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Mystic
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Dec 10, 2006
Posts: 37
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| Posted: Tue Nov 20, 2007 1:12 pm Post subject: |
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| Kurtz wrote: | Not at the time, no. But when I reflect back on my life using the skills, lenses and models I now possess, I can see that they held both myself and others down by negating our best traits.
So, when I discover that someone's a narcissistic dick, I can be relatively sure that when they go haywire on me it's because I'm right or they are feeling inferior. |
That makes sense then. Good view to have of them.
I just thought of something I might do with the girl... get one of those candy rings, get down on one knee, and dramatically ask her to go to the dance she's constantly interrupted from going to. It might ruin any chance I have with her, but it'll at least be funny to see her face! |
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Kurtz
Velociraptor
Joined: Nov 07, 2007
Age: 28
Posts: 468
Location: End of the River
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| Posted: Tue Nov 20, 2007 6:14 pm Post subject: |
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| Pandora wrote: | | All this stuff about alpha males and evolution is pretty much bunk anyway. |
Then why can't you leave me alone?
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A son of fire should be forced to bow to a son of clay? |
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Pandora
Cat Lady
Joined: Jun 18, 2005
Age: 47
Posts: 4684
Location: Townsville
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| Posted: Wed Nov 21, 2007 6:56 am Post subject: |
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| Kurtz wrote: | | Pandora wrote: | | All this stuff about alpha males and evolution is pretty much bunk anyway. |
Then why can't you leave me alone? |
I never chased you but it does annoy me when people act like jerks and then blame it all on "selfish genes" (I'm not referring to you in particular; just people who act like selfish players. There aren't selfish genes but there is selfish behaviour.
Saying it is because of selfish genes suggests the person has NO control over their behaviour and choices but this is incorrect. They CAN decide to behave more reputably IF they really want to. If they don't want to, that's their choice but they shouldn't hide behind lame excuses such as "evolution".
_________________
Break out you Western girls,
Someday soon you're gonna rule the world.
Break out you Western girls,
Hold your heads up high.
"Western Girls" - Dragon
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Mystic
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Dec 10, 2006
Posts: 37
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| Posted: Wed Nov 21, 2007 2:34 pm Post subject: |
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| Pandora wrote: | I never chased you but it does annoy me when people act like jerks and then blame it all on "selfish genes" (I'm not referring to you in particular; just people who act like selfish players. There aren't selfish genes but there is selfish behaviour.
Saying it is because of selfish genes suggests the person has NO control over their behaviour and choices but this is incorrect. They CAN decide to behave more reputably IF they really want to. If they don't want to, that's their choice but they shouldn't hide behind lame excuses such as "evolution". |
If you were implying that I am blaming selfish genes for my unconscious behavior, you are wrong. I was blaming the genes for women (in general) not knowing what they really want or why they do some things (so some, not all of their behaviors). So I am blaming genes for how I decided to start behaving. Not because they are forcing me into anything.
I also never said the genes control what you think. They control what you feel, and if you tell me that you can not feel pain when you touch your hand to a hot stove, then I will believe that you are either crazy, abnormal, or you somehow have more control over your feelings than anyone I know. If you can convince me that you can make yourself feel love (not just affection) towards someone in particular, then I will believe I don't have to use what I've learned for you (it was never "on you," I don't plan to use this just to "get laid." I'm using it to have fun while I meet women and date). |
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techstepgenr8tion
cleveland audio assassin
Joined: Feb 07, 2005
Age: 28
Posts: 5402
Location: That's for me to know and for you to find out.
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| Posted: Sat Nov 24, 2007 6:39 am Post subject: |
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| Its just funny, every time my eyes scan by this topic heading I almost always think it says 'Julie Update' (ie. Juliekitty). |
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Anubis
Your thoughts are mine...
Joined: Sep 07, 2006
Age: 18
Posts: 13395
Location: The Kremlin
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| Posted: Thu Nov 29, 2007 6:32 pm Post subject: |
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Hmm, very clever and useful. My BIGGEST problem is actually approaching chicks and maintaining eye contact. From there, it's considerably easier. It's hard getting past that point. 
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KNOWLEDGE IS POWER |
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greenblue
¸.·´´¯`··.¸.·´
Joined: Mar 26, 2007
Posts: 7615
Location: Home
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| Posted: Mon Dec 03, 2007 12:00 am Post subject: |
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| Anubis wrote: | | Hmm, very clever and useful. My BIGGEST problem is actually approaching chicks and maintaining eye contact. From there, it's considerably easier. It's hard getting past that point. |
For me is everything, even online I can't make a good convsersation, or talk about something interesting, much less something romantic.
_________________
We all dream; we do not understand our dreams, yet we act as if nothing strange goes on in our sleep minds, strange at least by comparison with the logical, purposeful doings of our minds when we are awake. -Erich Fromm |
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Mystic
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Dec 10, 2006
Posts: 37
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| Posted: Wed Dec 05, 2007 12:32 pm Post subject: |
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| greenblue wrote: | | For me is everything, even online I can't make a good convsersation, or talk about something interesting, much less something romantic. |
Same here, I can't make good conversation, but I don't let that stop me from trying to become better at making conversation. I don't think you need to make romantic conversation, that might actually be a bad thing (unless you are teasing her about being too forward or wanting to get you into bed).
| Mystic wrote: | I just thought of something I might do with the girl... get one of those candy rings, get down on one knee, and dramatically ask her to go to the dance she's constantly interrupted from going to. It might ruin any chance I have with her, but it'll at least be funny to see her face!
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I did what I said, although instead of asking her to the dance lessons I asked her to a semi-formal dance. Didn't do it very dramatically and forgot to tell her that it was semi-formal, so she didn't have a clean dress to wear and didn't go, ): instead she went to a bar dance.
I still had a good time at the semi-formal, got an invalid email address and phone number (learned from it, so it was still a good experience... grinding and learning a name isn't enough to ask for more... which I should have known, it had just seemed like a good idea at the time...).
Now I feel like I need to decide how I want to act before continuing the attempts... but I seem to be having an easy time making my voice less nasally (I had decided I didn't like how I was talking when I went to a mock interview and heard myself without my brain making myself sound better). I have a month to figure it out at home where I probably won't be going out (small towns suck that way, especially since I'm somewhat tight with my money). |
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Pandora
Cat Lady
Joined: Jun 18, 2005
Age: 47
Posts: 4684
Location: Townsville
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| Posted: Thu Dec 13, 2007 6:38 am Post subject: |
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| Anubis wrote: | | Hmm, very clever and useful. My BIGGEST problem is actually approaching chicks and maintaining eye contact. From there, it's considerably easier. It's hard getting past that point. |
If you bend down, you can reach their eye level. I think that would be about 3 inches or so as little chickens aren't very tall. They are cute and fluffy though.
_________________
Break out you Western girls,
Someday soon you're gonna rule the world.
Break out you Western girls,
Hold your heads up high.
"Western Girls" - Dragon
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LePetitPrince
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 03, 2006
Age: 26
Posts: 3062
Location: Beirut , Lebanon
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| Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2007 12:23 pm Post subject: |
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| geez, you people are still milking this silly thread? |
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LePetitPrince
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 03, 2006
Age: 26
Posts: 3062
Location: Beirut , Lebanon
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| Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2007 12:27 pm Post subject: |
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Ok let's end this thread once and for all.
There's only 2 ways to be an alpha:
1-You are naturally-born alpha (handsome,tall, strong,healthy,good genes,confident....etc)
2-If you are not naturally-born alpha then you have to get fame ,success or big wealth in order to become something very similar to "alpha male".
[/end of thread] |
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Mystic
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Dec 10, 2006
Posts: 37
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| Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2007 12:57 pm Post subject: |
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| LePetitPrince wrote: | There's only 2 ways to be an alpha:
1-You are naturally-born alpha (handsome,tall, strong,healthy,good genes,confident....etc)
2-If you are not naturally-born alpha then you have to get fame ,success or big wealth in order to become something very similar to "alpha male".
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I agree that you have to be the best in the world to be the only true alpha, but to be the alpha of the room, you only need to attract the girls in the room.
| LePetitPrince wrote: | [/end of thread]
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Is that actually supposed to make people think this thread's over? Most people can't figure out how to use special features like quote (a lot because they never have used forums, some because they never try to). |
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CRACK
Phoenix
Joined: Nov 03, 2005
Age: 21
Posts: 765
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| Posted: Fri Dec 21, 2007 9:03 pm Post subject: |
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| I understand that its important to "be yourself" when seeking out a relationship. But what if "being yourself" means never initiating conversation and replying in mostly one word answers? |
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Mystic
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Dec 10, 2006
Posts: 37
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| Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2007 3:42 am Post subject: |
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| CRACK wrote: | | I understand that its important to "be yourself" when seeking out a relationship. But what if "being yourself" means never initiating conversation and replying in mostly one word answers? |
Then you change how you define "being yourself." You make it a point to either see why you do what you know isn't helping you at all, or you force yourself to just do it until it becomes a part of you "being yourself." If you find that it's how you feel, you break the chains of the memories that are causing you to feel that way, cheapest way to do that is replacing the memories with more helpful ones and not getting discouraged that you are forcing those memories to be made. If you can get the helpful memories with one group, you can then see that you can get it with other groups.
If you are afraid of what they'll say when you initiate conversation, you force yourself to initiate as many conversations as you can. Maybe start with people who are forced/paid to be friendly if required- waiters if you are afraid of both women and initiating conversations, waitresses if you realize women are men without the small y chromosome... a storekeeper if you don't want to just get personal very quickly... hopefully you see the point, I ran out of quick and boring examples  and figure you only need the standard 3.
If you just don't see the point of human interaction (aka random conversations), you force yourself to see that you can learn a lot of stuff you wouldn't normally just by not replying with one word answers (if you like learning new things), or see that you can experience feelings you wouldn't expect talking about the random things the conversation turns to (and the girl you should try to date will be the one to keep you laughing or entertained). |
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