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SierraBell
Velociraptor
Joined: Aug 24, 2007
Age: 16
Posts: 447
Location: On the mother earth in the USA
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 Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 11:35 pm Post subject: Feel that you will never get a gf or a bf? |
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I feel this way. I guess I'm too quiet and too shy or something, because I just seem to intimidate guys. Girls I'm definately okay with since they are my gender, but I'm really not a lesiban or even a bi.
So, does anyone feel like this?
Maybe we won't get our relationships we want until our teen-hood is over...I'm just guessing though... |
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Paladin_Cecil
Phoenix
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Joined: Feb 14, 2008
Posts: 629
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| Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 11:36 pm Post subject: |
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| I have an online boyfriend, 'cause I can't get one in real life. |
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SierraBell
Velociraptor
Joined: Aug 24, 2007
Age: 16
Posts: 447
Location: On the mother earth in the USA
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| Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 11:38 pm Post subject: |
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| Paladin_Cecil wrote: | | I have an online boyfriend, 'cause I can't get one in real life. |
Hmm, is he for real do you know?
I have been in the same situation where I met this guy online and he seemed "nice" and he told me that he loved me and all of that stuff, but I knew in my heart of heart something was wrong.
Sure enough, he was a lie.
Do you feel that way with your online boyfriend? |
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TheMidnightJudge
autist
Joined: Mar 29, 2007
Posts: 1312
Location: New England
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| Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 11:39 pm Post subject: |
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| I get my share of attention from females, and I'm learning how to react and understand things a litte. But, I have some serious prejudices and cynicism left over from the drama I went though to get over before I consider relationships. |
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Paladin_Cecil
Phoenix
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Joined: Feb 14, 2008
Posts: 629
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| Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 11:40 pm Post subject: |
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| SierraBell wrote: | | Hmm, is he for real do you know? |
I dunno... It's hard so hard for me to tell if people are for real online. I've dated around six guys online, and I still don't know if any of them were real... |
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SierraBell
Velociraptor
Joined: Aug 24, 2007
Age: 16
Posts: 447
Location: On the mother earth in the USA
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| Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 11:43 pm Post subject: |
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| Paladin_Cecil wrote: | | SierraBell wrote: | | Hmm, is he for real do you know? |
I dunno... It's hard so hard for me to tell if people are for real online. I've dated around six guys online, and I still don't know if any of them were real... |
What I'm wondering is, in your core of core, do you feel that something might be wrong with them? |
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Paladin_Cecil
Phoenix
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Joined: Feb 14, 2008
Posts: 629
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| Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 11:44 pm Post subject: |
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| SierraBell wrote: | | Paladin_Cecil wrote: | | SierraBell wrote: | | Hmm, is he for real do you know? |
I dunno... It's hard so hard for me to tell if people are for real online. I've dated around six guys online, and I still don't know if any of them were real... |
What I'm wondering is, in your core of core, do you feel that something might be wrong with them? |
Dunno... All people online seem real to me. =/ |
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matrix
Phoenix
Joined: Oct 07, 2007
Age: 18
Posts: 580
Location: between glitches
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| Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2008 12:15 am Post subject: |
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I just set some high mind standards like Brian from Family Guy.
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SierraBell
Velociraptor
Joined: Aug 24, 2007
Age: 16
Posts: 447
Location: On the mother earth in the USA
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| Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2008 12:29 am Post subject: |
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| matrix wrote: | | I just set some high mind standards like Brian from Family Guy. |
Dude, I set up very high standards in my life and all I got was disappointed... |
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886
Honking Antelope
Joined: Jan 16, 2008
Age: 18
Posts: 2694
Location: valley of the damned
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| Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2008 12:36 am Post subject: |
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Of course I never will. I'm way too goddamned shy and I fail to posess conversation starting skills. If I can't start a conversation no one will ever want to talk to me. =_=
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If Jesus died for my sins, then I should sin as much as possible, so he didn't die for nothing. |
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Wilco
Toucan
Joined: Jan 01, 2008
Age: 16
Posts: 281
Location: Netherlands, Noord-Holland
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| Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2008 1:21 am Post subject: |
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| 886 wrote: | | Of course I never will. I'm way too goddamned shy and I fail to posess conversation starting skills. If I can't start a conversation no one will ever want to talk to me. =_= |
I had this problem too  . But what helped for me is to not say anything for a day or two, and just listen to a conversation. How do they start one? Who starts what type of conversation?
I start all my conversations with questionts to people who talk alot, and like to talk alot. How was your weekend? How did your match go? Did you finish this or that? And once people like you, you'll be drawn into more, bigger conversations. I find those really hard because I never know when it's my turn to talk, but experience is the best teacher 
@SierraBell Have you ever tried to go somewhere with your girl friends, and let them take boy friends with them as well? You can go out in town and talk with new boys. If you go out a few times with the same group you'll really get to know them and maybe trough them you get to learn new boys, and mybe you'll be less shy around other boys. (maybe, idk because i'm not a girl) |
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SierraBell
Velociraptor
Joined: Aug 24, 2007
Age: 16
Posts: 447
Location: On the mother earth in the USA
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| Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2008 1:30 am Post subject: |
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| Wilco wrote: | | 886 wrote: | | Of course I never will. I'm way too goddamned shy and I fail to posess conversation starting skills. If I can't start a conversation no one will ever want to talk to me. =_= |
I had this problem too . But what helped for me is to not say anything for a day or two, and just listen to a conversation. How do they start one? Who starts what type of conversation?
I start all my conversations with questionts to people who talk alot, and like to talk alot. How was your weekend? How did your match go? Did you finish this or that? And once people like you, you'll be drawn into more, bigger conversations. I find those really hard because I never know when it's my turn to talk, but experience is the best teacher
@SierraBell Have you ever tried to go somewhere with your girl friends, and let them take boy friends with them as well? You can go out in town and talk with new boys. If you go out a few times with the same group you'll really get to know them and maybe trough them you get to learn new boys, and mybe you'll be less shy around other boys. (maybe, idk because i'm not a girl) |
Thanks, I actually find it better I got advice from a guy, because then I'll know what intimidates them and what doesn't.
Although just thinking about doing what you just sugguested scares the pants off me 
Last edited by SierraBell on Mon Feb 18, 2008 1:46 am; edited 3 times in total |
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Wilco
Toucan
Joined: Jan 01, 2008
Age: 16
Posts: 281
Location: Netherlands, Noord-Holland
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| Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2008 1:42 am Post subject: |
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I don't know how old you are, and I guess it's different from place to place, country to country. But here you would want the boys who ARE intimidated from the start. The ones who are a bit shy at first, try to make a few jokes, and just make a normal conversation. The ones who don't make a move, because they are the "nice guys" We all know what it means to be shy. And I'm sure every single person in the world feels shy every now and then. Which is why it's a good thing to go with some of your friends. You can sit back at first, and just come in with a few jokes or funny comments. You can talk with your friends to the boys if you know what I mean. And if you do it a few times with the group you'll all become one big group, and you'll feel more comfortable around those boys.
A friend of mine saw a girl (they are both NTs but still) in the gym. They talked, and just laughed and stuff like that. They gave each other their phone number. texted each other 100 times, and finally convinced they like each other. This shows that nothing happens when you first meet a boy. If he DOES make a move he's either:
Desperate,
Liking you alot immidiatly and couldn't wait.
A jerk
Something I have never seen. (you never know)
PS: Most boys act all cool and stuff, but later when the girls are gone they are very different. less confident, more... normal. which is why it's a good thing to become a friend to a few boys. so you see their "normal side"
Boys....  |
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mikebw
kyubi no kitsune
Joined: Sep 28, 2007
Age: 30
Posts: 1138
Location: Florida
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| Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2008 2:06 am Post subject: |
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I know I'll never have another girlfriend. I'm not actively competing with other dudes for any girls, I'm not "out there", I'm not looking and I'm not likely to be any time soon. Having a girlfriend is not a priority or a goal for my life, it's not something my happiness or my self value hinges on. Thankfully.
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The world under heaven, after a long period of division, tends to unite; after a long period of union, tends to divide. This has been so since antiquity. |
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Bluesummers
Benevolent Dreamer
Joined: Feb 13, 2008
Age: 22
Posts: 1178
Location: Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
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| Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2008 2:11 am Post subject: |
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I've managed to have one real relationship. So I guess it's not impossible. Currently trying to weirdly woo my way into another girl's heart at the moment.
Here's hoping I don't get close to her, get scared, and run away 
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