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Sally
Pileated woodpecker
Joined: Oct 30, 2007
Posts: 183
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 Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2008 10:20 am Post subject: Not getting jokes |
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i have read in several places that autistic people often do not realise people are joking & take what people say literally. this is true for me in some cases, but i have also noticed that on the occasion that i understand that someone is joking, i often find it difficult to communicate the fact that i realise that it is a joke & so people still think i am taking them literally! does anyone else find this?
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jonk
Deinonychus
Joined: Nov 18, 2007
Posts: 329
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| Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2008 10:45 am Post subject: Re: Not getting jokes |
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| Sally wrote: | | i have read in several places that autistic people often do not realise people are joking & take what people say literally. this is true for me in some cases, but i have also noticed that on the occasion that i understand that someone is joking, i often find it difficult to communicate the fact that i realise that it is a joke & so people still think i am taking them literally! does anyone else find this? |
I actually don't realize there is joke and take it seriously until that particular form eventually sinks in and then I can detect it later when it happens. There were some years where folks called me "Spock" because of this being such an extreme in me. If I got it, I usually don't respond in ways that fit their expected patterns, either -- perhaps choosing what I later am told is an inappropriate part of it and focusing on it in uncomfortable ways to them, for example. So that contributes, I suppose.
Jon
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Sora
f l y a w a y
Joined: Sep 16, 2006
Age: 21
Posts: 4734
Location: Europe
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| Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2008 10:59 am Post subject: Re: Not getting jokes |
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| Sally wrote: | | on the occasion that i understand that someone is joking, i often find it difficult to communicate the fact that i realise that it is a joke & so people still think i am taking them literally! |
I know this. I remember something well: My therapist said something like wanting to drive into the car before us to make it hurry up. I said, yeah, okay, you can do that, but first let me outta here! I meant to be funny, easing the tension of the situation by joking. I hate it how drivers get worked up about other drivers.
It took a few seconds to sink until she asked me whether I just took what she said literally. I said that no, I didn't, I tried to joke. She thought it was strange that I answered something to her statement, she thought it to be so strange she later explained to me that she can remember it even now, one whole year later.
I don't understand how what I said is any strange. I wanted to be social and pleasant by helping and all that the other person got of it was a sense of me doing something strange. |
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xyzyxx
Phoenix
Joined: Aug 08, 2007
Age: 23
Posts: 542
Location: Iowa, USA
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| Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2008 11:03 am Post subject: |
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Sometimes I don't realize when people are joking, sometimes I do. When I do, I have absolutely no clue how to respond to the joke.
My teacher said to me "you really need to do better on this test than your last one." I knew he was joking, as I got 97% score on my previous test. How should I respond to jokes like this?  |
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Chimchar
Deinonychus
Joined: Feb 15, 2008
Age: 19
Posts: 342
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| Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2008 11:22 am Post subject: |
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Heh, I used to have a hard time taking sarcasm well. Now I read books and taking it as it said.
I read this line on Canterbury Tales, that this knight "Took the maiden head"(Meaning he raped the poor woman) and when I read it I thought it was ......welll.... you know  (literally of course)
AS or high functioning autististics are usually concrete thinkers, meaning they just interpret things as being said rather than the NT's, abstract thinkers, meaning they interpret things and get an idea. |
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2ukenkerl
Phoenix
Joined: Jul 20, 2007
Posts: 6392
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| Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2008 1:07 pm Post subject: Re: Not getting jokes |
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| Sora wrote: | | Sally wrote: | | on the occasion that i understand that someone is joking, i often find it difficult to communicate the fact that i realise that it is a joke & so people still think i am taking them literally! |
I know this. I remember something well: My therapist said something like wanting to drive into the car before us to make it hurry up. I said, yeah, okay, you can do that, but first let me outta here! I meant to be funny, easing the tension of the situation by joking. I hate it how drivers get worked up about other drivers.
It took a few seconds to sink until she asked me whether I just took what she said literally. I said that no, I didn't, I tried to joke. She thought it was strange that I answered something to her statement, she thought it to be so strange she later explained to me that she can remember it even now, one whole year later.
I don't understand how what I said is any strange. I wanted to be social and pleasant by helping and all that the other person got of it was a sense of me doing something strange. |
I often joke the SAME way! A fair amount of the time, people think I am SERIOUS! Oh well, at times it is like "the boy who cried wolf"! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Boy_Who_Cried_Wolf as for getting worked up about other drivers, I am usually merely astonished and annoyed. I put blinkers on to try to discourage tailgaters, and try to avoid obvious idiots in front of me. |
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howzat
Phoenix
Joined: Aug 24, 2007
Age: 23
Posts: 988
Location: Hornsey North London
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| Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2008 3:17 pm Post subject: |
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| I was never good wid jokes. |
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AndersTheAspie
Angelic Knight
Joined: Feb 07, 2008
Age: 19
Posts: 1862
Location: On the edge of civilization. Denmark.
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| Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2008 3:45 pm Post subject: |
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I am pretty good at "getting" jokes, but there are times where they need a little time to sink in.
Usually this is when I don't expect a joke to be made, I expect my friends to joke around, but when my hairdresser does it...
Sometimes jokes can be hard to identify, simply because they are in no way funny, but as a general rule; if somebody says something that makes no sense, then it is probably a joke... or he is insane
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Once I knew everything, then I got smarter, now the only thing I know is that I know nothing.
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sarahstilettos
Phoenix
Joined: Sep 08, 2007
Age: 23
Posts: 852
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| Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2008 3:57 pm Post subject: Re: Not getting jokes |
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| Sally wrote: | | i have read in several places that autistic people often do not realise people are joking & take what people say literally. this is true for me in some cases, but i have also noticed that on the occasion that i understand that someone is joking, i often find it difficult to communicate the fact that i realise that it is a joke & so people still think i am taking them literally! does anyone else find this? |
Yes. On the rare occassions I 'get it', I then have the problem of working out how I am supposed to respond. Inevitably, I get it wrong, and people think I still haven't got the joke. Rahhh  |
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Viola
Velociraptor
Joined: Feb 24, 2008
Posts: 437
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| Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2008 4:01 pm Post subject: |
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Sometimes the best thing to do when you don't understand someone or know how to respond is just smile  . In most cases, that won't be taken offensively. I've also taught myself to quasi laugh on cue. It mostly consists of breathing out my nose (but hopefully not snorting), and smiling. I don't know if I would laugh more than once a week if I didn't do it artificially. |
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Age1600
Bonita-Azul
Joined: Apr 23, 2007
Posts: 2358
Location: New Jersey
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| Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2008 4:46 pm Post subject: |
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I'm horrible with jokes, sarcasm, all that, i always take them literally. Its even ten times worse when they dont change their voice or laugh afterwards, they seem so serious, i really dont know how nts seem to pick up on them haha.
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Dxed Classic Autism(moderate to severe as a child, now moderate to high functioning as an adult) & Dxed Tourette Syndrome... 
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markaudette
Phoenix
Joined: Oct 16, 2006
Posts: 702
Location: Middle Tennessee, USA
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| Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2008 6:44 pm Post subject: |
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I almost never, EVER realize when someone's making a joke. Not unless the telegraph it so loud people in the International Space Station can hear it.
Just the other day my fiance's father made a joke while we were looking at bicycles. He made a coment about riding bikes and I thought he meant my fiance should get on that d\seat and have a ride with me. And Isaid "I'd love it if she took up riding the bicycle with me!" And that wasn't what he was talking about. My fiance and I don't have any children yet and his comment was a very much less than subtle hint at getting to work at making him some grandchildren.
And I never got a single second of the joke. My fiance had to explain it to me later and I felt so damn embarrassed that I wish I could have crawled under a rock. I'm not stupid. I'd like to consider myself a little bright. But I almost never get when people are joking with me. It's humiliating.
Oh, and forget me actually TELLING a joke! Just forget it. |
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Spokane_Girl
There's no crying in baseball
Joined: Jul 17, 2007
Age: 24
Posts: 8654
Location: Rockford (hometown Oregon)
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| Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2008 8:18 pm Post subject: |
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I take lot of things literal and don't understand humor or jokes. I do sometimes though but lot of the times I don't. I don't catch sarcasm either but I do sometimes.
I often get told "I'm joking" or "It was a joke" "I'm teasing" etc.
Because I am a serious person, people don't know I am joking or being sarcastic when I do it so I am always telling them I was.
My ex boyfriend was always doing sarcasm and humor and it bugged me because I could not take him seriously. It was real frustrating and he never respected me about it. He just kept doing it. I hate people like that.
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JerryHatake
Mason Athletics Super Fan Enough Said
Joined: Jul 02, 2006
Age: 21
Posts: 10896
Location: Woodbridge, VA
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| Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2008 8:25 pm Post subject: |
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Happened to me for a while but I get some jokes now more lol.
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KimJ
Legend in my own mind
Joined: Jun 11, 2006
Posts: 2540
Location: Arizona
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| Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2008 10:28 pm Post subject: |
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| I get jokes but I have a hard time with deadpan sarcasm. I get satire which seems difficult for both NTs and Aspies. I can do deadpan sarcasm really well, I just can't read it in others. Usually because there is some hard truth in it. |
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