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SilverProteus
The years, no doubt, have changed me.
Joined: Jul 21, 2007
Posts: 7154
Location: Fleet Street.
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 Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 11:44 am Post subject: What jokes have you taken literally? |
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Not just jokes, but idioms, proverbs, short stories, child's songs, poems, anecdotes...anything.  I would love to read your stories.
Do you like to point out logical fallacies in things and annoy NTs? Have you had any comic experiences where someone tried to explain something you took literally?
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DevonB
Raven
Joined: Mar 14, 2008
Posts: 118
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| Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 11:56 am Post subject: Stupid joke |
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This one stumped me for more than two years because I wouldn't ask anyone to explain it to me....
A man was walking down the street...he meets another man who says...
"I just saw a man eating shark at the aquarium"
The first man replies, "so what? I just saw a man eating tuna at the deli."
As I said...it took me years....and then when I finally got it...I was rolling on the floor. It's still one of my favourite jokes.
I love puns. I also hear things incorrectly all the time, and don't wonder why they're odd....I assume they are correct until someone points out that I've repeated the incorrect words that I've heard...broken telephone. It's resulted in some funny situations...eventually. |
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silentchaos
Sea Gull
Joined: Mar 08, 2008
Posts: 249
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| Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 11:56 am Post subject: |
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Constantly, although i do generally understand the idea behind the joke/proverb/whatever i cant stand it when they make no sense. I annoy people by pointing out the problems with them from time to time. =/
"The world is just like that" or "That's just how the world works, we cant change it" when referring to something that has NOTHING at all to do with the world but people instead. Two faced politicians have nothing to do with the 'world' that is society and humanity.
"Like sucks" "That's life for you" etc when again it has nothing to do with any property of life but instead is a problem caused by humans.
Whenever someone calls someone that lies,cheats,is cruel etc a snake. I have yet to be cheated,lied to,taken advantage of, harassed or anything else by any snake. In fact at least most snakes probably lack the required brain facilities for cruelty,intentional deceit, etc.
"Science is a religion" If one more person says that to me and is unable to define religion or science, my head may explode. |
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AndersTheAspie
Angelic Knight
Joined: Feb 07, 2008
Age: 17
Posts: 1862
Location: On the edge of civilization. Denmark.
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| Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 12:09 pm Post subject: |
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Most Idioms I know are in danish, and as part of the definition I can't really explain them, but let me try anyway:
To speak about your sick aunt. This apparently means to make excuses for yourself... that took me a while to wrap my head around.
I (Almost) always catch jokes, but every now and then they slip past me (When I am not expecting jokes mostly) At the hairdresser, my mother and I were both getting a haircut. I was finished first and said; "Do you want me to waite for you to be finished, or should I get going home?" my mother replied "Just go, it will be to boring for you to just sit around waiting" Then the hairdresser said "Well we will just have to put him to work so he won't get bored"
That caught me off guard, I had time to go through all the things she could possibly put me at work with before I realised that she was ofcourse joking.
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Once I knew everything, then I got smarter, now the only thing I know is that I know nothing.
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Irulan
The Borg Queen
Joined: May 18, 2007
Age: 24
Posts: 1523
Location: Poland
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| Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 12:20 pm Post subject: Re: Stupid joke |
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| DevonB wrote: |
A man was walking down the street...he meets another man who says...
"I just saw a man eating shark at the aquarium"
The first man replies, "so what? I just saw a man eating tuna at the deli."
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So might you be so nice as to explain this joke to me? I'm not sure if I get it 
Speaking of fish and jokes I didn't understand at some point, I recall such a one: A blind man enters the doors of fishmonger's place and says:"Hi, girls" 
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Rowena Ravenclaw
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SilverProteus
The years, no doubt, have changed me.
Joined: Jul 21, 2007
Posts: 7154
Location: Fleet Street.
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| Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 12:24 pm Post subject: Re: Stupid joke |
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| Irulan wrote: | | DevonB wrote: |
A man was walking down the street...he meets another man who says...
"I just saw a man eating shark at the aquarium"
The first man replies, "so what? I just saw a man eating tuna at the deli."
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So might you be so nice as to explain this joke to me? I'm not sure if I get it |
Hmmm...My guess would be: eating tuna at the deli is dangerous as in health hazard.
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Satellite
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Mar 14, 2008
Posts: 63
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| Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 12:40 pm Post subject: Re: Stupid joke |
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| Irulan wrote: | | DevonB wrote: |
A man was walking down the street...he meets another man who says...
"I just saw a man eating shark at the aquarium"
The first man replies, "so what? I just saw a man eating tuna at the deli."
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So might you be so nice as to explain this joke to me? I'm not sure if I get it
Speaking of fish and jokes I didn't understand at some point, I recall such a one: A blind man enters the doors of fishmonger's place and says:"Hi, girls" |
Read "a man eating shark" as "a man who was eating shark", and you'll probably get it.
I, on the other hand, don't get the fishmonger joke. |
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demoluca
Toucan
Joined: Nov 17, 2007
Posts: 296
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| Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 12:41 pm Post subject: |
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i get most humour except for sarcasm.>->
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Irulan
The Borg Queen
Joined: May 18, 2007
Age: 24
Posts: 1523
Location: Poland
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| Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 12:47 pm Post subject: Re: Stupid joke |
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| Satellite wrote: | | Irulan wrote: | | DevonB wrote: |
A man was walking down the street...he meets another man who says...
"I just saw a man eating shark at the aquarium"
The first man replies, "so what? I just saw a man eating tuna at the deli."
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So might you be so nice as to explain this joke to me? I'm not sure if I get it
Speaking of fish and jokes I didn't understand at some point, I recall such a one: A blind man enters the doors of fishmonger's place and says:"Hi, girls" |
Read "a man eating shark" as "a man who was eating shark", and you'll probably get it.
I, on the other hand, don't get the fishmonger joke. |
Even though I'm not famous for a sense of humor, I sniggered having heard the explanation 
As for the joke posted by me, it's squicky and refers to the fact that private parts of female anatomy are claimed to excrete fish smell if a woman doesn't take care of their hygiene. The blind man thought there were such women in the shop.
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"Wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure."
Rowena Ravenclaw
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victorvndoom
Sea Gull
Joined: Mar 20, 2008
Age: 40
Posts: 234
Location: europe: belgium
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| Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 12:52 pm Post subject: |
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april fool jokes , hate that day
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sorry for been rude sometimes or emotionless or hurting feelings ; i got as for something
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littlefrog
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Mar 18, 2008
Age: 40
Posts: 48
Location: Connecticut
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| Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 1:08 pm Post subject: |
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| i think i have a pretty good sense of humor, i don't get the shark joke .. when i was 10 i remember my mother telling me that someone's car needed to get towed to the garage to get fixed, and i remember thinking, why would anyone try to pull a car with their toes all the way across town?? i was very confused. when i asked my question i was laughed at, so i didn't ask so many question anymore. not a good joke example, but i did take a lot of things literally. sometimes i still do .. very embarrassing. |
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LostInEmulation
Phoenix
Joined: Feb 11, 2008
Posts: 567
Location: Germany
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| Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 2:05 pm Post subject: |
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There are many things, which I did not understand. Mostly idiomatic expressions in German (I sometimes feel more confident in English, because I can look things up for English and not get strange looks). 'to come too short' (zu kurz kommen) in German apparently means not to get the fair share and I learned about that in Gymnasium. Also, my father has the horrible habit of using things sarcastically if he is angry. I always thought 'Schon dich!' was one of the most drastic things, you can say to a person so s/he starts working. I only learned it when I told my grandparents what horrible things my father told my mother... 
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I am no native speaker. Please contact me, if I made grammatical mistakes in the posting above.
about me:
<Mikoangelo> you were there
<Mikoangelo> you confuse by design  |
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serenity
Phoenix
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Joined: Feb 26, 2007
Age: 29
Posts: 555
Location: Kansas
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| Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 2:36 pm Post subject: |
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Last Friday I was at one of those Japanese steakhouses where they cook the food on a large grill right in front of you. They also tell jokes, and do tricks while they're cooking. Right before the cook lit the grill with a big flame he asked if anyone was wearing hairspray. I took him seriously, and moved away from the table, kinda freaking out. My husband grabbed me by the arm, and whispered "he's just kidding honey." I was so embarrassed.  |
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craola
Snowy Owl
Joined: Mar 21, 2008
Age: 20
Posts: 145
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| Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 3:09 pm Post subject: |
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I always ask questions about things and people think im joking and they laugh at me and I have to say no, im serious, what is it or what does it mean, it drives me crazy.
What have I taken seriously...a lot of films i've asked if its a true story and funny, funny people have said yes and I believed them not picking up on their sarcasm. I've learnt sarcasm now although I can really only use extreme sarcasm.
I can't really think of any examples at the second although I did not get either joke. My joke skills are appalling, my very favourite, probably because I got it almost straight away is-
What did the cross eyed teacher say?
I can't control my pupils! |
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Jeyradan
Deinonychus
Joined: Jan 17, 2008
Posts: 329
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| Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 3:17 pm Post subject: |
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I have a friend who is always saying things that are absurd and thus obviously jokes. That is, they are that way to HIM. I almost always have to ask, "Are you joking? You're joking, right?" And sometimes he messes me about a bit (that's okay, as long as he stops when I tell him it's really serious) and says yes, no, yes... and I have to go, "No, you have to tell me seriously now, I don't get it. Is it a joke?" Then I get my answer (and he's nice and explains why).
Edit: I just remembered a conversation I had with the girls next door [ages 11, 11, 11 and 14] yesterday. They wanted to show me some episodes of a funny cartoon they had found on YouTube. Then they hesitated and one said, "Well, WE think it's funny. You're probably just going to point out all the reasons why it isn't funny or doesn't make sense. But let's watch it anyway," and another one said, "You'll probably think it's weird."
I laughed at the show and didn't say anything. It WAS weird. But I never realized until then that I came off this way with humor. I didn't know that was a problem I had.
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"Can you imagine how liberating it would be to live a life free of all the mind-numbing social niceties?"
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