Josie
Phoenix
Joined: Apr 26, 2008
Posts: 645
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 Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 1:44 pm Post subject: Yelling |
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| Do people ever accuse you of yelling when your not? |
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samantca
Velociraptor
Joined: Apr 09, 2008
Age: 27
Posts: 459
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| Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 2:40 pm Post subject: |
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| My boyfriend sometimes say i sound angry when im not at all. I tend to raise my voice a lot when i get excited about something. Maybe i sound angry too, i dont really know. |
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ButchCoolidge
Velociraptor
Joined: Sep 23, 2006
Posts: 471
Location: New York, New York
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| Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 2:46 pm Post subject: |
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| Yeah it's happened several times, although it's not a regular thing. I tend to raise subconsciously the volume of my voice when I get excited. |
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sgrannel
Just Vic
Joined: Feb 21, 2008
Posts: 2101
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| Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 2:48 pm Post subject: |
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Yes, I know a guy who was kind enough to this point out. I try not to do this now, but if my concentration is taken up in some difficult problem, or my enthusiasm for something starts to run away, then it comes back a bit. I have a certain intensity that I enjoy when I experience it, but I know now that sometimes others are put off by it.
I have spent the last year away from socializing to gather my thoughts and write my PhD thesis. My outward behaviors were worst when all of my concentration was on constructing the lab equipment for my thesis work. I have also taken time to process years of experience and draw any lessons I can from it.
My enthusiasm for sharing the details of my work, and talking too loud, probably had something to do with not forming very close relationships with other people at the sailing club. Other people would have already arranged partners for using the boats when they arrive, and years after joining I would still have to hunt for a partner, usually one of the new members.
For whatever reason people are put off when you share too much about what you know, either because it scares them or because it makes them feel inadequate (?). I have known people in high places (deans!) that have had trouble understanding me, and it made me secretly wonder how that person got to be where he is without being able to understand my field of discussion. I now think that the success of some people depends on being smooth, looking good, and being skillful at concealing what they know so others aren't put off by it.
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A boy and his dog sometimes talk to each other
A boy and a dog can be happy sitting down in the woods on a log
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mikebw
kyubi no kitsune
Joined: Sep 28, 2007
Age: 34
Posts: 1522
Location: Florida
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| Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 3:10 pm Post subject: |
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It's happened once or twice.
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Jeyradan
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Joined: Jan 17, 2008
Posts: 514
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| Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 3:17 pm Post subject: |
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Yes - my father always used to tell me I was yelling. I wasn't; my voice was actually quite soft. But I was speaking so fast and with such intensity that he called it "yelling."
However, I also do sometimes yell without meaning to - as in, I raise my voice more than is necessary. I don't realize as I am doing it, or rarely, but as soon as it is pointed out I am suddenly acutely aware of it. I don't mean to yell, though; I just get so into it that my voice rises. Oddly, though, when I'm with someone who is as enthusiastic or interested as I am, I don't yell. Wonder why?
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sgrannel
Just Vic
Joined: Feb 21, 2008
Posts: 2101
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| Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 3:34 pm Post subject: |
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| Jeyradan wrote: | Yes - my father always used to tell me I was yelling. I wasn't; my voice was actually quite soft. But I was speaking so fast and with such intensity that he called it "yelling."
However, I also do sometimes yell without meaning to - as in, I raise my voice more than is necessary. I don't realize as I am doing it, or rarely, but as soon as it is pointed out I am suddenly acutely aware of it. I don't mean to yell, though; I just get so into it that my voice rises. Oddly, though, when I'm with someone who is as enthusiastic or interested as I am, I don't yell. Wonder why? |
So yelling is a relative thing, and the perception of it is indicative of a difference in interest in the thing being discussed.
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A boy and his dog can go walking
A boy and his dog sometimes talk to each other
A boy and a dog can be happy sitting down in the woods on a log
But a dog knows his boy can go wrong |
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Ryn
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Joined: Apr 10, 2008
Posts: 512
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| Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 3:40 pm Post subject: |
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When I get excited my Mom looks harshly at me and tells me I'm yelling or that I'm being shrill. I tell her I'm not doing on purpose and that I'm sorry, but she says I do it on purpose. 
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2ukenkerl
Phoenix
Joined: Jul 20, 2007
Posts: 6931
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| Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 3:46 pm Post subject: |
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| Yeah, I have the SAME problem. 8-( |
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Chibi_Neko
Want a Cookie
Joined: Oct 24, 2007
Age: 30
Posts: 1884
Location: Newfoundland, Canada
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| Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 4:24 pm Post subject: |
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Nope... never had that issue.
My mom talks very loudly especially on the phone. It borderlines yelling and I either have to tell her to talk softer, or I just turn the phone volume down.
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Brandon-J
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Joined: Mar 12, 2008
Age: 24
Posts: 729
Location: North Carolina, USA
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| Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 5:44 pm Post subject: |
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| Nah i usually talk low and people have to tell me to say it again or speak louder. |
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Aalto
Phoenix
Joined: May 04, 2008
Age: 21
Posts: 582
Location: W. Yorks, UK
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| Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 5:46 pm Post subject: |
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| I'd love to have more voice control. Recently I've been sounding overly angry which I don't appreciate at all, saying how much I abhor that emotion. I've been accused of it a lot by my mom, though I clearly haven't been. |
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2ukenkerl
Phoenix
Joined: Jul 20, 2007
Posts: 6931
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| Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 6:06 pm Post subject: |
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| Brandon-J wrote: | | Nah i usually talk low and people have to tell me to say it again or speak louder. |
I have THAT problem ALSO! 8-( |
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Zonder
Give me a minute, I'm thinking.
Joined: Feb 23, 2008
Posts: 1241
Location: Sitting on my sofa.
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| Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 7:58 pm Post subject: |
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I hardly ever yell, even when I'm angry. I get all steamed up and have trouble controlling the waver of my voice, but I don't raise the volume.
Z |
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Liverbird
Using my evil powers for good!
Joined: Jun 14, 2007
Posts: 1180
Location: My heart belongs to Anfield
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| Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 8:02 pm Post subject: |
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I get accused of being screechy all the time. I tend to just get louder when I'm feeling stressed and I don't generally realise it. But I'm usually about half way to meltdown by the time this happens, so I don't really care at all. My husband always says that I'm getting screechy when I get stressed. He tells me don't yell at me all the time and I generally end up shouting back that I'm not yelling. Funny, huh?
I don't have any control over when it happens or how it happens, though. I just realise this and know that it's part of me.
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