Joined: Jan 29, 2008 Age: 27 Posts: 1041 Location: Arizona
Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 2:08 am Post subject:
hartzofspace wrote:
Mothers Day, to me, is the most ridiculous load of horse sh** that was ever conceived of. I read about the history of it, (forgot the guy's name) but all it ever does is depress me and fill me with anger and despair. I guess the Mom in "Leave it to Beaver" might enjoy such a holiday, but not me. I won't go into it, since I have been enjoying the bantering here so much. I am just glad that this silly day is over.
Hartz, I think I speak for everyone here when I say we love having you here. _________________ Bill Cosby: Dad is great! Give us the chocolate cake!
Joined: Apr 15, 2005 Posts: 3636 Location: In the basement, with the 'nomalies
Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 4:43 pm Post subject:
morning_after wrote:
hartzofspace wrote:
Mothers Day, to me, is the most ridiculous load of horse sh** that was ever conceived of. I read about the history of it, (forgot the guy's name) but all it ever does is depress me and fill me with anger and despair. I guess the Mom in "Leave it to Beaver" might enjoy such a holiday, but not me. I won't go into it, since I have been enjoying the bantering here so much. I am just glad that this silly day is over.
Hartz, I think I speak for everyone here when I say we love having you here.
Thank you, morning_after! _________________ "However gradual it looks from here, look if you like, but you will have to leap."
Joined: Feb 09, 2008 Age: 61 Posts: 115 Location: Southeast
Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 5:47 pm Post subject: Chewing too loud
I was asked by my lovely partner of thirty-three years to inquire about something that drives her crazy. The issue is a little complex in that, although she does not have ASD, she is clearly an NA (that's neuro-Atypical). She has as many sensory issues as I do (perhaps more) but they stem from dyslexia and ADD.
That said, my lovely lady has bade me ask whether "chewing loudly" is common among folks on the spectrum. I'm not talking about chewing with mouth open but rather somehow making "too much" sound when eating a crunchy food. I try constantly to avoid chewing crunchy things around her but there are always unavoidable situations. Try as I might, I am often only aware of my behavior after she points it out with a wince on her face (I'm sure it is physically uncomfortable for her). I am talking about such things as the sounds from seeds in figs or strawberries causing her to jump or flinch. Something like chips is unbearable but maybe more understandable.
So I guess the question is how much I may be crunching obliviously and how much her physical sensitivity contributes to it. The difficulty I have eliminating the behavior is a red flag to me that autism may play a hand. Things which bother those around me that are NOT based in my autism have always been relatively easy to eliminate from my repertoire. With her sensitivity, however, it may be that I am oblivious because the sound is next to nothing for everyone but her.
Joined: Apr 15, 2005 Posts: 3636 Location: In the basement, with the 'nomalies
Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 6:13 pm Post subject:
I am so furious! I just called the IRS, and it seems that someone made a mistake with my return. Meaning that even though I provided them with my bank info for an electronic deposit, they processed it for a paper check. Meaning that, instead of getting my stimulus payment this week, it won't arrive for another two months!
I have a dental situation that I need to deal with ASAP, and was counting on getting it taken care of this week. _________________ "However gradual it looks from here, look if you like, but you will have to leap."
Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 6:34 pm Post subject: Re: Chewing too loud
skeeterhawk wrote:
So I guess the question is how much I may be crunching obliviously and how much her physical sensitivity contributes to it. The difficulty I have eliminating the behavior is a red flag to me that autism may play a hand. Things which bother those around me that are NOT based in my autism have always been relatively easy to eliminate from my repertoire. With her sensitivity, however, it may be that I am oblivious because the sound is next to nothing for everyone else
My advice is to get smart and eat under a "cone of silence". Kidding aside, I have the same sensitivity as your partner and it drives me nuts at time. I only say something to someone else at the table if they are eating with their mouths open and they are family. Otherwise, I grin and bear it. I make the assumption that if I eat crunchy food with my mouth closed, I make as much noise as other people even though it does not sound intense to the chewer>
Joined: Jan 29, 2008 Age: 27 Posts: 1041 Location: Arizona
Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 8:37 pm Post subject: Re: Chewing too loud
skeeterhawk wrote:
I was asked by my lovely partner of thirty-three years to inquire about something that drives her crazy. The issue is a little complex in that, although she does not have ASD, she is clearly an NA (that's neuro-Atypical). She has as many sensory issues as I do (perhaps more) but they stem from dyslexia and ADD.
That said, my lovely lady has bade me ask whether "chewing loudly" is common among folks on the spectrum. I'm not talking about chewing with mouth open but rather somehow making "too much" sound when eating a crunchy food. I try constantly to avoid chewing crunchy things around her but there are always unavoidable situations. Try as I might, I am often only aware of my behavior after she points it out with a wince on her face (I'm sure it is physically uncomfortable for her). I am talking about such things as the sounds from seeds in figs or strawberries causing her to jump or flinch. Something like chips is unbearable but maybe more understandable.
So I guess the question is how much I may be crunching obliviously and how much her physical sensitivity contributes to it. The difficulty I have eliminating the behavior is a red flag to me that autism may play a hand. Things which bother those around me that are NOT based in my autism have always been relatively easy to eliminate from my repertoire. With her sensitivity, however, it may be that I am oblivious because the sound is next to nothing for everyone but her.
Any thoughts out there?
Well, if it helps you, I will point out that I have read books where nuerotypical parents of aspie children have had the same problem.
Sometimes you cannot eliminate the thing (whatever it is) that causes bothersome noises for the child.
So, what the book suggested was keeping it to a minimum, and when you have to do it, let the person know so that they can go into another room for a while.
For example, in this case, you might try not to eat anything crunchy around her, maybe even taking them into another room or something, if you can. Otherwise, if you have to eat something crunchy (like, say, you're at a restaurant and you cannot avoid ordering something crunchy), then warn her, saying you're about to eat something really crunchy and that she might need to go away for a little while and join you in a few minutes.
Just my thoughts. _________________ Bill Cosby: Dad is great! Give us the chocolate cake!
Joined: Jan 29, 2008 Age: 27 Posts: 1041 Location: Arizona
Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 8:39 pm Post subject:
hartzofspace wrote:
I am so furious! I just called the IRS, and it seems that someone made a mistake with my return. Meaning that even though I provided them with my bank info for an electronic deposit, they processed it for a paper check. Meaning that, instead of getting my stimulus payment this week, it won't arrive for another two months!
I have a dental situation that I need to deal with ASAP, and was counting on getting it taken care of this week.
Awww, I'm sorry to hear about your situation. I really am.
Do you suppose you could have the dentist mail you his bill? Or are you having trouble with the money you have to have before you get there? _________________ Bill Cosby: Dad is great! Give us the chocolate cake!
Joined: Apr 15, 2005 Posts: 3636 Location: In the basement, with the 'nomalies
Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 10:00 pm Post subject:
morning_after wrote:
hartzofspace wrote:
I am so furious! I just called the IRS, and it seems that someone made a mistake with my return. Meaning that even though I provided them with my bank info for an electronic deposit, they processed it for a paper check. Meaning that, instead of getting my stimulus payment this week, it won't arrive for another two months!
I have a dental situation that I need to deal with ASAP, and was counting on getting it taken care of this week.
Awww, I'm sorry to hear about your situation. I really am.
Do you suppose you could have the dentist mail you his bill? Or are you having trouble with the money you have to have before you get there?
I haven't incurred a bill yet. I wanted to have the money up front, before I have any dental work done. _________________ "However gradual it looks from here, look if you like, but you will have to leap."
Joined: Jun 21, 2006 Age: 44 Posts: 4973 Location: Village of the Damned
Posted: Tue May 13, 2008 1:24 am Post subject:
Hartz.....Perhaps you can call your dentist and explain the situation. My dentist( a real saint, me thinks), has often offered to do work and bill me, but I have been going there for years and had tons of root canals and caps...so he does make more money on me then some less "dentally challenged". They also offer a bank loan that is free if paid off in 6 months. You can ask if your dentist has something like that....many of them will work with you, as they are used to waiting for insurence company payments,(half the time, mine takes months to pay off their share) Good luck. Don't wait if you can avoid it because it is likely to just cost more if it turns abcess. (I have to go in this week and pay another couple hundred dollars just for a filling). It hurts twice as much when you have to pay for someone to "hurt you"...what a racket...but sure is noce still having teeth ...my mom had all hers pulled by 40
I also hate mouth sounds...my own or my BF, (the only other person I eat around. I don't mind his crunching unless I am trying to watch TV...that drives me nuts because of APD. What I really hate is "wet mouth noises"...yuck. Irrational but I just can not stand that sound. I was so self concious of my own eating noises when I was a kid that I refused to eat around peers in Jr High, High School and even at my prom (yes, someone did ask me to prom...they thought they were gettign laid...HA)...On the up-side...it kept me thin and I was a pretty cheap date _________________ Just because one plane is flying out of formation, doesnt mean the formation is on course....R.D.Lang
Joined: Jun 21, 2006 Age: 44 Posts: 4973 Location: Village of the Damned
Posted: Tue May 13, 2008 3:04 am Post subject:
Merle...I don't know how you stayed so calm when dealing with slowmutant(was his name a clue?) He had me seeing red and I wanted to explode on him but I didn't want to intrude...I have a bad habit of playing unwanted Calvary that has gotten me in trouble before...so I bit my tongue. I wish I knew how to deal with my temper with these type of people here and IRL. It would serve me well, but I am afraid I have a long way to go in learning how to stay above thi kind of mentality...I thought aspies were supposed to be "rational" but I am any thing but when someone like slowmutant responds to people with such ignorance and seemingly intentional cruelty.
KUDO's on your self control and rational response. _________________ Just because one plane is flying out of formation, doesnt mean the formation is on course....R.D.Lang
Joined: Nov 22, 2006 Age: 57 Posts: 7523 Location: Oregon, USA
Posted: Tue May 13, 2008 3:21 am Post subject:
krex wrote:
Merle...I don't know how you stayed so calm when dealing with slowmutant(was his name a clue?) He had me seeing red and I wanted to explode on him but I didn't want to intrude...I have a bad habit of playing unwanted Calvary that has gotten me in trouble before...so I bit my tongue. I wish I knew how to deal with my temper with these type of people here and IRL. It would serve me well, but I am afraid I have a long way to go in learning how to stay above thi kind of mentality...I thought aspies were supposed to be "rational" but I am any thing but when someone like slowmutant responds to people with such ignorance and seemingly intentional cruelty.
KUDO's on your self control and rational response.
I am Irony incarnate, Krex. There is no crown as thorny. I find when I am rational in one venue I am out of control in others. But thanks. sometimes you catch more flies with honey but sometimes you gotta bring out the swatter and kill the damn flies.
Merle _________________ The economy is getting so bad my dog is worried.
Alpo is up to $4.00 USD a can and that is $12.00 USD in dog dollars!
Joined: Mar 02, 2006 Posts: 3077 Location: left coast
Posted: Tue May 13, 2008 12:09 pm Post subject:
SleepyDragon wrote:
Anyone spoken to Postie lately?
Not in about a week or so. He was alive and kicking at last word.... _________________ Novinson's Revolutionary Discovery: When comes the revolution, things will be different - not better, just different.
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...my mom had all hers pulled by 40 
