zeldapsychology
Phoenix
Joined: May 05, 2008
Age: 27
Posts: 3200
Location: Florida
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 Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 10:23 pm Post subject: Is this a good Socializing plan? |
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I was thinking of trying to not be myself for example usually in College I would say that's easy etc. so should I say ya man question 4 was hard (when really it wasn't?) Perhaps if I get a research paper done early turn it in to the teacher AND ONLY THE TEACHER! (So there's no whispering of look at her how did she get her paper done etc.) My old College behavior was as if going to a theme park filled with excitment so people expected my joking behavior would equal me failing I come in the next day with my paper done. Also with trying to appease the Basic Student have them choose a movie we watch in class and make a game out of it if the teacher would let me. What are your thoughts? I'm trying to come to terms with my own behaviors but I want to be sure since at my first job Sexaul Harrassment got brought up and I was suspended from College ( I think due to my Obsessive behavior of bugging the teacher every day+e-mails.  |
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caramateo
Toucan
Joined: Sep 19, 2007
Posts: 290
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| Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 10:30 pm Post subject: |
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I would not advise you to do that.
be yourself.
just don't show others your obsessions and try to learn what is called" appropriate" and act like it
don't get yourself punished |
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pakled
"Bless his Heart"
Joined: Nov 13, 2007
Age: 55
Posts: 7827
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| Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 10:36 pm Post subject: |
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| they're worried enough about that. Self-control is a good thing to practice, too.. |
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zeldapsychology
Phoenix
Joined: May 05, 2008
Age: 27
Posts: 3200
Location: Florida
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| Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 10:57 pm Post subject: |
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| AHHHH! Acting appropiate is CRAZY!!!! LOL! When my behavior was reprimanded at work I'd try to change and come of as depressed. Also I don't know what "Appropiate" is. Going to class sitting down taking notes and leaving?!!! (that's my family's view) it's just I can't help it!!! UHHHHH! Thanks for the tips sadly IMO all being myself has done is gotten me into trouble. Oh well I guess things take time. (although I don't want to obsess on appropiate behavior) LOL!!!!!!!! |
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Alexey
Raven
Joined: Jan 25, 2008
Posts: 117
Location: Moscow, Russia
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| Posted: Tue May 13, 2008 12:38 pm Post subject: |
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| zeldapsychology wrote: | | Going to class sitting down taking notes and leaving?!!! (that's my family's view) it's just I can't help it!!! |
It is only the first part of appropriate behaviour  . The second part is making small conversations with another students (if it is hard to "invent" topic, you may begin from something "about learning" and change topic to something "about life"), e.g. during the free time between lessons, some socialization with them after classes. May be it is obvious and natural for your parents (but it was not "natural" for me at school). |
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zeldapsychology
Phoenix
Joined: May 05, 2008
Age: 27
Posts: 3200
Location: Florida
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| Posted: Tue May 13, 2008 2:59 pm Post subject: |
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I tend to obsess over people sometimes I think. Call them constantly,jump around them (I used to jump on my coworkers back) (Don't ask I'm kind of crazy like that it's something I can't put into words.) With my Psychology teacher I'd go to her office daily and then it extended to e-mailing her every family joke I get so I understand where she'd have an issue as a Pscyhologist (HELL I would have an issue and I'm NOT a Psychologist!!!)  |
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Alexey
Raven
Joined: Jan 25, 2008
Posts: 117
Location: Moscow, Russia
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| Posted: Tue May 13, 2008 3:55 pm Post subject: |
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| Zeldapsychology wrote: | | I tend to obsess over people sometimes I think. Call them constantly,jump around them (I used to jump on my coworkers back) (Don't ask I'm kind of crazy like that it's something I can't put into words.) |
Socialization and communication assumes DIALOGUE. It is more effective to be less active but more interested in another people, especially in their verbal and emotional responses. If you will listen to another people, it will be easier to establish new relationships. |
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matsuiny2004
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 23, 2008
Posts: 1634
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| Posted: Tue May 13, 2008 6:59 pm Post subject: |
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| Alexey wrote: | | Zeldapsychology wrote: | | I tend to obsess over people sometimes I think. Call them constantly,jump around them (I used to jump on my coworkers back) (Don't ask I'm kind of crazy like that it's something I can't put into words.) |
Socialization and communication assumes DIALOGUE. It is more effective to be less active but more interested in another people, especially in their verbal and emotional responses. If you will listen to another people, it will be easier to establish new relationships. |
I would try to control your obsessions more, especially emailing people and talking to your teacher. It is ok to talk when you think it necessary, but definitelyslow down if anytrhing. It is ok to talk to her after class or something. |
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zeldapsychology
Phoenix
Joined: May 05, 2008
Age: 27
Posts: 3200
Location: Florida
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| Posted: Tue May 13, 2008 7:59 pm Post subject: |
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I was doing it DAILY and thought since oh I have no friends e-mails and I have my teachers I'll start sending her joke e-mails.
With the suspension she stated (I crossed the teacher student line and needed a Psychological Evaluation before I returned on campus.) I wish I would of understood my behavior better and I wish I could apoligize and tell her my view etc. (Since Psychological Evaluations cost money I have yet to do one.) The suspension was Feb.05. |
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zeldapsychology
Phoenix
Joined: May 05, 2008
Age: 27
Posts: 3200
Location: Florida
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| Posted: Tue May 13, 2008 8:40 pm Post subject: |
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| If I ever get the chance to apologize to that teacher should I say I'm sorry and try to describe WHY I feel I behaved the way I did? (I told her my Bipolar diagnosis she didn't think that was it but said if the pills helped take them.) It was my older sister who thought I had Asperger's plus I trust her and she's a great Psychologist and more so if she ever happens to have more issues with me she should be open for communication where if she had a problem she could come discuss it with me. What are your thoughts? (I'd give anything to be able to apologize to her.) There's not a second in the day I don't think about what happen. |
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matsuiny2004
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 23, 2008
Posts: 1634
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| Posted: Tue May 13, 2008 11:31 pm Post subject: |
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| zeldapsychology wrote: | | If I ever get the chance to apologize to that teacher should I say I'm sorry and try to describe WHY I feel I behaved the way I did? (I told her my Bipolar diagnosis she didn't think that was it but said if the pills helped take them.) It was my older sister who thought I had Asperger's plus I trust her and she's a great Psychologist and more so if she ever happens to have more issues with me she should be open for communication where if she had a problem she could come discuss it with me. What are your thoughts? (I'd give anything to be able to apologize to her.) There's not a second in the day I don't think about what happen. |
If you can prevent yourself from doing something like that again, then all that matters is you can forgive your self for it. You were unaware of your actions at the time and did not realize the effects they were creating. If it help maybe you can send her a letter. Do not do email or something like that. There are other classes and other colleges. you will be ok |
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zeldapsychology
Phoenix
Joined: May 05, 2008
Age: 27
Posts: 3200
Location: Florida
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| Posted: Wed May 14, 2008 10:53 am Post subject: |
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Thank You Matsuiny. Both my sister and mom have suggested a letter but my main fear is rejection. My family's belief is the statement "put yourself in that person's shoes" How would I FEEL if I was the Pscyhology teacher?" On the whole behavior issue itself I can so where there was cause for concern.
On the letter aspect why should I bother reading this letter from her she threatened me Im too busy with my husband, two kids and other students to worry about this student who threatened me." (The letter goes into the trash and she never gets a response.) I know there are other colleges and I plan on doing online classes in the fall.
The confusing thing of controlling my behavior is I tend not to exhibit one behavior and I come off as depressed.
I see behavior/life as a puzzle lets say I have a 20piece puzzle (20 different behaviors) I change one behavior (AKA take one piece away) then the puzzle is not complete (AKA I or perhaps You don't feel complete.) Does that make since? Yes that's a weird view to have but overall behavior wise I feel we all are who we are YOU have behaviors that make you you (AS or whatever) and I have behaviors that make me me and we are all different. |
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