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Silver_Meteor
Asperger Accountant
Joined: Jul 11, 2007
Posts: 1361
Location: North Kingstown, Rhode Island, USA
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 Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2008 5:34 pm Post subject: Do You Avoid Friendships Out of a Fear of Being Conned? |
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Are you reluctant to get close to people because you are concerned they will try to nail you when you let your guard down?
_________________
Not by revolution but through evolution are all things accomplished in permanency.
Certified Bookkeeper:AIPB
Diagnosed with Autism/Childhood Schizophrenia early 60s. Today, I would have Asperger Syndrome |
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Forsaken
Raven
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Joined: Dec 18, 2008
Posts: 110
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| Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2008 5:37 pm Post subject: |
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| I used to not be. |
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jkennedy293
Toucan
Joined: Oct 25, 2008
Age: 34
Posts: 275
Location: Holly Springs, NC
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| Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2008 5:38 pm Post subject: |
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| I don't think I avoid friendships because of this, but I do avoid loaning of money or property. I have had things not returned or money paid back too many times to count. |
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millie
bits, pieces, brass, animals
Joined: Oct 26, 2008
Age: 47
Posts: 3373
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| Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2008 5:38 pm Post subject: |
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i'm 46. i used to be. absolutely. not so much nowadays. I have finally learned to avoid scuzzbags - which was an impossibility for this gullible aspie up unti the age of about 45. but i am still very wary.
Last edited by millie on Wed Dec 31, 2008 7:12 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Postperson
The Daughter of Indifference
Joined: Jul 10, 2004
Age: 52
Posts: 4314
Location: Uz
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| Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2008 5:53 pm Post subject: |
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| yes, all my 'friends' have cheated, used me - basically treated me with contempt. saw my generosity and kindness as stupid. i don't expect that will ever change, you can't ever let you guard down and everything is a power game. who needs that? i'd rather have no friends. i have 2 dogs for friends. |
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NUFC_Fan
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Sep 15, 2008
Posts: 26
Location: Geordieland
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| Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2008 6:09 pm Post subject: |
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| Something similar happens to me with my brothers, I always avoid letting them see my computer screen, or what book I am reading. And I change the channel when they come in the room so they don't know what I'm watching. |
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ascan
Phoenix
Joined: Feb 23, 2005
Posts: 2259
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| Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2008 6:23 pm Post subject: |
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| Postperson wrote: | | yes, all my 'friends' have cheated, used me - basically treated me with contempt. saw my generosity and kindness as stupid. i don't expect that will ever change, you can't ever let you guard down and everything is a power game. who needs that? i'd rather have no friends. i have 2 dogs for friends. |
Hell, that's sad, Postperson. You need a good honest aspie chap to take care of you, and help you run the smallholding. |
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outlier
Phoenix
Joined: Oct 17, 2008
Posts: 1501
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| Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2008 7:01 pm Post subject: |
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| Yes. |
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Fnord
Metasyntactic Variable
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Joined: May 07, 2008
Posts: 6251
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| Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2008 7:10 pm Post subject: |
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| I've learned that every friend is a potential traitor, and to never do a favor for someone without immediately receiving a favor in return (strictly "Quid-Pro-Quo"). |
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ascan
Phoenix
Joined: Feb 23, 2005
Posts: 2259
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| Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2008 7:12 pm Post subject: |
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| Fnord wrote: | | I've learned that every friend is a potential traitor, and to never do a favor for someone without immediately receiving a favor in return (strictly "Quid-Pro-Quo"). |
I bet your neighbours love you, Fnord. |
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Fnord
Metasyntactic Variable
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Joined: May 07, 2008
Posts: 6251
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| Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2008 7:14 pm Post subject: |
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| ascan wrote: | | Fnord wrote: | | I've learned that every friend is a potential traitor, and to never do a favor for someone without immediately receiving a favor in return (strictly "Quid-Pro-Quo"). |
I bet your neighbours love you, Fnord. |
They only come 'round when they need a favor, such as when their kids are selling stuff, when they have petitions to sign, or when they need to borrow tools.
It's nice to know when you can depend on a friend or neighbor for a favor, but when they base the entire relationship how how often they can take advantage of you, that's not nice at all.
... Otherwise, they leave me alone, and that's just how I like it.
Last edited by Fnord on Wed Dec 31, 2008 7:19 pm; edited 2 times in total |
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ascan
Phoenix
Joined: Feb 23, 2005
Posts: 2259
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| Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2008 7:17 pm Post subject: |
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| Fnord wrote: | | ...Otherwise, they leave me alone, and that's just how I like it. |
Yes, there's a lot to be said for having it that way. |
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Postperson
The Daughter of Indifference
Joined: Jul 10, 2004
Age: 52
Posts: 4314
Location: Uz
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| Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2008 7:19 pm Post subject: |
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| ascan wrote: | | Postperson wrote: | | yes, all my 'friends' have cheated, used me - basically treated me with contempt. saw my generosity and kindness as stupid. i don't expect that will ever change, you can't ever let you guard down and everything is a power game. who needs that? i'd rather have no friends. i have 2 dogs for friends. |
Hell, that's sad, Postperson. You need a good honest aspie chap to take care of you, and help you run the smallholding. |
yair?
actually i'll be selling it hopefully in the next 12 months. wanna buy it? |
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ascan
Phoenix
Joined: Feb 23, 2005
Posts: 2259
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| Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2008 7:27 pm Post subject: |
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| Postperson wrote: | | ...actually i'll be selling it hopefully in the next 12 months. wanna buy it? |
I'll be staying in the UK for the time being, Postperson. But hope all goes well with the sale. |
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Postperson
The Daughter of Indifference
Joined: Jul 10, 2004
Age: 52
Posts: 4314
Location: Uz
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| Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2008 7:37 pm Post subject: |
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| Isn't it cold there? |
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