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radclyffe59
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Feb 11, 2008
Age: 35
Posts: 44
Location: Reading, Berkshire, UK
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 Posted: Wed Nov 04, 2009 4:01 pm Post subject: A line I heard on "Dexter". |
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Not saying this is necessarily true, but here is a line I heard on "Dexter" (tv series about a serial killer):
"...studies show that emotional intelligence plays a greater role in individual success than anything that can be measured on a standard IQ test."
I was wondering if anyone knew anything more about this theory, or had any other thoughts or opinions about it!
(I know it's just part of a script, but it caught my attention...)
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AS/ADHD/OCD software bundle installed. |
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Aimless
O Fleshy And Ambitionless
Joined: Apr 02, 2009
Posts: 3427
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| Posted: Wed Nov 04, 2009 4:31 pm Post subject: |
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| I've heard that before, but I can't remember where. |
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sgrannel
Dr. Strangelove
Joined: Feb 21, 2008
Posts: 1315
Location: The Bland Corporation
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| Posted: Wed Nov 04, 2009 6:45 pm Post subject: |
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Oh, crap that doesn't sound good for me then. Good thing there are people on my side who do have this. All I want to do is patent stuff and not own too many things.
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Mr. President, the technology required is easily within the means of even the smallest...nuclear power. It requires only the will to do so. |
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SoulcakeDuck
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 04, 2009
Age: 23
Posts: 963
Location: a bubble called Cognitive Entropy
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| Posted: Wed Nov 04, 2009 11:03 pm Post subject: |
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I have aspergers and I'm doing a diagnosis right now, as I feel i need some questions answered about my behavior, but at the same time all people I've known and spoken to (that I know/feel well enough to speak with) say that I have a extremely high EQ (emotional intelligence). Is this possible for a Aspie to have a very high EQ?
I don't smile, I don't comfort people when they show sadness or any of that stuff, but when a conversation gets to an emotional topic I can pretty much river dance around it explaining actions and human intentions that normal NTs cannot, and they will usually come to me for advice and guidance, showering me with questions (even tho I rather have them not to...). The conversations tend to get very tiresome and I'm not much of a conversation type, I tend to speak a little or not at all. After a session of explaining why a human does this and that and why, it always leaves me hugely baffled over how incredibly stupid "normal" people appear to be even in areas like this.
Aren't we the heartless cold monsters that show zero emotion towards others and appear as rude and isolated freaks?
And isn't it the "normal" norm of people that is always so in touch with their emotions and feeling and all that crap, how the f**k can they be so damn clueless in such matters...
Comments I get when speaking to people are "- Wow! you have really high EQ.", to put it bluntly.
I always feel like replying "- Wow! why is it even necessary for a "cold hearted monster" to explain something that should come naturally to you emotional beings,...you moron."
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Starr
Phoenix
Joined: Sep 18, 2006
Posts: 4575
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| Posted: Fri Nov 06, 2009 4:45 am Post subject: |
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Have you checked out the Myers Briggs personality test based on Carl Jung's typology?
http://www.personalitypathways.com/type_inventory.html
That's a short test but there are longer, more comprehensive versions online if you google 'em.
I think your 'type' has a lot to do with whether you have a high EQ, whether or not a person also has AS, although that has its own complications with communicating with people, of course. Perhaps you're a feeling or intuitive type? That would make it a lot easier to understand what's going on with people on an emotional level. |
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SoulcakeDuck
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 04, 2009
Age: 23
Posts: 963
Location: a bubble called Cognitive Entropy
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| Posted: Fri Nov 06, 2009 5:49 am Post subject: |
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| Starr wrote: | Have you checked out the Myers Briggs personality test based on Carl Jung's typology?
http://www.personalitypathways.com/type_inventory.html
That's a short test but there are longer, more comprehensive versions online if you google 'em.
I think your 'type' has a lot to do with whether you have a high EQ, whether or not a person also has AS, although that has its own complications with communicating with people, of course. Perhaps you're a feeling or intuitive type? That would make it a lot easier to understand what's going on with people on an emotional level. |
I did this test and it came out ISFP - Dominant Introverted Feeling.
I'm mostly quiet and I don't meddle in much or make fusses, my bark is very weak but if I were to bite I'd split you in half.
I dislike people in a whole and I resent smalltalk. I like to create stuff by myself and I HATE working in teams (like we always had to in school). If they put me in a group I let the others deal with decisions, and I just do what they tell me to. But if I work alone undisturbed I'll do a job 100 times better then in some halfassed dimwitted team. I don't care for other people at all, but if I grow a custom to someone then I will be honest and kind and guide them if asked.
Other then that I'm just polite when i have to and play the social games if needed, throw off a fabricated smile here and there.
I'm very bad at labeling feelings, as i just found out what anxiety was a few months ago, and I need them explained to me before I can answer a question regarding a feeling.
But when it comes down to pure emotion and feeling things it comes off more as an instinct, I can read a person in about three seconds knowing exactly how he/she will act and what they will most likely say or want to talk about.
This has been a great survival skill by the way.
At the same time I feel like I can relate deeply to all of the Introverted Personality Types, tho the ISFP is the one that I relate to the most (and the Thinker, f**k me I think on a scale that would make a NTs head go BOOM in less than 10 sec).
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EngishForAliens
Blue Jay
Joined: Sep 12, 2009
Age: 30
Posts: 93
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland
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| Posted: Sun Nov 08, 2009 9:01 am Post subject: |
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Einstein and Stephen Speilberg? I also know someone with aspergers who is president of a university.
Success is about capitalising on luck/opportunities, working hard and common sense. Maybe low EQ limits your opportunities but leaves you some. It has no affect on your luck, common sense or ability to work hard.
In fact special interests may open up opportunities for people the same way a high EQ might open opportunities for someone who is good at networking. |
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david_42
Sea Gull
Joined: Oct 19, 2009
Posts: 216
Location: PNW, USA
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| Posted: Sun Nov 08, 2009 12:25 pm Post subject: |
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| Garbage. The National Longitudinal Survey of Youth clearly shows that regardless of occupation, education, social background, gender or anything else measured by the study, that general intelligence as measured by standard IQ tests correlates strongly with success, be it social, financial or professional. |
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Dellingr
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Oct 27, 2009
Posts: 56
Location: Wellington, New Zealand
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| Posted: Mon Nov 09, 2009 5:27 am Post subject: |
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| SoulcakeDuck wrote: | | After a session of explaining why a human does this and that and why, it always leaves me hugely baffled over how incredibly stupid "normal" people appear to be even in areas like this.[/i] |
I get that too, when something's automatic, you don't always have much insight into what's actually involved, we get, as spectrumites, a more objective view of this sort of complex social and emotional stuff because it's not automatic for us [as much, anyway] and we have to be conscious of a lot more of the underlying mechanisms when we're engaged in it, meaning we have a better understanding sometimes of what's going on than the neurotypicals involved, and that we can see how much of it is stupid, unnecessary, inefficient or otherwise and can get nicely frustrated by it  
that's my theory, anyway...
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We do not experience fear, but we understand how it affects you-Legion |
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SoulcakeDuck
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 04, 2009
Age: 23
Posts: 963
Location: a bubble called Cognitive Entropy
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| Posted: Mon Nov 09, 2009 8:31 am Post subject: |
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| Dellingr wrote: | | SoulcakeDuck wrote: | | After a session of explaining why a human does this and that and why, it always leaves me hugely baffled over how incredibly stupid "normal" people appear to be even in areas like this.[/i] |
I get that too, when something's automatic, you don't always have much insight into what's actually involved, we get, as spectrumites, a more objective view of this sort of complex social and emotional stuff because it's not automatic for us [as much, anyway] and we have to be conscious of a lot more of the underlying mechanisms when we're engaged in it, meaning we have a better understanding sometimes of what's going on than the neurotypicals involved, and that we can see how much of it is stupid, unnecessary, inefficient or otherwise and can get nicely frustrated by it
that's my theory, anyway... |
Agreed.
My high EQ I suspect comes from a line of "well" spent hours (and then I'm talking HOURS) of trying to figure out why things and humans act a certain way. I grew up amongst very emotional and emotionally unstable people and while I took it all in very literally it became quite a challenge to even stay sane in such a "loving" environment.
But yes it's true we put a lot more energy in to the process of understanding then acting on whatever actions NTs execute so It really doesn't surprise me that much but it's still a bother.
I'm the type of person who puts a lot of effort in answering questions given, because i want to help. But often that leads to a explanation to long and to deep for those who seek a hasty response and instead of getting the feeling that I'm filling their skulls with something usefull I feel as i'm talking to a brick wall, and that always gives me a very bad and nauseating feeling that there is no helping these people.
We have the ability to learn through logic and reasoning, we are able to project the cause and effect in our minds and create solid answers to these emotional "mysteries", and most of the time they are proven correct and accurate. But the real problem lies in theory and practice. For example i know all that is to be known about how a person acts and I have the ability to read them in less then a few seconds to figure out how they will react and respond to certain questions and events, I simply know what kind of person I'm dealing with but due to my lack of verbal skill and ability to act when it comes down to the now I stand clueless and ready for whatever. We stick to our knowledge and anticipate a certain result and outcome that we have calculated and believe to be a correct response to certain situations in life but since we act on logic and are countered by emotional responses these two things collide since our facts that we know and learn are solid but emotions change in every direction and so we can never be 100% accurate of the outcome.
We simply might know a sh** load about EQ but when it comes down to actually applying that in real life it often fails, due to individuals different emotional settings and flat out stubbornness.
What really vexes me is when someone comes up to me and asks for a solution in a emotional matter, and when I tell them flat out why things go down the way they do they suddenly start up a discussion that I might be wrong about some things and they try to talk me in to other ways of seeing the matter.
Now I've been "raised" by 5 women and no men in my family, and they all show hints of feminism and rambling on how men are not needed.
So I basically come from an home full of forceful emotional tornadoes... and when someone is trying to teach me stuff or change my knowledge about how emotions work, I just wanna reply... "don't tell your daddy how to f**k".
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Coadunate
Phoenix
Joined: Aug 14, 2008
Age: 53
Posts: 679
Location: S. California
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| Posted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 1:25 pm Post subject: |
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I want to say one word to you. Just one word…….plastics. 
Sorry I couldn’t help myself. But seriously, I do want to say just one word……networking. |
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SoulcakeDuck
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 04, 2009
Age: 23
Posts: 963
Location: a bubble called Cognitive Entropy
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| Posted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 5:15 pm Post subject: |
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| Coadunate wrote: | I want to say one word to you. Just one word…….plastics.
Sorry I couldn’t help myself. But seriously, I do want to say just one word……networking. |
Hehe I'm all to familiar with that word, when I went to this University for Managing Arts and Exhibitions, networking was mentioned in every sentence of every discussion... and all i heard was ass kissing, ass kissing, ass kissing. I automatically from the first time I heard networking got this picture of a brown nose running around a room saying what he needed to say to get buy, like a suck up in different forms just to gather and preserve the "connections" he/she gathered. Sounded very wrong to me. |
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EngishForAliens
Blue Jay
Joined: Sep 12, 2009
Age: 30
Posts: 93
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland
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| Posted: Thu Nov 12, 2009 4:47 pm Post subject: |
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Most people who's "ass is worth kissing" don't want it kissed. But they do want you to build a rapore and a relationship with them based on things outside of work. I had a great example of this, I went for for a tough job interview as a lead software developer. It turns out after I joined that one of the main reasons I got the job came from a recommendation from an industry leader in this field. I only know this industry leader because I used to play poker at the same club as him. Poker was a special interest of mine for a few years so any interaction this guy would've had with me would've been talking about poker. I probably sounded like a genius. He saw my super high functioning side and not the autistic side.
If I'd worked day to day with him, I'd never have got a reference. Thats how networking works though, it's not about ass kissing. |
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SoulcakeDuck
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 04, 2009
Age: 23
Posts: 963
Location: a bubble called Cognitive Entropy
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| Posted: Fri Nov 13, 2009 12:02 am Post subject: |
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^
That's how networking works when it does so correctly, and genuinely. That was a really nice example of networking you had there. |
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HH
Deinonychus
Joined: Oct 29, 2009
Posts: 330
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| Posted: Mon Nov 16, 2009 5:39 pm Post subject: |
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| SoulcakeDuck wrote: | | I have aspergers and I'm doing a diagnosis right now, as I feel i need some questions answered about my behavior, but at the same time all people I've known and spoken to (that I know/feel well enough to speak with) say that I have a extremely high EQ (emotional intelligence). Is this possible for a Aspie to have a very high EQ? |
Sure, because I do, or at least that's what they tell me. Similarly, I know a severely asthmatic woodwind musician, a research librarian with severe dyslexia, athletes with chronic pain issues, and so on. It's amazing what people can overcome if they put in sheer time, effort, and will. |
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