Why is meeting someone online in person more dangerous...

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jc6chan
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28 Apr 2010, 11:10 am

...than meeting new people in real life?

Yes, I have heard many times of people say that some online predators are faking everything they tell you and that they can be really patient and take months just to trap you into their evil schemes.

However, couldn't people you meet in real life do the same? Not to scare you or anything, but couldn't your friend in real life take months just to earn your trust and then one day rape you or kidnap you?

The only thing I can think of is that in real life, you may be able to sense that something fishy is going on whereas online, you have no idea what is going on at the other end of the conversation.

So anyone have any ideas why meeting someone you met online is much more dangerous?



Asp-Z
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28 Apr 2010, 11:17 am

jc6chan wrote:
...than meeting new people in real life?

Yes, I have heard many times of people say that some online predators are faking everything they tell you and that they can be really patient and take months just to trap you into their evil schemes.

However, couldn't people you meet in real life do the same? Not to scare you or anything, but couldn't your friend in real life take months just to earn your trust and then one day rape you or kidnap you?

The only thing I can think of is that in real life, you may be able to sense that something fishy is going on whereas online, you have no idea what is going on at the other end of the conversation.

So anyone have any ideas why meeting someone you met online is much more dangerous?


This is all very true. Plus, online, you can talk to someone with webcams so you know they are who they say, or at least hear their voice on the phone (and if they make some sort of excuse about talking on the phone, it's a pretty sure sign something's fishy there).



Kenjuudo
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28 Apr 2010, 11:26 am

Asp-Z wrote:
This is all very true. Plus, online, you can talk to someone with webcams so you know they are who they say, or at least hear their voice on the phone (and if they make some sort of excuse about talking on the phone, it's a pretty sure sign something's fishy there).
I never talk to strangers (ie. online friends) on either webcam or on a phone. It doesn't mean I'm a dangerous person. :roll:


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Asp-Z
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28 Apr 2010, 11:29 am

Kenjuudo wrote:
Asp-Z wrote:
This is all very true. Plus, online, you can talk to someone with webcams so you know they are who they say, or at least hear their voice on the phone (and if they make some sort of excuse about talking on the phone, it's a pretty sure sign something's fishy there).
I never talk to strangers (ie. online friends) on either webcam or on a phone. It doesn't mean I'm a dangerous person. :roll:


Well if you were going to meet someone in real life, it'd be smart to talk to them on the phone or webcam first, that's all I'm saying.

P.S. this is my 1337th post! :D



jc6chan
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28 Apr 2010, 11:31 am

So it seems like no one can give a good reason for the common saying of how it is dangerous to meet up with someone you met online?



Owl
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28 Apr 2010, 12:09 pm

I couldn't meet someone I'd met online in real life in case they didn't look anything like their avatar - I just couldn't take that kind of disappointment! :D

Seriously though I met my wife through the internet. I cast for the film I was shooting she applied as did others and we met and she was
right for the film.
A year later we were still friends mainly online through messenger and then we started hanging out together and the rest is history.



CockneyRebel
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28 Apr 2010, 12:13 pm

I don't think that I've have a thick enough skin to meet someone that I know online. I just don't know how that person is going to act in real time.


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jc6chan
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28 Apr 2010, 12:28 pm

So about my original question, do people only say its more dangerous just to scare people?



Asp-Z
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28 Apr 2010, 12:34 pm

jc6chan wrote:
So about my original question, do people only say its more dangerous just to scare people?


It's because the media likes to blow things way out of proportion, and they seem to love blaming the "tentacles of the internet" (I hate that phrase) for everything.

Also note that the number of people murdered, raped, etc, by people they didn't meet in the internet is much much higher than the number of people who've had that stuff done to them my people they did meet online.

And, as I said, as long as you talk to someone with webcams or something before you meet them, you know for sure they are real.



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28 Apr 2010, 12:38 pm

I think it's cautionary and based on circumstance. Everything requires a sensible amount of caution. But there will always be scaremongers. The Daily Mail news paper in the UK takes pride in scare-mongering stories such as 'Online serial date fiend decapitated victim and proceeded to butt probe them before eating them and later sh**ting them out!' 8O



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28 Apr 2010, 12:43 pm

My brother spent a month or so chatting online to a girl in Thailand. A girl who turned out to be a guy. Fortunately they didn't meet up and then my bro bought a webcam and decided to chat with girls this way. You can never be too careful.



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28 Apr 2010, 12:49 pm

Because the sort of people - or I should say among the sorts of people who need to use the INTERNET to meet others, are the ones who are dangerous.

I had to be careful how I said that because Aspies can often be in the position of needing the Internet to expand their social sphere, for different reasons to why those who are dangerous and have venal motives need the Internet to make contacts.



jc6chan
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28 Apr 2010, 2:29 pm

Asp-Z wrote:
And, as I said, as long as you talk to someone with webcams or something before you meet them, you know for sure they are real.

No you don't. The predator can send another person to the webcam and say "Lets meet up!" But when you meet up, its an old fart attempting to snatch you away.



iamnotaparakeet
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28 Apr 2010, 3:21 pm

Kenjuudo wrote:
Asp-Z wrote:
This is all very true. Plus, online, you can talk to someone with webcams so you know they are who they say, or at least hear their voice on the phone (and if they make some sort of excuse about talking on the phone, it's a pretty sure sign something's fishy there).
I never talk to strangers (ie. online friends) on either webcam or on a phone. It doesn't mean I'm a dangerous person. :roll:

It doesn't mean that you're not dangerous either. Any type of criteria in this matter is fairly circumstantial, especially as they are generalizations across the broad spectrum of internet usership rather than on the basis of individuality. Personally, I think you ARE dangerous. :P



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28 Apr 2010, 3:34 pm

This is all part of your clever ruse isn't it? Online predator.

In all seriousness, I see your point though. Everything in life requires a leap of faith.
Although it is much harder to do the whole kidnapping thing offline because the person's friends and family can warn you about them, it would also require a lot more acting skill to come off as friendly and unassuming when you're a serial killer/serial killer in the making in person then online.

So I think the warning is valid.



jc6chan
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28 Apr 2010, 4:31 pm

Darkword wrote:
the person's friends and family can warn you about them,

Most friends I know my family doesn't really know them.

Darkword wrote:
it would also require a lot more acting skill to come off as friendly and unassuming when you're a serial killer/serial killer in the making in person then online.

You have a point there. But trust me, there are many professional actors out there. Besides, autistics have trouble reading people's facial expressions and stuff so they will be oblivious when "things doesn't seem right".