Why do people rush into relationships?

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Tim_Tex
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03 Sep 2010, 8:02 pm

What motivates people to make long-term plans and, in some cases, propose to people when they have not been in a relationship long enough to know the other person well enough to make those plans? Usually the time period in question is 6 months or less.

Is it insecurity, fear of losing the other person, etc.?


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nick007
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03 Sep 2010, 8:21 pm

There could be a few rezones. They may be strongly infatuated & think it's love(lots of people make that mistake). They may also want a relationship with some security; the may not want to waist their time chasing someone if the person is not interested in anything long term. Some people also tend to get obsessed or take things fast


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Erisad
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03 Sep 2010, 8:54 pm

Instant gratification. :D



sgrannel
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03 Sep 2010, 8:57 pm

It's so the other person doesn't think you've lost interest.



menintights
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03 Sep 2010, 9:17 pm

Because life just imitates bad TV shows.



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03 Sep 2010, 10:20 pm

nick007 wrote:
There could be a few rezones. They may be strongly infatuated & think it's love(lots of people make that mistake). They may also want a relationship with some security; the may not want to waist their time chasing someone if the person is not interested in anything long term. Some people also tend to get obsessed or take things fast


These are good. Add to the list that they're getting older/interesting in having children, they think marriage will complete their lives somehow, they think that's what you're supposed to do, they believe in "love at first sight", or they have an ulterior motive (which is closely tied to the secure relationship premise).

I had several people propose in the past to prevent me from terminating the relationship (which was insulting).



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04 Sep 2010, 12:12 am

From my experience, I did it because I never had a boyfriend before and I wanted the experience so I could say I have a boyfriend now or say I had one. I was afraid if we just met and stayed friends, I would see he wasn't right for me and bam I had lost my chance. But I was also hoping it work out for the both of us and we be right for each other.



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04 Sep 2010, 12:49 am

I think it's inpatience. They're feeling lonely and want to fill in the void as soon as they can, rather than wait and do things the slow and cautious way by being friends with someone for a while first. I've done both: got into a relationship straight away AND did the friends thing for a long while before going further. Both relationships turned out crap.



Blasty
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04 Sep 2010, 1:01 am

The media and society tell us that it's bad to be single. I think that's the main cause.



Shebakoby
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04 Sep 2010, 1:59 am

they are desperate and hormones make them idiots.



smudge
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04 Sep 2010, 9:09 am

I find it crazy that people will move into the other's house/get engaged after getting together from a big breakup. People even have another baby after getting back together again within a month. It's totally bonkers. Someone I know got married within a couple of weeks of knowing this guy.



Asp-Z
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04 Sep 2010, 10:28 am

Because they become infatuated with that person.



rmgh
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04 Sep 2010, 5:27 pm

Shebakoby wrote:
they are desperate and hormones make them idiots.

I agree with this.



nick007
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04 Sep 2010, 6:12 pm

I rushed in a relationship years ago. We wer freinds a while before but things got serious pretty fast after it became romantic instead of just a friendship. I was obsessed with her & dependant on her & extremely insecure but I also truly loved her with all my heart & I had NO desire to be with anyone but her. It was also the only time in my life when I ever felt truly happy & she also seemed a lot happier than she was when we met


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rmgh
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04 Sep 2010, 6:18 pm

nick007 wrote:
I rushed in a relationship years ago. We wer freinds a while before but things got serious pretty fast after it became romantic instead of just a friendship. I was obsessed with her & dependant on her & extremely insecure but I also truly loved her with all my heart & I had NO desire to be with anyone but her. It was also the only time in my life when I ever felt truly happy & she also seemed a lot happier than she was when we met

What happened? If I can ask.



n4mwd
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04 Sep 2010, 6:22 pm

rmgh wrote:
Shebakoby wrote:
they are desperate and hormones make them idiots.

I agree with this.


I third it.

A lot of people have trouble differentiating love from lust. Lust is temporary, love is permanent.