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nick007
old-skewl fan-boy
Joined: May 05, 2010
Age: 30
Posts: 9806
Location: was Louisiana but moved in with my girlfreind in Vermont
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 Posted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 11:45 am Post subject: |
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I tried OKC for a couple years & I had no luck on it however I had no luck on any of the many dating sites I tried. A lot of the women who ere rated as high matches were very incompatible with me; lots mentioned in their pros how they loved to party &/or they kept going on about how they were Catholic; I'm a straight-edge Secular Humanist. Almost none of the women I messaged ever messaged me back; i got lots more messages from gay guys. I'm betting like most dating sites OKC had a much higher percentage of men to women.
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hyperlexian
loves the man who typed too much and ran outta spa
Joined: Jul 22, 2010
Age: 41
Posts: 21990
Location: with bucephalus
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| Posted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 11:51 am Post subject: |
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^^^ actually, dating sites overall have about an equal number of males and females. there is a slight difference from site to site but OKCupid is pretty balanced.
i am not positive why people have an idea that there are more men than women on the sites, but i do have a theory. maybe it's because membership varies by age bracket. there are more older women enrolled in proportion to men as compared to younger women in proportion to men - and younger women are the most highly sought after by ALL age brackets of males. so it may look to some men like there are hardly any women on dating sites because there aren't many young women on there... and the older women are effectively invisible in comparison.
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nick007
old-skewl fan-boy
Joined: May 05, 2010
Age: 30
Posts: 9806
Location: was Louisiana but moved in with my girlfreind in Vermont
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| Posted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 12:07 pm Post subject: |
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| hyperlexian wrote: | ^^^ actually, dating sites overall have about an equal number of males and females. there is a slight difference from site to site but OKCupid is pretty balanced.
i am not positive why people have an idea that there are more men than women on the sites, but i do have a theory. maybe it's because membership varies by age bracket. there are more older women enrolled in proportion to men as compared to younger women in proportion to men - and younger women are the most highly sought after by ALL age brackets of males. so it may look to some men like there are hardly any women on dating sites because there aren't many young women on there... and the older women are effectively invisible in comparison. |
I've used lots of dating sites that had forums & lots of the men there were posting about how few women would ever message them & the women who replied to those post were talking about how women don't have time to reply to most messages because they get so many. Either most guys on those dating sites were mass messaging most all the women who used them or there was a much higher ratio of men to women. If the same amount of women were actively wanting a relationship as the men on those sites; the messaging between guys & women would be more balanced instead of women getting bombarded with messages & lots of guys being frustrated because they seldom get any
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hyperlexian
loves the man who typed too much and ran outta spa
Joined: Jul 22, 2010
Age: 41
Posts: 21990
Location: with bucephalus
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| Posted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 12:11 pm Post subject: |
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well, it's been shown that there are a pretty much equal number of men and women on dating sites, so people's impression that there are more men than women is not accurate. it interests me to know why this impression exists.
many men do mass-message women (i had a second "dummy" profile to filter some of those men out), and it makes it very hard to figure out who is authentically interested. it makes women more jaded on the sites and less likely to respond much to men at all unless the man seems *really* interesting.
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nick007
old-skewl fan-boy
Joined: May 05, 2010
Age: 30
Posts: 9806
Location: was Louisiana but moved in with my girlfreind in Vermont
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| Posted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 12:19 pm Post subject: |
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| hyperlexian wrote: | well, it's been shown that there are a pretty much equal number of men and women on dating sites, so people's impression that there are more men than women is not accurate. it interests me to know why this impression exists.
many men do mass-message women (i had a second "dummy" profile to filter some of those men out), and it makes it very hard to figure out who is authentically interested. it makes women more jaded on the sites and less likely to respond much to men at all unless the man seems *really* interesting. |
The men would not need to be mass messaging women to get replies if the ratio was balanced
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hyperlexian
loves the man who typed too much and ran outta spa
Joined: Jul 22, 2010
Age: 41
Posts: 21990
Location: with bucephalus
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| Posted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 12:39 pm Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | On any given dating site, the sex ratio is commonly unbalanced. A website may have 2 women for every man, but they may be in the 35+ range, while the men are generally under 35. Unfortunately, little is known about the sex ratio controlled for age. eHarmony's membership is about 58% female and 42% male[citation needed], whereas the ratio at Match.com is about the reverse of that. When you get into the specialty niche websites where the primary demographic is male, you typically get a very unbalanced ratio of male to female or female to male.[23] Niche sites cater to people with special interests, such as sports fans, racing and automotive fans, medical or other professionals, people with political or religious preferences (e.g. Hindu, Jewish, Christian, Muslim, etc.), people with medical conditions (e.g. HIV+, obese), or those living in rural farm communities. |
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Online_dating_service
| Quote: | This really varies depending on the site. Most of the more casual "photo personals" sites (Match, etc.) attract more men than women, although not by a large margin; eHarmony has a better ratio, with slightly more women than men. But take all of this with a grain of salt because:
•It depends on which metric you're looking at. These are conversion funnel businesses, so it goes from website visitors to registrants to paying subscribers. Conversion rates vary by gender.
•The numbers are manipulable. These businesses spend heavily on customer acquisition, through online and offline marketing. Any site can bring in more of one gender or the other by simply adjusting its media spend (e.g., buy more ads on Lifetime in a given month, fewer on ESPN) -- but it may not make sense to do so, if one group converts better than the other.
•What really matters isn't the overall ratio, but the gender balance by age (as well as other demographic factors like race and religious faith). Most online dating sites have a surplus of younger men and older women, reflecting the social realities of the dating world. |
http://www.quora.com/Online-Dating/What-is-the-male-female-ratio-on-big-five-dating-websites-Match-com-eHarmony-PlentyofFish-Zoosk-and-OKCupid
http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/the-case-for-an-older-woman/
the ratios are very close, as you can see. it's all about perception.
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gemstone123
Cowboy
Joined: Aug 22, 2008
Posts: 1237
Location: UK
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| Posted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 12:52 pm Post subject: |
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I'm on OKCupid. Though I only go on it every so often.
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ValentineWiggin
Yup.
Joined: May 16, 2011
Posts: 4879
Location: Beneath my cat's paw
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| Posted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 12:58 pm Post subject: |
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| nick007 wrote: | | I've used lots of dating sites that had forums & lots of the men there were posting about how few women would ever message them & the women who replied to those post were talking about how women don't have time to reply to most messages because they get so many. Either most guys on those dating sites were mass messaging most all the women who used them or there was a much higher ratio of men to women. If the same amount of women were actively wanting a relationship as the men on those sites; the messaging between guys & women would be more balanced instead of women getting bombarded with messages & lots of guys being frustrated because they seldom get any |
So...so...so many fallacies...head hurts...
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Salome
Sea Gull
Joined: Dec 02, 2010
Posts: 200
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| Posted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 1:25 pm Post subject: |
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Grrrrrrrrrrr! 
Why are all my best matches on the other side of the planet!?! |
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Daemonic-Jackal
Phoenix
Joined: Feb 16, 2009
Age: 27
Posts: 581
Location: Salford, United Kingdom
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| Posted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 1:50 pm Post subject: |
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Use to be on there, gave up because too many of the British women on there are hypocrites.
Although I've just recently been turned down by the one girl I truly cared about, so might give it another go.
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techstepgenr8tion
that chatty American
Joined: Feb 07, 2005
Posts: 14856
Location: A beautiful vector among many
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| Posted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 1:56 pm Post subject: |
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Did for a bit and got out of it. Was on Eharmony much longer but, decided to take myself off the market (for now or entirely - I'm not sure).
The problem I found with OK Cupid, at least in the major city that I live in, was that the faces barely changed. You had a chance to go in, see who you'd want to talk to, if none of the ten or fifteen you saw replied it seemed like you'd have to wait another couple years before you had another five or ten worth contacting again. |
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techstepgenr8tion
that chatty American
Joined: Feb 07, 2005
Posts: 14856
Location: A beautiful vector among many
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| Posted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 2:01 pm Post subject: |
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| nick007 wrote: | | I've used lots of dating sites that had forums & lots of the men there were posting about how few women would ever message them & the women who replied to those post were talking about how women don't have time to reply to most messages because they get so many. Either most guys on those dating sites were mass messaging most all the women who used them or there was a much higher ratio of men to women. If the same amount of women were actively wanting a relationship as the men on those sites; the messaging between guys & women would be more balanced instead of women getting bombarded with messages & lots of guys being frustrated because they seldom get any |
The way I came to understand it is that so many jags and chachies spam the girls that the well is already poisoned. It seems like initiating contact doesn't often do a lot to increase odds; either they contact you or you try contacting them and the responses back will still be only a fraction of the amount who initiate contact. |
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47x
Sea Gull
Joined: Aug 18, 2011
Age: 25
Posts: 210
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| Posted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 5:13 pm Post subject: |
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| I go there for the tests. I like them. I talked to a few people there but I always stopped after a while. I get so tired talking to people...even online. I have to talk about their interests and they want answers from me and I hate that I have to think so much over everything I write. So now I've given up. |
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TeaEarlGreyHot
Your Maya
Joined: Jul 05, 2010
Age: 30
Posts: 28106
Location: California
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| Posted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 5:22 pm Post subject: |
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I have one, but haven't checked it in a while. I got bored of the selection and would have deleted it if I hadn't forgotten my password.
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Do you teach me while I'm here?
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SectorStar
Blue Jay
Joined: May 26, 2009
Age: 24
Posts: 82
Location: Roseburg, Oregon
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| Posted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 6:20 pm Post subject: |
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I've had mine for a couple years and been thinking about deleting it soon. Not a lot of people from my area on there. The few that are I find out to be underage after a few messages. The rest of them either flat out don't respond period, clearly aren't interested in me, or stop messaging me once I tell them I'm high functioning autistic. I think my favorite is when after we've been talking for a week I pop the question and ask if they wanna see a movie or something and the response is "well I'm kinda seeing someone right now." Ok....why the freak are you on a dating site talking to other guys then!? I've tried plenty of fish and my success is about the same, in fact most of the free dating sites I've tried have like the same 20-30 girls from the last site I tried that I know would probably never date me.
The life of an autistic person can be a lonely one. Oh well, I'm used to it by now.... |
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