Endinglignt
Blue Jay
Joined: Jan 19, 2012
Age: 25
Posts: 78
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 Posted: Sun Feb 19, 2012 12:33 am Post subject: Straight but want to crossdress |
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| I have had these thoughts for as long as I can remember (and that's saying a lot) but have always wanted to crossdress with a girl pal and just hang out. I am not sure why I am posting this but I felt I should. |
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Kail
Deinonychus
Joined: Feb 24, 2011
Age: 21
Posts: 373
Location: MEXICO
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| Posted: Sun Feb 19, 2012 3:33 am Post subject: |
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I sometimes get a strong urge to want to try and know absolutely everything...
But then something goes wrong and I breakdown, meltdown or get overstimulated and remember why I'm not leaping into pools head first, or biting into moldy bread,
I make sure the pool and bread are safe for leaping in is my moral.....
There's different ways of bracing for cold and warm water, and depth and saltiness... and chlorine content,
Some breads contain random stuff, like gluten...or peanuts,
I must be trying out terrible advice today lol
My motto for everything is 'Jump in to it!' - everything has sacrifice.
Part of choice is we choose who we want to be and also who we don't want to be, (or not do or do)
You may be wanting to do this, but you more don't want to do it, and that may be holding you back from a new experience,
I know it's a sport quote, but I feel it relates to life a lot "Never train to win, train to not lose"
Who and what are you winning by exploring a new interest?
Who and what are winning by staying descriptive rather than acquainted?
I hope I made sense, and hope everyone in the world reads Bertrand Russels, Problems of Philosophy once a year!
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Endinglignt
Blue Jay
Joined: Jan 19, 2012
Age: 25
Posts: 78
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| Posted: Sun Feb 19, 2012 1:19 pm Post subject: |
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I get what your saying. I think...
Now that I am awake and not beating my head .
I have had this urge for a long time and like I said I want to do it with female friend. I have never been good with other guys and the few friends I have made that we're female all told me " you really don't have that guy feel to you" I know I am not transgendered because all in all I am happy to be a guy (but if by some magic or I was hurt baldy and some how by changing my gender I would not be to upset)
But I do not want to buy my self the clothes(will pay for them but not buy) and I know some girls out there are not into the kind shy guy that thinks about this stuff. |
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ReindeerRoger
Raven
Joined: Feb 19, 2012
Posts: 119
Location: Toronto, Canada
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| Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2012 2:21 am Post subject: |
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Well, if you end up in a relationship there's actually alot of girls who are into gender play, and if you have some friends-who-are-girls handy they'd probably be game.
The biggest obstacle here is probably your gender expression, like you feel like it would compromise your masculinity or affect the way you're perceived by others. But I think a good friend wouldn't think less of you for it and wouldn't mention it to people you wouldn't want them to either. Like, over-all it just sounds like a fun time.
Being able to play with your gender expression just proves that you're more conscious of your gender generally, so you can know the gender you're comfortable with more authoritatively than most people, who havn't tried anything else. Plus gender is just a code you adhere to for no reason other than habit and self-consciousness anyways, there's not many real differences between the genders despite all the constructed ones.
My hunch is that the opportunity might not come as often as you like, and you might have to semi-actively seek one out, but if it does than you should go for it, just for the experience and to know what you think of it. People I know who are into it say performing other genders really changes the way they perceive gender and society. |
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DiscardedWhisper
Deinonychus
Joined: Mar 17, 2011
Posts: 371
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| Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2012 3:15 am Post subject: Re: Straight but want to crossdress |
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| Endinglignt wrote: | | I have had these thoughts for as long as I can remember (and that's saying a lot) but have always wanted to crossdress with a girl pal and just hang out. I am not sure why I am posting this but I felt I should. |
It is my understanding that there are a good number of heterosexual males who enjoy dressing up in private with their girlfriend/wife. I've never met any, but I've read some material on the subject.
If you're worried that there's something wrong with you, there isn't. Some people make a lot of money crossdressing. Take Eddie Izzard, for instance. (It's not just an act, he does like to dress that way. And he's hetero.) |
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Endinglignt
Blue Jay
Joined: Jan 19, 2012
Age: 25
Posts: 78
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| Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2012 2:31 pm Post subject: |
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I am semi active looking for help and know I am okay with what I want. As for female friends....I kinda have 0 friends. Part of my posts here is friend hungting.
So far I seem to have a wall around keeping females away. |
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Endinglignt
Blue Jay
Joined: Jan 19, 2012
Age: 25
Posts: 78
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| Posted: Wed Feb 29, 2012 4:27 pm Post subject: |
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| After posting this here I found a girl wanting to help...draw back? Her bf wants to kill me. |
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visagrunt
Polymath
Joined: Oct 17, 2009
Age: 45
Posts: 5754
Location: Vancouver, BC
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| Posted: Wed Feb 29, 2012 5:08 pm Post subject: Re: Straight but want to crossdress |
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| DiscardedWhisper wrote: | It is my understanding that there are a good number of heterosexual males who enjoy dressing up in private with their girlfriend/wife. I've never met any, but I've read some material on the subject.
If you're worried that there's something wrong with you, there isn't. Some people make a lot of money crossdressing. Take Eddie Izzard, for instance. (It's not just an act, he does like to dress that way. And he's hetero.) |
You are most certainly correct. I knew several straight men who enjoy cross-dressing--not least of whom is my own brother.
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davidalan11235813
Snowy Owl
Joined: Aug 02, 2011
Age: 23
Posts: 147
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| Posted: Wed Feb 29, 2012 5:59 pm Post subject: |
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Honestly, I'm pretty sure most transvestites are hetero. I'm a bit sauced ATM and can't be arsed to do the research, but I am relatively sure that is the case.
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"Nice to meet you Rose. Run for your life!" |
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ReindeerRoger
Raven
Joined: Feb 19, 2012
Posts: 119
Location: Toronto, Canada
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| Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2012 12:24 am Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | "Honestly, I'm pretty sure most transvestites are hetero." |
I think the one you're thinking of is that many drag queens are straight. But on a related note, some transgendered/genderqueer people are straight and others are gay or some other orientation. (Is this what you meant?)
Drag queens are people of any description who play around with gender for any reason, generally only occasionally for fun or at parties or to perform. Transvestite refers to transgender people who undergo sex change operations, but anyways neither of these things give any indication of sexual orientation. |
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auntblabby
Chief Assistant to the Assistant Chief
Joined: Feb 13, 2010
Posts: 18156
Location: the island of loveable toy humans
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| Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2012 12:31 am Post subject: Re: Straight but want to crossdress |
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| visagrunt wrote: | | DiscardedWhisper wrote: | It is my understanding that there are a good number of heterosexual males who enjoy dressing up in private with their girlfriend/wife. I've never met any, but I've read some material on the subject.
If you're worried that there's something wrong with you, there isn't. Some people make a lot of money crossdressing. Take Eddie Izzard, for instance. (It's not just an act, he does like to dress that way. And he's hetero.) |
You are most certainly correct. I knew several straight men who enjoy cross-dressing--not least of whom is my own brother. |
according to kinsey et al, gay-straight is a continuum. people can be versatile, including in what styles they like to affect. AFAIC, women have all the best clothing, men get the dregs. |
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ReindeerRoger
Raven
Joined: Feb 19, 2012
Posts: 119
Location: Toronto, Canada
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| Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2012 12:46 am Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | according to kinsey et al, gay-straight is a continuum. |
Kinsey isn't the cutting-edge in these matters, his report was written in like 1948.
Anyways, it isn't a continuum for everyone, and the scale doesn't represent the massive range of sexual orientations that exist very well.
| Quote: | | people can be versatile, including in what styles they like to affect. |
Gender expression is a separate topic from both sexual orientation and sexual identity.
This one is homemade by some person, and even it isn't comprehensive. (Not to mention not everyone thinks this over to so much depth), but it's way better than the kinsey scale:
I saw what you were getting at though. The basic message is that gender play is awesome and means whatever you want it to mean. |
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CrazyCatLord
Phoenix
Joined: Oct 25, 2011
Posts: 2177
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| Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2012 11:03 am Post subject: |
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| davidalan11235813 wrote: | | Honestly, I'm pretty sure most transvestites are hetero. I'm a bit sauced ATM and can't be arsed to do the research, but I am relatively sure that is the case. |
I've read the same, and all crossdressers that I've talked to in Second Life were either hetero or bi. There is also a huge number of transgender / transsexual people who are hetero according to their birth sex (i.e., gay or lesbian according to their gender identity). |
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davidalan11235813
Snowy Owl
Joined: Aug 02, 2011
Age: 23
Posts: 147
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| Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2012 11:07 am Post subject: |
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| ReindeerRoger wrote: | | Quote: | | "Honestly, I'm pretty sure most transvestites are hetero." |
I think the one you're thinking of is that many drag queens are straight. |
That's what I said, just differently worded. I think you're confusing the words transgender or maybe transsexual with transvestite. Transvestite just means someone who wears clothing meant for the opposite sex, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity (from the Latin "trans"-meaning across or over, and "vestitus"-meaning dressed).
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ReindeerRoger
Raven
Joined: Feb 19, 2012
Posts: 119
Location: Toronto, Canada
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| Posted: Fri Mar 02, 2012 2:42 am Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | That's what I said, just differently worded. I think you're confusing the words transgender or maybe transsexual with transvestite. Transvestite just means someone who wears clothing meant for the opposite sex, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity (from the Latin "trans"-meaning across or over, and "vestitus"-meaning dressed). |
Oh geeze, you're completely right. Until now I thought it was just a semi-offensive but occasionally used label for transgender people. But I just looked it up, and indeed the etymology seems obvious now. Well, I guess having the graphic up doesn't hurt anything. |
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