y-pod
Phoenix
Joined: Apr 17, 2010
Posts: 802
Location: Canada
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 Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 2:50 am Post subject: Do you hate being asked questions? |
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I was wondering if other aspies hate being ask questions, especially those out of the blues. Everyone who knows me well know I don't like being asked questions unless it's related to one of my interests. I hate not knowing the answers.
Those telephone surveys are quite annoying enough. I usually state that I don't know anything related to their topic and they still want to ask you the whole list of questions. Harder to avoid are my parents, who never seem to have got to know me. My dad doesn't usually talk very much, but whenever he calls he always "has a question for me". So far every question he asked me this year has been something I don't know, like buying a new car (I don't drive), house repairs (like I do any) or tax tips (we're in different countries). Last time I got fed up and told him not to ask me any more questions unless it's related to girly stuff, like jewelry, makeup, clothes or cooking. He stopped for a while, and just called tonight at 10:30 about tips on fumigating cockroaches (I've never even seen a cockroach.). I don't know what to do? I know I shouldn't be this bothered by people asking me questions. But I think I have an innate need to be able to answer questions correctly and fix problems. So random questions I don't know about or don't care about really annoy me.  My dad is not stupid and he can figure out all sorts of things himself. He has a phD in physics and has been a successful scientist. I wonder if he just harass everyone's opinion for "data collection" purpose.
My mom is a whole different story, she asks me all sorts of things, too, many very strange. At least she has the excuse of being not bright and thus have to ask for other people's opinions.
Anyway I think I'm all sensitized after my parents, now I hate most questions, especially stupid ones.
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fraac
Tufted Titmouse
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Joined: Mar 24, 2011
Posts: 1865
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| Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 2:53 am Post subject: |
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| What's it to ya? |
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so_subtly_strange
Toucan
Joined: Jan 18, 2011
Age: 26
Posts: 293
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| Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 3:14 am Post subject: |
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| fraac wrote: | | What's it to ya? |
lol
yes sometimes i hate any sort of question. it doesnt matter if its a stupid one or a relevant one. The nature of the interaction of someone demanding information can be incredibly irritating |
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Davuardo
Blue Jay
Joined: Mar 13, 2011
Age: 18
Posts: 85
Location: Depends who you ask
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| Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 3:43 am Post subject: |
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I wonder if your dad just asks you these questions because he is looking for an excuse to talk to you
Remember, neurotypicals don't do things on face value, he probably doesn't give two hoots about your tax tips, he just wants a conversation.
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Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 22 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie
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enrico_dandolo
Phoenix
Joined: Nov 21, 2011
Posts: 866
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| Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 4:11 am Post subject: |
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I hate it from my parents. They don't ask my for tax tips, but they always want to know what I did, what class I went to, if it was interesting, if I liked supper, when is my next exam, if my hypothetical exam went well, etc., which I find quite uninteresting, especially since the answer is always the same to all these questions (respectivally: "Nothing interesting", "It's on my schedule on the fridge", "Yes", "It's food", "Somewhere in the future", "Which?"/"Yes").
Otherwise, I don't know, because I rarely talk to other people, and they don't ask questions.
I think Davuardo is right, however. I just don't understand the interest. |
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TenPencePiece
Curiosity Killed the Cone
Joined: Dec 12, 2009
Age: 18
Posts: 43750
Location: Greater Manchester, United Kingdom
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| Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 5:23 am Post subject: |
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Sometimes, yes
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CrazyCatLord
Phoenix
Joined: Oct 25, 2011
Posts: 2177
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| Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 5:46 am Post subject: |
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I never don't pick up the phone unless I'm expecting a call, so telephone surveys don't bother me. They are pretty rare here anyway. What bothers me more are people who pull up their car next to me and ask for the way when I'm about and about. I couldn't help them even if I wanted to, because I can't remember street names  I only use landmarks such as shops to find my way. So I usually lie and tell them that I don't live here. |
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HairlessAlbinoCat
Sea Gull
Joined: Aug 26, 2011
Age: 23
Posts: 202
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| Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 6:04 am Post subject: |
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| I only hate questions to emotional matters or things that relate to what I liked or did not liked- They bother me because most of the time I don't know or have a remote clue and apparently one should always say fine even when you are not to the question how are you? , it is all very confusing, otherwise I don't think I mind questions as long as they are at least of near-intellectual matter otherwise I feel like an alien trying to figure out something that has no scientific way of deducting. I just hate such questions. |
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ToughDiamond
Phoenix
Joined: Sep 16, 2008
Age: 60
Posts: 4751
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| Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 6:18 am Post subject: |
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I don't usually mind questions, in fact I often enjoy trying to give a good answer - why do you think I hang about on WP? Questions make me think......I like that. Also I used to do quite well in my first school with the work, and I guess I bulit up a "reward habit" of giving the desired answer to the teachers' questions and being praised.
But telephone questionnaires, forget it. Sure, some of the questions present a bit of a challenge, but mostly they're just trying to get my personal details and profile me so they can sell me stuff I don't want. To my mind that is malicious so I don't co-operate.
I also would find it frustrating if somebody kept asking me questions that a moment's thought would tell them I wasn't qualified to answer. A partner of mine used to keep asking questions about what was going on in the films we watched together. I would wearily point out that I didn't know, and she would then say that it was only a rhetorical question. But she used to catch me out with it every time....I never managed to get au fait with the idea that her questions didn't need answering. I guess I still have a very black-and-white view of anything with a question mark......it feels totally wrong to ignore questions. Perhaps that's why I can feel so annoyed when people ask me inappropriate questions........if I could just disengage without feeling bad, it would probably be water of a duck's back. But without an answer, a question is an unresolved thing that screams out at me to put it straight. |
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Seashell
Velociraptor
Joined: Jun 25, 2007
Posts: 471
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| Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 6:44 am Post subject: |
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I don't like questions either, especially if I'm put on the spot. I feel like I'm being interrogated. I don't mind yes/no questions or factual questions, but if I'm asked "what do you think about ...?" I don't know what to say because most of the time I genuinely don't know what I think.
When writing essays at university I had difficulty with open-ended questions. Multiple-choice questions were easier because you don't have to come up with an answer yourself. Anything that requires me to organise my thoughts into a coherent answer I find very difficult. |
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psychegots
Deinonychus
Joined: Oct 04, 2011
Posts: 338
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| Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 6:53 am Post subject: |
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| enrico_dandolo wrote: | which I find quite uninteresting, especially since the answer is always the same to all these questions (respectivally: "Nothing interesting", "It's on my schedule on the fridge", "Yes", "It's food", "Somewhere in the future", "Which?"/"Yes").
I think Davuardo is right, however. I just don't understand the interest. |
Second that...!
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Ria1989
Deinonychus
Joined: Feb 19, 2011
Posts: 336
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| Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 10:21 am Post subject: |
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| Davuardo wrote: | I wonder if your dad just asks you these questions because he is looking for an excuse to talk to you
Remember, neurotypicals don't do things on face value, he probably doesn't give two hoots about your tax tips, he just wants a conversation. |
Yep. That happens all the time. |
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Tequila
Trust the people!
Joined: Feb 26, 2006
Posts: 26045
Location: Lancashire, UK
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| Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 10:25 am Post subject: |
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| Yes. Including the question you just asked me. |
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Blindspot149
Phoenix
Joined: Oct 08, 2009
Posts: 2516
Location: Aspergers Quadrant, INTJ, AQ 45/50
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| Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 11:25 am Post subject: |
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I am much more comfortable with questions if I have been given some advance notice/warning.
- Particularly business meetings
One thing I despise is being ambushed with questions over a 'business lunch'
Which idiot first got the idea of a working lunch/dinner/breakfast?
- Gobbling food between soundbites
- Talk about an anxiety trip
I generally prefer to eat alone, unless with my family.
When the food arrives at a 'business lunch' I sometimes feel like throwing the plate of food at the wall, turning the other person and inviting them to commence their interrogation.
Business meeting - cup of coffee, glass of water
Meal time - shut up and let me eat my food in peace!
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mindmapper
Blue Jay
Joined: Feb 17, 2012
Posts: 86
Location: Netherlands
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| Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 11:37 am Post subject: |
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To me, the worst kind of questions are redundant questions. My was always good at these, for example, a question he would always ask when he went to bed and I was the only one left awake:
him: "Do you want to watch TV?"
me: "No"
him: "So I can turn it off?"
me: "I don't want to watch TV, so yes you can turn it off"
It's the same question in a different coat, it's so inefficient it annoys me a lot. No matter how many times I told him the second question was redundant, he would always do it again. Argh.
Also the 'little questions' often asked by parents are annoying, as enrico pointed out. I don't mind one or a few of these, but there would always so many of them, and they distract me from whatever I'm thinking about. |
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