TB
Phoenix
Joined: Oct 06, 2008
Age: 23
Posts: 531
Location: netherlands
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 Posted: Sun Mar 18, 2012 5:22 pm Post subject: |
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I do not feel socially starved, i think i have enough interaction. The problem is that i need to connect to people on a deeper level. Just talking about random gossip or the weather is not fulfilling this need i have.
The loneliness doesn't come from social starvation just the fact that i have no deep connections with any people, or they are very short lasting. Getting a glimpse at it, leaves me with a hole afterwards.
Lately this nervous or unsatisfied undertone i don't know what it is but its negative has come on again. My conclusion is that the more i have superficial interaction the more i have a need to connect on a deeper level as well. So i am going back to basics. No social media for at least a week, and trying to ice up again. Basically going into hermit mode. |
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smen
Butterfly
Joined: Mar 11, 2012
Posts: 16
Location: mn
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| Posted: Sun Mar 18, 2012 7:11 pm Post subject: breaking |
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| I am going to break....I'm breaking right now.....I have been reaching out for help and support on here because I do not have friends and my family would just have me locked up again. The past few weeks everything has been making me cry. I need to escape and i don't know how. |
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fobfan123
Snowy Owl
Joined: May 01, 2010
Posts: 143
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| Posted: Sun Mar 18, 2012 9:10 pm Post subject: |
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| yeah I'm totally feeling like that, but like someone else said I have a few online friends that I can chat with if I get too bored or stuff. hang in there! have you tried reading something, even if you don't like books you can a read a magazine, or the onion news (fake news) and it may give you a laugh and help put ur mind onto something else. |
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smen
Butterfly
Joined: Mar 11, 2012
Posts: 16
Location: mn
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| Posted: Sun Mar 18, 2012 9:13 pm Post subject: lol |
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| thanks but books are not a long term solution. and after 25 years, they are not a solution at all. my problem is not that I am bored or have nothing to do. It is that i am lonely and alone and lack the social skills to adequately do anything about it due to a lifelong syndrome that will never go away. |
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namaste
Enigmatic Charismatically Odd
Joined: Apr 15, 2011
Posts: 1841
Location: Hindustan
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| Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 7:43 am Post subject: |
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i prefer having 1-2 close friends rather then a group
i cant fit in any group and conversation in groups go faster which i cant pick up
if someone sits and talks with me or share their thoughts then i find it relaxing
but too many people, loud noise, trying to keep a conversation going is stressful
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The only thing right in this wrong world is
WRONG PLANET |
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SteveBorg
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Dec 21, 2008
Age: 45
Posts: 74
Location: Chicago, IL
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Zexion
Snowy Owl
Joined: Feb 06, 2011
Posts: 128
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| Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 12:14 pm Post subject: |
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| Mayel wrote: | | Zexion wrote: |
Do you daydream and listen to music while you're walking? Why do you walk 2 hours a day?
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Although this question wasn't directed towards me....I do that, too. Not 2 hours though. 1 hour is enough. I listen to music while walking. And I do that because this is the time when I can introspectively think about myself, my life, my feelings, but also the environment surrounding me, other people, what they think, how they might feel, philosophical and exestential stuff, encounters, the past, future and present...etc. Usually I'm busy doing things (related to my interests) so walking outside is the only time of the day I am really looking deeply into myself and others. It's the time I use to process everything I've gathered so far concerning the social realities of life. Music shields me from outside interference to this internal processing.
Anyway, 18 is not getting old. You still have plenty of time. If you go out into the world,...maybe do some "extracurricular activities", recreational activities, people may approach you. You never know. There's no point in giving up hope so early in life. |
I asked because listening to music while pacing or walking is a sign of "Maladaptive Daydreaming Disorder" (which I have).
The only thing I do during my free time besides sitting infront of the computer is going running at least 4 times a week. I love running, I've been doing that for almost 3 years now, but the problem is that I'm always doing it in on my own. I don't get to know anyone while running in the woods. I did try some sports clubs as a kid (takewondo, tennis, football) and I always eventually left because I embarassed myself during the lessons and I was an outsider there as well.
| TB wrote: | | The problem is that i need to connect to people on a deeper level. Just talking about random gossip or the weather is not fulfilling this need i have. |
Yeah, I feel the same. I find it hard to think of something interesting to talk about. I do have special interests but noone else would be interested in those.
| TB wrote: | | Basically going into hermit mode. |
Going into hermit mode is just not the solution... I am tired of always going into hermit mode.
Thanks for that link. I'll check it out. |
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starimmanuel
Emu Egg
Joined: Nov 27, 2011
Age: 24
Posts: 3
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| Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 3:49 pm Post subject: |
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i always feel such a outcast when im outside the house i never just seem to click with people   |
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Gazelle
Crossword Aficionado
Joined: Mar 09, 2012
Posts: 1643
Location: Tropical island
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| Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 9:06 pm Post subject: Feeling Lonely |
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Yes I do often feel lonely since I am single and Sunday is the worst day for me. It seems to help that I attend group activities with people who I have a common interest. For example, going to Meet Up Groups. Some meet up groups I connect better with than others.
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"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate, but that we are powerful beyond measure." |
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lilbetta
Snowy Owl
Joined: Apr 10, 2012
Age: 22
Posts: 153
Location: my own lil world
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| Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 1:37 pm Post subject: I really was recntly too |
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| i recent ly got this same feeling of lonliness but they just amped up my depression meds and this week has been a drstic difference from the last few months... yay. i still feel lonely especially when meds wear off but it is not as bad so far its much better. |
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i_wanna_blue
Within
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Joined: Aug 10, 2008
Age: 28
Posts: 7714
Location: Alone
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| Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 6:36 pm Post subject: |
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| I think loneliness has a lot to do with purpose and meaning in our lives. For myself I can safely say I have not one person in the world who truly cares for me or values my existence. That's why i feel lonely, as having a meaningful existence will lead to me being valued by others. I suppose having a true purpose (which generally tends to involve others) makes one feel in someway part of society. When you have very restrictive, individually based dreams and aspirations it tends to lead to loneliness in my opinion. I'm not saying that anyone whose lonely is hated by everyone else, or is a completely void of ambition, but if we tend to let very little in to our own individual world, we limit our chances of forming part of something beyond ourselves. |
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Nerdyimperator
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Feb 25, 2012
Posts: 61
Location: Scotland
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| Posted: Sat Apr 21, 2012 12:32 pm Post subject: |
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I feel the same, pretty much all of my friends (NT's all!) are either forming romantic relationships or moving away leaving me feeling isolated and very much alone. Hopefully I can change that soon.  |
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YourMajesty
Sea Gull
Joined: Apr 02, 2012
Age: 21
Posts: 211
Location: Not in the US
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| Posted: Wed Apr 25, 2012 7:29 am Post subject: |
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| I feel socially satisfied because I'm around 4+ days a week with my boyfriend. But besides him (who used to be a friend) there isn't anyone. I do think that's unhealthy, but I'm clueless on how to fix that. |
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