FishStickNick
Phoenix
Joined: Apr 05, 2012
Posts: 957
Location: My own head
|
 Posted: Fri Apr 06, 2012 2:24 am Post subject: |
 |
|
| The only people I really feel like me around are close family members and maybe a small number of close friends. Even then, I have to retreat to a quiet room for a while (which my family members see as rude sometimes). Aside from that, I generally avoid unnecessary contact, or if I do communicate with them, it's over instant message or email. Phone calls are evil. I won't answer it unless absolutely necessary. |
|
| Back to top |
|
League_Girl
Proud mamma
Joined: Feb 05, 2010
Posts: 13495
Location: My house
|
| Posted: Fri Apr 06, 2012 2:32 am Post subject: |
|
|
| I loved being around people when I was a kid and now I don't really care anymore. If I am around people, I do my own thing. |
|
| Back to top |
|
Dillogic
you know how it goes
Joined: Nov 25, 2011
Posts: 3325
|
| Posted: Fri Apr 06, 2012 3:21 am Post subject: |
|
|
No
I'm only alone when I'm around people. |
|
| Back to top |
|
MagicMeerkat
meerkat
Joined: Jun 12, 2011
Age: 26
Posts: 1347
Location: Kalahari Desert
|
| Posted: Fri Apr 06, 2012 4:32 pm Post subject: |
|
|
No, I perfer to be alone. People usualy bore me and if I can't talk about my obsessions/special intrests I feel like I'm going to suffocate. Some obessions/special intrests I don't like to dicuss with people who aren't alreadly famaliar with them. I HATE having to explain things when I know the person isn't going to put any effort into retaining it. I don't have any desire for friendship or romance and when it comes to the whole social aspect, schizoid personality disorder decribes me better than autism. If it wasn't for the obsessions and sensory intergration disorder, Schizoid would probably be a more accurate diagnosis. I do wonder though if schizoid is just an outdated description of AS or HFA in adults.
_________________
"So for all of you with the courage to stand up and say "I am me, screw you, World if you don't like it!" Here's to you!
-Erik Sprague
|
|
| Back to top |
|
WerewolfPoet
Deinonychus
Joined: Mar 04, 2012
Posts: 361
|
| Posted: Fri Apr 06, 2012 5:54 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| I'm indifferent either way, to be perfectly honest: though I value people and the interesting aspects they can bring with them, I do not mind being alone for an extended period of time. By nature, I am probably more introverted than extroverted and would probably lean more towards isolationism should I be left to my own devises; being raised in the environment that I was raised in, however, I have come to adapt to the presence of others and actually find something to enjoy in every social interaction. |
|
| Back to top |
|
glider18
Supporting Member
Joined: Nov 09, 2008
Posts: 6700
Location: Ohio
|
| Posted: Fri Apr 06, 2012 7:47 pm Post subject: people |
|
|
Growing up I always tended to enjoy family gatherings. Many times we had events where much of my mother's side of the family gathered. Those were fun times. My family was quite interesting and eccentric. My mother's side of the family definitely shows evidence of the autism gene I inherited.
I also had a best friend growing up. We were like brothers. And although he lives hundreds of miles away today, when we get together it feels like just yesterday we played together.
However, being around people that weren't family tended to be very awkward for me---and it still is. Now that most of the older generations of my family have died off, and my best friend is away, I don't socialize much at all. I prefer it that way now.
_________________
"My journey has just begun." |
|
| Back to top |
|
Matt62
Phoenix
Joined: Jan 05, 2012
Age: 51
Posts: 1159
|
| Posted: Fri Apr 06, 2012 8:40 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Yes. A thousand times over, YES!
Every time I have felt let down by other people. Or that I just could not relate to the thinks they see to think are important.
Sincerely,
Matthew |
|
| Back to top |
|
IdahoRose
Imaginary Friend
![]()
Joined: Feb 25, 2007
Age: 22
Posts: 18651
|
| Posted: Fri Apr 06, 2012 8:52 pm Post subject: |
|
|
My mom said that when I was a child, I was very quiet and preferred to play myself, usually talking to my imaginary friends. I remember getting irritated at my younger brother because he always wanted me to play with him, when I always wanted to be left alone. Same with my friends at school - they were very clingy and wanted my attention constantly, and I felt smothered by them. I absolutely hate family gatherings and company coming to our house, and I can't stand crowds. If my family members are home from work/school for prolonged periods of time, I start to feel irritated by their presence.
But I am not a completely solitary person - overall I enjoy living with my family members, eating dinner with them, running errands with them and most of all, just talking to them. I am extremely emotionally attached to my mom, and if she works many long shifts in a row at her job or if she has to go out of town due to family issues, I become much more prone to meltdowns. If the house is empty for too long, I start feeling lonely.
tl;dr - Both too much alone time and too much socializing aren't good for me. I need to maintain a balance between the two in order to feel my best. |
|
| Back to top |
|
FishStickNick
Phoenix
Joined: Apr 05, 2012
Posts: 957
Location: My own head
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2012 12:16 am Post subject: |
|
|
I'm in my late 20s, and at this stage, I doubt I'll ever have a "typical" romantic relationship. I'm asexual, I have a hard time outwardly expressing love toward others (the phrase "I love you" is not part of my vocabulary), and the thought of kissing someone just seems...unpleasant.
I generally prefer to be alone, but I do enjoy being around people from time to time even if I don't have much to talk about with them. At work, for example, I'll go between working in my cubicle and working in an open area with a laptop. That arrangement works well for me because I have some contact with others, but when I've had my fill, I can go retreat and hide in my cubicle.  |
|
| Back to top |
|
AardvarkGoodSwimmer
Phoenix
Joined: Apr 27, 2009
Age: 50
Posts: 4902
Location: Houston, Texas
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2012 12:57 am Post subject: |
|
|
| CockneyRebel wrote: | | I've always enjoyed being around people. I always got excited when my family had company over. |
That was kind of my experience, too. It was exciting meeting a new person, who was engaged and interested in meeting us.
At some point , maybe about three hours into it, my energy would slump rather abruptly. |
|
| Back to top |
|
Blindspot149
Phoenix
Joined: Oct 08, 2009
Posts: 2516
Location: Aspergers Quadrant, INTJ, AQ 45/50
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2012 3:13 am Post subject: |
|
|
Your thread question is in the past tense and so my answer is yes, I did used to want to be around people.
I was never much good at 'being around' the other kids at school but I did enjoy the company of older people, usually my parents' friends, as well as younger people.
I have put a lot of effort into 'being around' other people, particularly when I was around them socially, but always knew that it wasn't really paying off in any remotely meaningful way.
Since learning about my Asperger's a little under 3 years ago, this all now makes perfect sense.
I have now become so much less concerned about socializing, to the point where I have lost all interest in it, other than with my family.
I suppose if I had friends, I would probably have some enthusiasm in being around them.
But since I don't, I know that social interactions are just fleeting moments with strangers, that will lead nowhere whilst creating high anxiety.
So now, other than my work and my family, I prefer not to be around people.
_________________
Now then, tell me. What did Miggs say to you? Multiple Miggs in the next cell. He hissed at you. What did he say?
Last edited by Blindspot149 on Sun Apr 08, 2012 12:13 am; edited 1 time in total |
|
| Back to top |
|
MagicMeerkat
meerkat
Joined: Jun 12, 2011
Age: 26
Posts: 1347
Location: Kalahari Desert
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2012 12:14 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| IdahoRose wrote: | My mom said that when I was a child, I was very quiet and preferred to play myself, usually talking to my imaginary friends. I remember getting irritated at my younger brother because he always wanted me to play with him, when I always wanted to be left alone. Same with my friends at school - they were very clingy and wanted my attention constantly, and I felt smothered by them. I absolutely hate family gatherings and company coming to our house, and I can't stand crowds. If my family members are home from work/school for prolonged periods of time, I start to feel irritated by their presence.
But I am not a completely solitary person - overall I enjoy living with my family members, eating dinner with them, running errands with them and most of all, just talking to them. I am extremely emotionally attached to my mom, and if she works many long shifts in a row at her job or if she has to go out of town due to family issues, I become much more prone to meltdowns. If the house is empty for too long, I start feeling lonely.
tl;dr - Both too much alone time and too much socializing aren't good for me. I need to maintain a balance between the two in order to feel my best. |
I always regret going to family gatherings.
_________________
"So for all of you with the courage to stand up and say "I am me, screw you, World if you don't like it!" Here's to you!
-Erik Sprague
|
|
| Back to top |
|
Sjofnn
Emu Egg
Joined: Apr 27, 2012
Posts: 2
Location: Canada
|
| Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2012 7:05 pm Post subject: |
|
|
I couldn't stand being around people when I was a child, far preferring solitude or the company of animals. My budgies were my best friends until we got a dog, and then I spent most of my time with him. I was often asked why I didn't go play with the other kids, but I really had no desire to do so: I had books, and art supplies, and my animal friends.
Once I was in highschool, I learned to "play the game" so I could fit in as much as possible--I put on a big smile, and learned how to nod at the right times, and force myself to go do social things, but social interaction with others just ...drains me. It's all an act, it's all forced.
I do have a few close friends, and my husband and I spend most of our time together, but there's a great deal of companionable silence. I think I'd be the happiest person in the world if I could just move out to a secluded cabin out in the middle of nowhere with just my husband, my half-sister (also ASD), and a plethora of animal companions. So long as I have silence, an endless supply of books, tea, and yarn, I'm happy. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
