|
| Would you prefer an NT child or one on the spectrum |
| NT |
|
48% |
[ 51 ] |
| On the spectrum |
|
51% |
[ 55 ] |
|
| Total Votes : 106 |
|
webcam
Velociraptor
Joined: Feb 09, 2012
Posts: 427
|
 Posted: Thu Apr 05, 2012 1:25 pm Post subject: Re: Are you afraid of having a child be on the spectrum? |
 |
|
| amusedviews wrote: | This is for women and men, even, who WANT children. I do know that there are plenty of AS people who don't want children. So please no comments like "Oh doesn't matter to me I don't want children."
But if you do have more of an opinion than that please post it.
I had a very rough time in school. Most of my teachers liked me but thought I was lazy and just didn't work hard enough. I was made fun of because of thinking differently. I was spoken down to by many a special ed teacher. Not all but man I have seen some special ed teachers who needed to find another line of work due to their persistent negative attitude toward the students. Sorry off topic.
And I don't say that for sympathy as I am sure many of you faced similar problems. But when I think of when I am older and have a child, I am terrified that they will suffer a similar fate. I very badly want an NT child so that they dont go through that. I know that even if they were NT they could still go through the same issues but the likeliness would be much less for an NT.
I am not sorry though to have Aspergers. It makes me who I am and how creative and out of the box I can be. But still the world is much easier for an NT since that is how the world is wired and I would prefer my child have an easier go than me.
But what does everyone here think? Would you prefer an NT or a child on the spectrum? |
I said on the spectrum, but it should be taken to mean neurodiverse in general. |
|
| Back to top |
|
League_Girl
Proud mamma
Joined: Feb 05, 2010
Posts: 13669
Location: My house
|
| Posted: Thu Apr 05, 2012 1:38 pm Post subject: Re: Reblogging> this post |
|
|
| AspieRogue wrote: | | melisa27 wrote: | | Go a head abor me all you please because I would have been more grateful for both myself and for my own children to have been Nt so screw your opinion. AspieRouge. Leauge_Girl or anyone else that won't agree with me. There is a major lack of funding for all people on the HFA spectrum threw private agencies and I was misdiagnosed for a large majority of my life span until a year and a half ago out out today. I'm replying to this post out of my past experience with our society and the large budget cuts all over the world besides the bay area where I live in. And had to go threw that painful process of being sterilized just to stop the spread of autism. It beats getting an abortion done any day of the week. I'm well aware of this either being in the norm of T.M.I. or NSW or whatever else you may call it. But your forgetting the fact that most if not all Aspies feel like lower functioning individuals whom are shunned upon by our own societies threw history as well as the media. This discouragement only makes all people HFA still less understood and even feel worse about themselves. And how most families feel that have special needed children. THERE THE WORST. |
I'm actually glad that you got sterilized so there is no possibility of you bringing any NT kids into this world. 
All this whining and self-pity from moms, moms-to-be, and potential moms ITT. You people need to grow up. |
Obviously this part of my post was ignored:
| Quote: |
Kid on the spectrum who be mild AS. I prefer mild. But I'd also be happy with an NT child. So far mine is normal and I am happy the way he is. I vowed to myself I won't be disappointed if he turns out to not be on the spectrum. Besides it feels wrong to hope for a special needs child. Why would someone want their kid to have a disability? |
[b]
People will focus more on something they want and ignore the rest that was written. |
|
| Back to top |
|
Joker
Sinn Fein
Joined: Mar 20, 2011
Age: 24
Posts: 7593
Location: North Carolina The Tar Heel State :)
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2012 2:50 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| AspieRogue wrote: | It's clear to me that those Aspie women ITT who wish to have children who are NT(and thus not like them) have serious issues with self-loathing. I wonder if it's due their social conditioning and being more sensitive to disapproval from others. I mean, they view their OWN condition as a bad thing as opposed to being part of who they are(as I do). How pathetic is that??? 
Isn't it interesting that the few aspie men who posted ITT say they'd rather have a kid who is like them(aspie).......I honestly wonder why. |
'
I think they see you that way to AspieRogue to say such things to the women on WP is very hurtful
But I would prefer my future child being a aspie I can teach him or her to view it as a gift the way I do. |
|
| Back to top |
|
Joker
Sinn Fein
Joined: Mar 20, 2011
Age: 24
Posts: 7593
Location: North Carolina The Tar Heel State :)
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2012 6:31 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| AspieRogue wrote: | | Joker wrote: | | AspieRogue wrote: | It's clear to me that those Aspie women ITT who wish to have children who are NT(and thus not like them) have serious issues with self-loathing. I wonder if it's due their social conditioning and being more sensitive to disapproval from others. I mean, they view their OWN condition as a bad thing as opposed to being part of who they are(as I do). How pathetic is that???
Isn't it interesting that the few aspie men who posted ITT say they'd rather have a kid who is like them(aspie).......I honestly wonder why. |
'
I think they see you that way too AspieRogue. to say such things to the women on WP is very hurtful
|
Well Joker, I'm expressing my honest opinion. I believe that there's a lot more to it than what they're actually saying. |
Nothing against you personaly you just at times come off as bitter that is my honest opinon.
though I would so love a child who has asperger syndrome. If he or she is anything like me school will be easy for them. |
|
| Back to top |
|
Joker
Sinn Fein
Joined: Mar 20, 2011
Age: 24
Posts: 7593
Location: North Carolina The Tar Heel State :)
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2012 8:57 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| AspieRogue wrote: | | Joker wrote: | | AspieRogue wrote: | | Joker wrote: | | AspieRogue wrote: | It's clear to me that those Aspie women ITT who wish to have children who are NT(and thus not like them) have serious issues with self-loathing. I wonder if it's due their social conditioning and being more sensitive to disapproval from others. I mean, they view their OWN condition as a bad thing as opposed to being part of who they are(as I do). How pathetic is that???
Isn't it interesting that the few aspie men who posted ITT say they'd rather have a kid who is like them(aspie).......I honestly wonder why. |
'
I think they see you that way too AspieRogue. to say such things to the women on WP is very hurtful
|
Well Joker, I'm expressing my honest opinion. I believe that there's a lot more to it than what they're actually saying. |
Nothing against you personaly you just at times come off as bitter that is my honest opinon.
|
Well, you're partially right about that.And other seeing aspies reject their own kind by wishing that THEIR children won't be aspies certainly contributes to my feelings of bitterness. |
I dislike that to trust me I would rather bring a aspie into this world then I would a NT I prefer it that way to. |
|
| Back to top |
|
ExcitinglyOpaque
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Apr 08, 2012
Age: 48
Posts: 56
Location: Kentucky
|
| Posted: Sun Apr 08, 2012 7:01 pm Post subject: |
|
|
No, I wasn't afraid of having disabled children. My mother didn't want me to have children, but (very unlike her) I was born to be a mother. Realizing before I had children that I wouldn't think less of my children, I started having faith in myself again.
My husband and I are both autistic and dyslexic, and I have other disabilities as well. As for the kids,
Daughter, 17: ADHD, hyperlexic, and undiagnosed autistic
Nephew (Adopting), 14: Autistic
Daughter, 8-going-on-9: Dyslexic
Daughter, 7: Autistic
Son, 2-going-on-3: Neurotypical until further notice
Daughter, 2-going-on-3: Autistic
Daughter, 2-going-on-3: Autistic w/ hypersensitivity and anxiety
Daughter, newborn: Too soon to tell
Daughter, newborn: Too soon to tell
Yep, that's three two-year-olds and two newborns. |
|
| Back to top |
|
Aspiestar924
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Feb 03, 2009
Posts: 39
Location: Yorkshire, United Kingdom
|
| Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 1:21 pm Post subject: Re: Are you afraid of having a child be on the spectrum? |
|
|
I don't necessarily want children, however, if I did change my mind for me a child's neurological-type is not relevant. I've never even thought would I prefer an AS or NT child, nor have I considered the possibility of having Aspie kids that much. I've just felt that raising a child with love, knowledge and the guidance for life they need to know and to accept them regardless is the main thing.
_________________
'Who threw the first stone spear? It wasn't the social type people chatting around the campfire. It was the Asperger's.'
-Temple Grandin
Your Aspie score: 193 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 43 of 200 |
|
| Back to top |
|
Aspiestar924
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Feb 03, 2009
Posts: 39
Location: Yorkshire, United Kingdom
|
| Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 1:23 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Lots of kids there. Must be hard work but a blessing too 
| ExcitinglyOpaque wrote: | No, I wasn't afraid of having disabled children. My mother didn't want me to have children, but (very unlike her) I was born to be a mother. Realizing before I had children that I wouldn't think less of my children, I started having faith in myself again.
My husband and I are both autistic and dyslexic, and I have other disabilities as well. As for the kids,
Daughter, 17: ADHD, hyperlexic, and undiagnosed autistic
Nephew (Adopting), 14: Autistic
Daughter, 8-going-on-9: Dyslexic
Daughter, 7: Autistic
Son, 2-going-on-3: Neurotypical until further notice
Daughter, 2-going-on-3: Autistic
Daughter, 2-going-on-3: Autistic w/ hypersensitivity and anxiety
Daughter, newborn: Too soon to tell
Daughter, newborn: Too soon to tell
Yep, that's three two-year-olds and two newborns. |
_________________
'Who threw the first stone spear? It wasn't the social type people chatting around the campfire. It was the Asperger's.'
-Temple Grandin
Your Aspie score: 193 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 43 of 200 |
|
| Back to top |
|
Wandering_Stranger
Phoenix
Joined: Apr 07, 2012
Posts: 1191
|
| Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 6:24 pm Post subject: |
|
|
I'm more concerned about any potential future children of mine developing epilepsy, which is genetic on my father's side of the family.
I'm unsure. I guess as someone who isn't NT and sees the word differently, I'd rather have that. |
|
| Back to top |
|
Joe90
Phoenix
Joined: Feb 24, 2010
Posts: 8417
Location: Great Britain
|
| Posted: Fri Apr 13, 2012 4:11 pm Post subject: |
|
|
I want an NT child. I think it's cruel to bring a child into this world and put them through the same sh** I had to put up with all my life. And I will be able to relate to it if it was NT, because my mum's NT and I can relate to her, I'm really close to her and she's really close to me.
But not only that - it's the abnormalcy AS brings in the home. A lot of people with AS are angry, or anxious, or depressed, or irritable. I know I am, and I get stressed out over unusual things what others wouldn't, and it upsets the household, and so this will be what I'll have to deal with if I have an Aspie child. I get upset over things like the kitchen drawer not being completely shut. Seeing it almost shut but not quite shut really upsets me, and sometimes I punch it shut in a temper. I just don't feel right until it's completely shut. And there are things what make me want to roll on the floor screaming and crying at aswell. And I don't want my child to have this behaviour. I want normality. I feel so sorry for my mum, I think half the reason why I hate myself is from guilt of all the stress I have caused my mum over the years of growing up.
Also, it is very upsetting when your child doesn't have any friends at school - especially when they are born to desire friendships but can't seem to fit in. It's upsetting for the child and the parents. I know I had the same experience when I was a kid, especially when I got to High School. I used to cry a lot and long for a friend, but nobody would be my friend. Well, I did have friendships on and off, but they weren't proper friendships, I never got invited out at week-ends, and I was never really treated as a proper friend, I was just there for them to use when they didn't have anybody else (ie their real friends are absent or have temporarily fallen out or got a boyfriend or something). It made me feel so miserable that each week-end and holiday I was lonely, and it was hurtful for my mum too. Thank god I had cousins who came up and played with me, but I couldn't rely on them all the time because they were NTs and so had friends of their own, and I couldn't stop them from having other friends (although I did get horribly jealous). I really don't want my child to go through this same sh**, because it is very likely that an Aspie child has more chance of experiencing this than an NT child has.
_________________
Real gender: Female
From: East UK
Age: 23 |
|
| Back to top |
|
PastFixations
One who will open the door.
Joined: Sep 22, 2011
Posts: 2697
|
| Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 2:00 pm Post subject: |
|
|
I'll be supportive to my child/children whether they are AS, NT or anything else for that matter.
_________________
www.wrongplanet.net/postp5013377.html&highlight=#5013377
Sora: "My friends are my power."
Ventus: "I'm asking you as a friend. Just... put an end to me." |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
