Sirius
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Apr 17, 2010
Posts: 63
Location: Fresno, CA
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 Posted: Sun Apr 22, 2012 9:00 pm Post subject: |
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| PastFixations wrote: | I feel sorry for this guy since he's come on here asking a question and he must feel teased about being a 40 year old who happens to be a virgin.
Sirius, I think that you should be better off since that way when that special someone comes along. She will feel much more happy because you waited that long.
You need some self confidence. |
Actually, it is not confidence but competence. I am at a total lost in small talk and unless the conversation involves facts and stats, I don't know what to say. Imagine a confident person being thrown into the cockpit of an airplane, no matter how much they believe in themselves if they don't know how to fly an airplane they are very unlikely to push buttons right and left at random. That is me, I am at a loss socially, I can believe in myself to the ends of this Earth but if I don't know basic socialization, then I am still a deer in the headlights. |
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solo
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Mar 22, 2012
Posts: 34
Location: cleveland ohio
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| Posted: Sun Apr 22, 2012 11:50 pm Post subject: |
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I'm 27 and nothin for me either  Something I will never admit to anyone I know because the ones I know will look down on me for it. I cannot talk to women, and I very rarely get any chance to meet them because A-work a lot, B-too tired at the end of work to go anywhere, C-don't have anyone I can call a "friend" to go places with, only accuaintences. I don't like going places alone most of the time. I don't fit in anywhere so I mainly keep to myself, but when an oppurtunity comes along to possibly connect with someone, I do my best to try. I am not into casual sex, only with someone if I am in a commited relationship. I am dead against cheating also. Never had a relationship so here I am. Had an oppurtunity for sex once but didn't go for it because she was not into being faithful at all, so I passed. I fear that my no-knowledge of society and relationships has screwed me big time and that it may be too late to ever find happiness. I have always wanted the things that most want, wife / soulmate (lol) love, family, the works, but with being who I am I am kinda giving up hope at this point in my life. My mom used to say that she wants grandkids from me all the time for years. Now she hasn't said it in a few years. People know. I want way more than sex, I want the whole damn package. My bro just tells me to buy a hooker. That goes against everything I thought of. |
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Roninninja
Snowy Owl
Joined: Apr 16, 2012
Posts: 135
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| Posted: Mon Apr 23, 2012 12:54 am Post subject: |
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25 year old virgin here. The worst part is that i've come close a few times, i'm just always to shy to make that final and crucial move.
_________________
Your Aspie score: 159 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 51 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie |
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Tim_Tex
Professor Hineybottom
Joined: Jul 03, 2004
Age: 33
Posts: 41865
Location: Houston, Texas
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| Posted: Mon Apr 23, 2012 12:58 am Post subject: |
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Count me out, lost it at 29.
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<<<=== This is not the devil, this is the Red Guy from Cow and Chicken. |
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PastFixations
One who will open the door.
Joined: Sep 22, 2011
Posts: 2697
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| Posted: Mon Apr 23, 2012 5:42 am Post subject: |
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@Sirius
You mean to say that when you approach a woman, your most likely response is quite robotic?
Woman: How are you?
You: Statistically 78% of people in the world are happy and content with their lives. I'm happy at this moment in time which makes the statistics very logically correct.
*Woman leaves*
Tell me it's not THAT bad?
_________________
www.wrongplanet.net/postp5013377.html&highlight=#5013377
Sora: "My friends are my power."
Ventus: "I'm asking you as a friend. Just... put an end to me." |
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Kinme
Dinosaurlicious
Joined: Apr 14, 2012
Posts: 3223
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| Posted: Mon Apr 23, 2012 5:42 pm Post subject: |
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| PastFixations wrote: | @Sirius
You mean to say that when you approach a woman, your most likely response is quite robotic?
Woman: How are you?
You: Statistically 78% of people in the world are happy and content with their lives. I'm happy at this moment in time which makes the statistics very logically correct.
*Woman leaves*
Tell me it's not THAT bad? |
I would fall in love with the person who said that to me. |
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JonnyBoy
Butterfly
Joined: Mar 01, 2012
Posts: 13
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| Posted: Mon Apr 23, 2012 11:52 pm Post subject: |
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I'm only 26, but the way things are going I'll be a 40-year-old virgin soon enough. I'm terrified of asking a woman out on a date, and I'm more likely to win the lottery than have a woman ask me out.
The lack of sex doesn't bother me that much, though; I'm more frustrated with the stigma attached to male virginity. A man has to have lots of sex to be successful, but has to be successful. How is that even supposed to work? |
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blunnet
Phoenix
Joined: Apr 04, 2011
Posts: 926
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| Posted: Tue Apr 24, 2012 12:11 am Post subject: |
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| If it wasn't for paid sex services I would have become a 40 year old and 60 year old virgin. |
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The_Face_of_Boo
A savage
Joined: Jun 17, 2010
Age: 31
Posts: 9282
Location: Beirut ,Lebanon
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| Posted: Tue Apr 24, 2012 10:04 am Post subject: |
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| AussieMatty wrote: | | Geeze I would not like to read this thread. I would not wanted to be 40 year old virgin. Thats so disgusting lifestyle. Thank you very much to give me a nightmare... |
I wouldn't call it 'disgusting' but a such late virginity is not a lifestyle by itself but it's most probably a one consequence (ie same as not having many friends, outings...etc) of a prolonged unhealthy and unbalanced social-wise lifestyle.
:-/ not wanting to sound like complaining but it's really the truth. |
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Taybot97
Pileated woodpecker
Joined: Feb 23, 2012
Posts: 186
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| Posted: Tue Apr 24, 2012 11:15 am Post subject: |
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| I'm nowhere near 40 (15) but I've only hugged 2 girls for more than just saying "hi" or "bye" (which only happens in family anyway) Neither of them a girl I have dated or have thought about dating. Never kissed a girl, or gotten close. Never held ones hand. Basically I've only asked a girl out and awkwardly had my hand on her leg for about 5 seconds. I'd call this a good start to 30+ or even 40+ year old virgin. Unless I actually decide to go to a party and where a drunk girl is in college, unlikely as I hate parties like that. |
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myth
Phoenix
Joined: Oct 17, 2011
Age: 27
Posts: 707
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| Posted: Tue Apr 24, 2012 1:47 pm Post subject: |
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^ 15 is nothing. Don't jump on the perpetual virgin train just yet.
Sex/relationships are a whole new can of worms and raise their own challenges. I wish everyone here could be able to understand what is good about being single/a virgin but you probably won't appreciate it until you've been on the other side. It's a "grass is greener" sort of thing.
Being asexual or being able to be happy with being single would have saved me a WORLD of problems in my life and I'd be much better off in many ways.
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Non-NT something. Married to a diagnosed aspie.
Nothing is absolute. |
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bumble
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 27, 2011
Posts: 1389
Location: Norfolk, UK
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| Posted: Tue Apr 24, 2012 2:12 pm Post subject: |
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| PastFixations wrote: | @Sirius
You mean to say that when you approach a woman, your most likely response is quite robotic?
Woman: How are you?
You: Statistically 78% of people in the world are happy and content with their lives. I'm happy at this moment in time which makes the statistics very logically correct.
*Woman leaves*
Tell me it's not THAT bad? |
Well if it is that bad it's more interesting than someone saying 'it is a nice sunny day today' when I can see that for myself lol. I don't keep up with weather forecasts very often (what is the obsession with the weather about?)
Really, I am more likely to be amused in a good way if someone walked up to me and said what you just posted! Would get my attention but then I am strange.
And on the topic of the thread, female but not a virgin since I was 17.
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For cross stitching, tapestry, other arts and crafts and the upcoming shark kingdom when I get around to it, visit: www.bumbleshobbyhome.blogspot.com |
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The_Face_of_Boo
A savage
Joined: Jun 17, 2010
Age: 31
Posts: 9282
Location: Beirut ,Lebanon
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| Posted: Tue Apr 24, 2012 2:57 pm Post subject: |
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| myth wrote: | ^ 15 is nothing. Don't jump on the perpetual virgin train just yet.
Sex/relationships are a whole new can of worms and raise their own challenges. I wish everyone here could be able to understand what is good about being single/a virgin but you probably won't appreciate it until you've been on the other side. It's a "grass is greener" sort of thing.
Being asexual or being able to be happy with being single would have saved me a WORLD of problems in my life and I'd be much better off in many ways. |
Of course, we're not talking about the asexual cases.
You too are unable to comprehend the adult virgins here because you've never experienced a life till adulthood without the adult "rites of passages" experiences (relationships, first kiss, making out, sex...etc) or being virgin. Their 'condition' is also a "grass is greener" thing to you.
You can't understand them, they cannot understand you as well.
People who lost their virginity since 16 or 17-18 and had teen-adult experiences during their late teen period and 20s (like most people on this planet) simply CANNOT comprehend the psychological/ego impacts that 25+ adult virgins have to co-live and face. Period.
But seriously, you cannot say their condition is better than yours, you have the option to return single anytime, not happy with your husband/bf? divorce him and voilą you're single again, you have the choice, and you probably have enough experience to get a relationship easily again (without getting into the gender difference too...), while most virgins here, even those who are trying, don't have this flexibility in choices... |
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myth
Phoenix
Joined: Oct 17, 2011
Age: 27
Posts: 707
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| Posted: Tue Apr 24, 2012 3:13 pm Post subject: |
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| The_Face_of_Boo wrote: | You too are unable to comprehend the adult virgins here because you've never experienced a life till adulthood without the adult "rites of passages" experiences (relationships, first kiss, making out, sex...etc) or being virgin. Their 'condition' is also a "grass is greener" thing to you.
You can't understand them, they cannot understand you as well.
People who lost their virginity since 16 or 17-18 and had teen-adult experiences during their late teen period and 20s (like most people on this planet) simply cannot comprehend this thread. Period.
But seriously, you cannot say their condition is better than yours, you have the option to return single anytime, not happy with your husband/bf? divorce him and voilą you're single again, you have the choice, and you probably have enough experience to get a relationship easily again (without getting into the gender difference too...), while most virgins here, even those who are trying, don't have this flexibility in choices... |
You're not that much older than me, you know. Why do you assume that I lost my virginity as a teenager?
I do know what it is like because I waited until I was married in my mid twenties and then was married to a man who had NO interest in me. So, although I eventually broke that pattern of wanting sex and being unable to have it, I DO understand how it feels to be desperate for it and not able to get any.
What I am saying is that I wish people could be able to be OK with being single and not put so much emphasis on sex. It is a biological imperitive so I understand why it is so hard for people, I just wish it were not so.
Being single now would not give me back the things I lost in chasing after relationships, unfortunately. Besides, I did not say their condition was better than mine, just that there ARE some good things about it and that I wish people could be able to see it that way. And that in MY life, I can see that I would have been much better off if I hadn't placed so much emphasis on relationships because I personally sacrificed many things in this pursuit.
I'm not trying to advocate either side, I just want people to be able to be happy with who they are and what they have. Easier said than done, I know.
_________________
Non-NT something. Married to a diagnosed aspie.
Nothing is absolute.
Last edited by myth on Tue Apr 24, 2012 3:26 pm; edited 2 times in total |
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PastFixations
One who will open the door.
Joined: Sep 22, 2011
Posts: 2697
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| Posted: Tue Apr 24, 2012 3:13 pm Post subject: |
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| PastFixations wrote: | | The_Face_of_Boo wrote: |
Are you a virgin? |
Technically yes, but I did fondle so I'm not a total virgin. |
Stayed quiet since I said that, Boo.
_________________
www.wrongplanet.net/postp5013377.html&highlight=#5013377
Sora: "My friends are my power."
Ventus: "I'm asking you as a friend. Just... put an end to me." |
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