tjr1243
Deinonychus
Joined: Apr 01, 2012
Posts: 335
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 Posted: Fri May 04, 2012 10:23 pm Post subject: Ever try to make friends with other people w/ disabilities? |
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If so, was it successful or a disaster?
I tried to befriend a woman with Down Syndrome. She wanted to hang out for quite a while but then she abruptly cut off contact. I suspect I broke a social rule or maybe her parents didn't want her to see me anymore....
I had hoped that logically my best chance at making friends was to interact with people with other disabilities (including Asperger Syndrome or elsewhere on the spectrum). However, it was a miserable failure for a number of reasons, including the universal non-verbal body language code that people seem to follow, and no matter what disability a person has, if they are weirded out for whatever reason, they will act just like any NT and cut you off. (at least that has been my experience....)
Interested to hear your experiences of trying to befriend/interact with people on the spectrum or with other disabilities. Raging success or dismal failure? |
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MakaylaTheAspie
Zodai's girl
Joined: Jun 22, 2011
Age: 17
Posts: 13064
Location: Aus den USA
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| Posted: Fri May 04, 2012 10:48 pm Post subject: |
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I know a few Aspies, as well as a kid with Moderate Functioning Autism. They're all pretty good friends of mine.
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MiatheMutant
Raven
Joined: Apr 17, 2012
Age: 20
Posts: 109
Location: Hogwarts, or Vegas maybe
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| Posted: Fri May 04, 2012 10:54 pm Post subject: |
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I haven't actively searched for anyone else on the spectrum, but since I've discovered AS I've realized that most of my friends either have a couple major traits of it, or they're just odd for some other reason. Yeah, I'm usually friends with the guy who seems like he's always high but really isn't. I also know a really intelligent but slightly psychotic homeless man who lives near my university. I seem to be a magnet that other social oddballs drift toward. It keeps my life interesting, at least.
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UnLoser
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 29, 2012
Posts: 623
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| Posted: Fri May 04, 2012 11:14 pm Post subject: |
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| Making friends with Aspies is pretty darn hard, due to the lack of reciprocity on both sides. |
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CockneyRebel
Mick Avory, Sensitive brown-eyed Sweet Pea
Joined: Jul 18, 2004
Age: 38
Posts: 87361
Location: In a quiet and peaceful garden, where gentle Mick Avory-like Sweet Peas grow.
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Chummy
Phoenix
Joined: Dec 15, 2010
Posts: 731
Location: Micronesia
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| Posted: Fri May 04, 2012 11:38 pm Post subject: |
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| UnLoser wrote: | | Making friends with Aspies is pretty darn hard, due to the lack of reciprocity on both sides. |
That's not true for me TBH I befriended with some aspie dude my age and he totally misread a social situation.... long story but he took and took and took from me while when I was in trouble he left me stranded. So yeah, I guess his fault :\
It depends how severe is the disabillity. I find moderately func aspies really easy to manipulate, but TBH ,the same two dudes that I am talking about, specifically, seems unaware of themselves. Like, they are blatantly impolite and bohemian..... and it's really hard to communicate with them you know :\
But overall when I was hospitalized I found some really good friends with schizo and stuff like that... I also made enemies.... but hey can't one be perfect can he? |
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Trainbuff
Sea Gull
Joined: Feb 13, 2011
Posts: 236
Location: New York City
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| Posted: Sat May 05, 2012 12:06 am Post subject: |
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Nah, never really had the chance to.
I rarely ever see other disabled people in real life. |
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Bun
Bunnymen
Joined: Jan 09, 2012
Posts: 3250
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| Posted: Sat May 05, 2012 12:34 am Post subject: |
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| CockneyRebel wrote: | I have tried to befriend others with disabilities and the efforts have paid off.  |
Ditto. |
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DJFester
Phoenix
Joined: Dec 06, 2009
Posts: 1025
Location: Minneapolis MN USA
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| Posted: Sat May 05, 2012 12:42 am Post subject: |
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I live in an apartment building for people with disabilities. My wife and mother are both disabled and live here as well. I have had mixed results making friends with others, regardless whether they're disabled or not. However, as several others already said, making the effort to befriend them has paid off more often than not.
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jetbuilder
Phoenix
Joined: Feb 24, 2012
Age: 28
Posts: 750
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| Posted: Sat May 05, 2012 12:44 am Post subject: |
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I know several people who like me have physical disabilities. I find it easier to relate to other disabled people because we already share something in common. It's even easier because disability is an interest of mine.
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Atomsk
Bass Fiend
Joined: Apr 10, 2008
Age: 24
Posts: 1539
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| Posted: Sat May 05, 2012 2:26 am Post subject: |
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I've never purposefully gone and tried to make friends with someone with a disability. I've been friends with many disabled people, but it was all just coincidence that they were disabled.
For example, one of my exes was totally blind from birth, but her blindness has nothing to do with why I became friends with her, or why/how I met her, etc.
I've also had several friends with Autism, but I'm autistic myself, and had the diagnosis from a young age, so I had a lot of exposure to other autistic people as a kid.
I care more about someone's personality and how much I enjoy myself in their company, than anything else about them. |
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Who_Am_I
almost human
Joined: Aug 28, 2005
Age: 29
Posts: 10653
Location: My body is in Brisbane and my mind is in the gutter. :D
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| Posted: Sat May 05, 2012 4:15 am Post subject: |
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I've never tried to make friends with someone just because they had a disability.
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izzeme
Phoenix
Joined: Apr 05, 2011
Age: 26
Posts: 1112
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| Posted: Sat May 05, 2012 4:21 am Post subject: |
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| not becouse they had a disability, but, especially in high school, most of my friends had some disability or another; but that was becouse outcasts seem to cluster together. |
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edgewaters
hibernating
Joined: Aug 17, 2006
Age: 40
Posts: 2426
Location: Ontario
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| Posted: Sat May 05, 2012 5:39 am Post subject: |
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| izzeme wrote: | | not becouse they had a disability, but, especially in high school, most of my friends had some disability or another; but that was becouse outcasts seem to cluster together. |
Same experience here ... and after high school too. I knew many schizophrenics, manic-depressives (now called bipolar), etc. Asperger's didn't exist at the time but probably a few of them too. |
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bnky
Velociraptor
Joined: Nov 20, 2011
Posts: 479
Location: Kent, England
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| Posted: Sat May 05, 2012 7:03 am Post subject: |
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| Haven't actively tried to make friends with people because they hav a disability. Have had a few deaf friends,though. Seem not to notice peculiar voices etc?;-$ |
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