2wheels4ever
Just Another Weirdo From L.A.
Joined: May 04, 2012
Age: 41
Posts: 1373
Location: Losing status at the high school
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 Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 12:10 pm Post subject: Dumbing yourself down to fit in |
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| I've felt embarassed by my tendency to use detailed words and extensive knowledge on some subjects, so when I've fought the urge to say 'according to wikipedia John Lennon grew up in Liverpool and was raised mostly by his mother's eldest sister' and instead will say 'I read somewhere that John Lennon lived with his aunt'. The more troubling ones aren't coming to me at the moment but is it more of problem for me or do other feel sometimes like they're forced to learn a new language? |
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sacrip
Phoenix
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Age: 39
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 12:31 pm Post subject: |
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See, I don't consider that to be 'dumbing down' at all. You conveyed the same relevant information in a more relaxed manner. Bigger words aren't always better words, and people often think that those who use them are simply trying to show off how smart they are. I know that's usually not the case with us, but we give off that impression a lot. Don't ever feel like you have to hide your knowledge, but the less syllables you can use, the better.
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Apple_in_my_Eye
I don't remember
Joined: May 08, 2008
Age: 44
Posts: 4000
Location: in my brain
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 12:56 pm Post subject: |
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| Yup, been there, done that. In my teens I started having people say, "so, you thInk you're better/smarter than everyone else?" I somehow figured out that that was due to formal/ttextbook word usage and grammar, so I 'degraded' the way I spoke which seemed to fix the problem. Over time I've come to see it more like sacrip said, though it does still irk me a little that it's necessary. |
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Joe90
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Joined: Feb 24, 2010
Posts: 8431
Location: Great Britain
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 12:58 pm Post subject: |
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I don't need to do that - I'm actually ''dumber'' than the general population and I speak in the most basic form that even NTs have to help me on my vocabulary.
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SilkySifaka
Lemur
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Age: 27
Posts: 1396
Location: UK
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 1:23 pm Post subject: |
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| This was the story of my life at school! I did have to 'dumb down' quite a bit to make friends, but I suspect that a lot of people did at my school - being academic, bright or even enthusiastic would not win you any friends there. The real issue I had was my formal way of speaking - which I'd had from very young. Children found it laughable and adults found it creepy. I really made an effort to try speaking in a more informal, everyday sort of way. The upside of this is that I have the ability to speak 'proper' if the situation demands it and to speak in a more relaxed way if not. |
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Swordfish210
Toucan
Joined: Jun 01, 2010
Age: 22
Posts: 279
Location: Co. Dublin, Ireland
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 1:45 pm Post subject: |
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I do, but not so much as in the context of the example, but I ask questions I already know the answer of since it seems to calm NTs who do not know how to talk to me. I've gotten so far that I find it hard to talk in a different way to people now which is annoying. You think that at a university the people are used to excentricity...
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redrobin62
Doppelgänger
Joined: Apr 03, 2012
Age: 50
Posts: 4080
Location: Seattle, WA
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 1:46 pm Post subject: |
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| They called me "Brainy Smurf" in HS so that kinda speaks for itself. Till now, however, I still dumb down my language especially where I used to work which had a lot of immigrants. I'm an immigrant, too, but if you've spent a good chunk of your life acquiring a hugely decorative vocabulary, sometimes your speech dictum betrays itself. |
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AspieOtaku
Leader of the Otaku Legion
Joined: Feb 18, 2012
Age: 30
Posts: 5994
Location: Los Altos, California, United States
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 2:26 pm Post subject: |
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Dumbing myself to fit in sometimes tends to be as challenging as trying to show your work on your math problems on the paper for the professor when you can do it all in your head in a more efficient manner.  I dont like being innefficient I prefer efficiency but thats just me.
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Robdemanc
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Joined: May 31, 2010
Posts: 2321
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 2:45 pm Post subject: |
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| Yes I had to learn to do it at school. NT's prefer if you sound stupid than clever. |
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TenPencePiece
Curiosity Killed the Cone
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Age: 18
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Location: Greater Manchester, United Kingdom
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 2:54 pm Post subject: |
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Yep!
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Reynaert
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Dec 20, 2011
Age: 40
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Location: Netherlands
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 3:53 pm Post subject: |
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| sacrip wrote: | | See, I don't consider that to be 'dumbing down' at all. You conveyed the same relevant information in a more relaxed manner. Bigger words aren't always better words, and people often think that those who use them are simply trying to show off how smart they are. I know that's usually not the case with us, but we give off that impression a lot. Don't ever feel like you have to hide your knowledge, but the less syllables you can use, the better. |
Don't be silly. The first sentence conveys at least twice as much information than the second, i.e. the second sentence is 'dumbed down' by more than half. |
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CaptainTrips222
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Age: 31
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 3:59 pm Post subject: |
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| I don't exactly have that problem.... LOL |
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Evinceo
Deinonychus
Joined: Apr 14, 2012
Posts: 386
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 4:00 pm Post subject: |
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Here's a fun guide to dumbing down your intelligent conversation-it's sort of a hobby of mine.
Prepend "It's like" or "kinda like if" to any analogy, rather than "you could describe it as" or "it could be approximated by..."
No matter how fun it is to quote great authors/scientists/theologians by name, you have to stick with "someone said" or "I can't remember who said this, but..."
Even if you know something, make sure to sound less sure by mixing in "I'm pretty sure," "I think," "or at least that's what I've heard," or (my favorite, since it invites conversation) "right?"
If you're going to talk about Science, make sure you talk like Bill Nye the Science Guy. I have no idea when it became cool to hate math & science, but since it is, you basically have to restrict yourself to funny analogies.
(Now you know) |
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sacrip
Phoenix
Joined: Oct 18, 2008
Age: 39
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 4:13 pm Post subject: |
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| Reynaert wrote: | | sacrip wrote: | | See, I don't consider that to be 'dumbing down' at all. You conveyed the same relevant information in a more relaxed manner. Bigger words aren't always better words, and people often think that those who use them are simply trying to show off how smart they are. I know that's usually not the case with us, but we give off that impression a lot. Don't ever feel like you have to hide your knowledge, but the less syllables you can use, the better. |
Don't be silly. The first sentence conveys at least twice as much information than the second, i.e. the second sentence is 'dumbed down' by more than half. |
Yes, but in casual conversation, not every datum is needed. "According to Wikipedia," is unnecessary information; A true fact is a true fact, regardless of where you found it. If your audience thinks your wrong, THEN you can cite your source. "Mother's eldest sister" is a long way of saying aunt, and unless it's important to know that it was his MATERNAL aunt AND that she was the eldest of her siblings, this is easily dropped. As for the "in Liverpool" part...if your audience doesn't know the Beatles are from Liverpool, why the heck are they talking about the Beatles, anyways?
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lyricalillusions
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Age: 31
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 4:21 pm Post subject: |
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I've done that since childhood. I know I shouldn't and would like to stop, but people already view me as odd and I don't want that to get even worse.
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