|
TheHouseholdCat
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 01, 2012
Posts: 667
Location: Berlin, Germany
|
 Posted: Thu Mar 15, 2012 2:29 pm Post subject: |
 |
|
| CrazyCatLord wrote: | | Adam917 wrote: | | AstroGeek wrote: | | I will not believe that gays and lesbians have equal rights until there area few same-sex couples at every high school prom. At that point we'll have made true progress. |
I agree. I wonder if any other countries outside the USA are further ahead on this or not. |
We don't have anything like a prom in Germany. I find this tradition a bit weird, to be honest. Schools should educate students, not pressure them into dating and slow dancing or try to reinforce traditional gender roles. |
Yeah, it's a strange convention. I know my sister has winter proms and that already seems weird to me.
I'm glad German schools don't have proms. Except for the final prom, which I happily decided not to attend. My mother thought it was weird, but I didn't care much about her opinion on this, even though it comes off as arrogant and asocial if you decide not to turn up at the prom. Whatever. ^^ My life doesn't need proms.
_________________
EXPANDED CIRCLE OF FIFTHS
"It's how they see things. It's a way of bringing class to an environment, and I say that pejoratively because, obviously, good music is good music however it's created, however it's motivated." - Thomas Newman |
|
| Back to top |
|
Adam917
Raven
Joined: Feb 01, 2009
Age: 27
Posts: 100
Location: North America
|
| Posted: Thu Mar 15, 2012 10:22 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| TheHouseholdCat wrote: | Yeah, it's a strange convention. I know my sister has winter proms and that already seems weird to me.
I'm glad German schools don't have proms. Except for the final prom, which I happily decided not to attend. My mother thought it was weird, but I didn't care much about her opinion on this, even though it comes off as arrogant and asocial if you decide not to turn up at the prom. Whatever. ^^ My life doesn't need proms. |
As I been out of school for 11 years, I wonder if people still deck it out with tuxedos and renting limousines just to go to the high school proms in this economy. I'd hope that kind of wasteful spending on a single night that's highly restricted considering the money being spent aand how nice it's usually viewed by attendees. I'm glad my prom was very low-key as the entire school had only about 50 students. I. Wouldn't have been able to handle a traditional prom. I didn't even have a date. |
|
| Back to top |
|
Magdalena
Sea Gull
Joined: Feb 07, 2012
Posts: 205
Location: United States
|
| Posted: Wed Mar 21, 2012 11:19 pm Post subject: |
|
|
I went to my school's prom when I was in school. And speaking from personal experience, all I have to say to those in Germany is that you are not missing anything! I thought school dances were sometimes entertaining (usually only when the DJ was good), but not always. And dances generally only required casual dress.
Unlike dances, proms are generally very expensive to go to. There's the admission price, then there's all the decorative crap you have to buy, such as a suit or prom dress, a corsage and often a hair-styling. Then you have to worry about transportation because the prom is usually not held at the school itself- mine was a 40-minute drive in each direction!!!
And the best part? You're at the same event with a bunch of other people who regularly bully or sneer at you every school day. After all, it's their school too. It creates quite the uneasy social atmosphere, and distracts from your ability to enjoy the event in general.
So a prom is, to sum up: expensive, a lot of effort, tense, and awkward, even if you're with friends.
Me and two or three friends went together and we found that we could've had just as much fun throwing a less-expensive party (or gone somewhere/done something memorable like a two-day vacation) without the proximity of bullies, etc. that was twice the fun, less stressful, and more memorable.
Proms are generally only meaningful if you're traditional, one of the "popular" kids, or in the same clique as one of the "popular" kids.
_________________
Male-bodied pansexual and panromantic.
Your Aspie score: 130 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 90 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie
EQ Score: 37/100 ("low empathy") |
|
| Back to top |
|
Dreamslost
Blue Jay
Joined: Mar 08, 2012
Age: 60
Posts: 89
Location: Westminster, CO
|
| Posted: Thu Mar 22, 2012 5:06 am Post subject: |
|
|
If you connect on a 'spirit' level, package is irrelevant be same sex or opposite sex. What i would love to be able to do is recognise the signals of someone interested in me or that they were not interested in my forwardness because i really cant tell if someone is gay or lesbian though some conversations may suggest, i miss all of that so i make a good cigar store indian, stonefaced. Because i think i am so odd, i likelwise feel i dont fit anyplace so far.
_________________
The Truth is out there, it just may not be what you want or expect |
|
| Back to top |
|
EXPECIALLY
Phoenix
Joined: Oct 21, 2011
Age: 29
Posts: 700
|
| Posted: Thu Mar 22, 2012 10:48 am Post subject: |
|
|
| Dreamslost wrote: | | If you connect on a 'spirit' level, package is irrelevant be same sex or opposite sex. What i would love to be able to do is recognise the signals of someone interested in me or that they were not interested in my forwardness because i really cant tell if someone is gay or lesbian though some conversations may suggest, i miss all of that so i make a good cigar store indian, stonefaced. Because i think i am so odd, i likelwise feel i dont fit anyplace so far. |
I also have bad gaydar FWIW.
But I've done that whole spirit thing, have dated men that I REALLY connected to in the past and seeing their naked bodies killed my lady wood every time 
_________________
AD/HD BAP.
HDTV...
Whatever. |
|
| Back to top |
|
emtatiana
Emu Egg
Joined: Feb 12, 2012
Posts: 5
|
| Posted: Thu Mar 22, 2012 10:00 pm Post subject: Gender and sexuality are both social constructs |
|
|
Hi - I am 'lesbian', in that I am a biological female who is attracted to biological females. However - I don't understand or do 'girly' things like makeup and high heels. I am attracted to intelligence and a someone who can stand up to me! Men can fill these two requirements but I have no understanding of sports and a dislike of male anatomy (no offensive meant guys).
I used to be only comfortable in the LGBT world but now live in a small town which is very 'straight' and our social life involves straight people only. I have learnt that people can be nice and accepting no matter what their gender and sexuality. |
|
| Back to top |
|
TheHouseholdCat
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 01, 2012
Posts: 667
Location: Berlin, Germany
|
| Posted: Fri Mar 23, 2012 7:06 am Post subject: Re: Gender and sexuality are both social constructs |
|
|
| emtatiana wrote: | Hi - I am 'lesbian', in that I am a biological female who is attracted to biological females. However - I don't understand or do 'girly' things like makeup and high heels. I am attracted to intelligence and a someone who can stand up to me! Men can fill these two requirements but I have no understanding of sports and a dislike of male anatomy (no offensive meant guys).
I used to be only comfortable in the LGBT world but now live in a small town which is very 'straight' and our social life involves straight people only. I have learnt that people can be nice and accepting no matter what their gender and sexuality. |
This is the ideal situation. Nice and accepting people is what this world really needs. Especially in small towns.
_________________
EXPANDED CIRCLE OF FIFTHS
"It's how they see things. It's a way of bringing class to an environment, and I say that pejoratively because, obviously, good music is good music however it's created, however it's motivated." - Thomas Newman |
|
| Back to top |
|
Reptillian
Snowy Owl
Joined: Oct 25, 2010
Posts: 168
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2012 7:40 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| Sexual orientation does not always has to do with actions or even feelings. So yes, technically a homosexual person may enjoy sex with the opposite sex although he/she is not sexually attracted to him/her. You can go take a look at AVEN and see there are asexuals who enjoy sex, but he/she is not attracted to that individual sexually. There's even people who watch porn that goes against their sexual orientation. I'd just like to say this. There's even gay men who's married to a woman and admires her though probably she might be the exception to the rule. Sometimes, people tend to be ignorant of what sexual orientation is actually is. |
|
| Back to top |
|
Joker
Sinn Fein
Joined: Mar 20, 2011
Age: 24
Posts: 7593
Location: North Carolina The Tar Heel State :)
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2012 10:16 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| I do let the fact that I am bigender define my personality its just the way I am. |
|
| Back to top |
|
whiteflower
Butterfly
Joined: Mar 29, 2012
Posts: 10
|
| Posted: Wed May 16, 2012 6:54 pm Post subject: People Who Let Their Sexuality Define Their Personality |
|
|
| I would agree with some of the posts about how some gay people let their sexuality define their personality. Even though sexuality's a big deal and a big part of who we are as people, I do think that too many gay people and even straight people emphasize their sexualities too much. I don't like how some gay people are like ''I'm gay and this is who I am'', I'm thinking to myself, ''Well what about the other stuff?'' As a woman, I feel like many NTs define me by my sexuality and whether I'm seeing someone or not. Women frequently ask me as a way to socialize if I have a boyfriend, and I'd rather keep that private. I'm open about my own bisexuality, because it's important and I want to advocate for other bi people but there are times where I'm like ''you know there's more to life than sexuality'' and I'm glad other people on this board feel the same way. |
|
| Back to top |
|
SanityTheorist
Wandering Artist
Joined: Feb 14, 2012
Posts: 2095
Location: The Akuma Afterglow
|
| Posted: Wed Aug 01, 2012 12:49 am Post subject: |
|
|
It is woth noting I completely defy stereotypes, including the hyper-masculine one. I just act like myself always, but most gay men seem to want those that fit into a "less threatening" appearance. Good way to get acceptance by society, but it is still an act of self-repression.
_________________
My music at: http://www.youtube.com/user/SanityTheorist5/videos
Currently working on getting in a studio to record my solo album 40+ tracks written.
Chatroom nicks: MetalFluttershy/MetalTwilight/SanityTheorist |
|
| Back to top |
|
Flamencita
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Jul 31, 2012
Age: 20
Posts: 37
|
| Posted: Wed Aug 01, 2012 6:56 am Post subject: |
|
|
I live in Australia in a small city (would be tiny by all your standards!) and I went to a gay bar for the first time the other day (we only have one). Almost all of my friends are straight or a little bit bi and I go to "normal" bars usually.
I agree that sexuality shouldn't be a big thing and when I talk to people I talk about same sex relationships and if someone asks me if I have a boyfriend I tell them know and let them know that I am far more likely to have a girlfriend, not to be a smart ass but just so their mind is opened to it and it becomes normal as it is.
As I have already said it really is normal, but at the same time it feels a little special, I feel lucky that I like girls actually!
And "normal" bars do have a little bit of a not so gay friendly vibe, guys tend to crack onto me a lot which I don't like and when I make out with a girl people stare and guys get really excited and want to take photos and have threesomes. I think this is for a few reasons - the majority of the people there are heterosexual or not openly bi or gay and secondly a lot of girls make out with other girls when drunk to turn on guys and just try it so sometimes people presume that if you are kissing a girl because you want to, you are actually doing it to turn on others.
If you are at a gay bar you usually don't have guys cracking onto you or wanting threesomes and if you make out with a girl everyone thinks it's normal and is happy for you. Also there is just a general vibe of acceptance and everyone being themselves and feeling good about it. And also it is about community, just as we are all on here talking to each other about something we have in common, it is nice to talk to people who also have similar sexuality as you.  |
|
| Back to top |
|
SanityTheorist
Wandering Artist
Joined: Feb 14, 2012
Posts: 2095
Location: The Akuma Afterglow
|
| Posted: Wed Aug 01, 2012 9:19 am Post subject: |
|
|
Flamencita, guys in straight bars I 've heard are pigs and gay bars the guys are as prissy as the women that go there from what I've heard...shame there isn't a better way for the non-stereotypical to find a boyfriend/girlfriend.
_________________
My music at: http://www.youtube.com/user/SanityTheorist5/videos
Currently working on getting in a studio to record my solo album 40+ tracks written.
Chatroom nicks: MetalFluttershy/MetalTwilight/SanityTheorist |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
|
|
