Cad
Deinonychus
Joined: May 18, 2009
Posts: 367
Location: Away from the acids and alkaline hydroxides
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 Posted: Tue Jun 26, 2012 11:31 pm Post subject: Annoying housemate again |
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Hi everyone, just me ranting about my annoying housemate again.
In case you haven't read my previous posts on the subject, I'm living with 2 guys, M and S, both are friends but M is extremely annoying and S is pretty laid back and a nice guy. Basically, M keeps stealing our food.
S and I regularly share food. This is because we both ask to eat each other's food and don't eat it all (if we do we replace or repay), both offer each other food, both our parents send food down so we share it with each other and our other friends, and both help with the dishes. S gives me lifts in his car places so I don't mind letting him eat my stuff, and he helps with the cleaning and owns a lot of the things in the house. M shares our food also, but he doesn't ask, he doesn't replace it (except bread and milk which are communal), he eats way more than me and S, and refers to our food as 'communal.' The food he buys he either eats straight away, or is stuff I don't eat or don't cook with (snacks and chips etc. Very rarely buys meat/veg). I wouldn't care if he ate it as long as it was replaced, or he asked. Here are some examples:
My mum baked me a large batch of biscuits and sent them down. I offered everyone some, 80% were eaten by M in half an hour. This always happens to S who's parents always send stuff down, but he's never brave enough to say anything, he just rants when M is not around. Any snacks are left in the pantry M just eats them within a few days.
S regularly buys slabs of pepsi for him and his friends when they come over (I don't drink it). Most are drank by M (drinks about 2 a day), and S gets so mad about it but never does anything.
M was whinging about having to buy breakfast cereal because it's so expensive. I said 'just eat porridge, that's what I do cause it's cheap.' He took that to mean he could eat 'the' porridge (mine...) in the pantry and not replace it.
M has never paid for the internet so S and I have to cover the cost.
I wouldn't care if he asked, replaced, repayed, bought stuff that we could share or did stuff around the house without having to be nagged by S and I 50 times. He comes from a really rich family, this is not a problem, but it means he has never had to work for anything in his life so he expects S and I to do everything for him. He doesn't work and S and I work/study 8 hours a day so it's not like he hasn't got time. S never says anything to anyone's face because he doesn't like fighting with people but it's annoying that he doesn't help me when I tell M to do stuff (e.g. we have a cleaning roster).
This is just a rant. Feel free to tell me I'm overreacting. |
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2wheels4ever
Just Another Weirdo From L.A.
Joined: May 04, 2012
Age: 41
Posts: 1339
Location: Losing status at the high school
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| Posted: Wed Jun 27, 2012 1:17 am Post subject: |
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Take a play right out of takers' own playbook; have yourself and S buy smaller portions of the foods you both eat and store them in your personal quarters. Don't be the first one to replace things unless you were the last person to use them. Keep more of the foods M is less likely to eat. When you receive a care package, offer a polite portion to the others and put the remainder out of their sight. Throttle his IP address. Work out a way so his undone chores affect him more than it does you. He hasn't changed his behavior because he hasn't had a reason to. When he finds the pantry empty his status quo will have been interrupted. M sounds like a smart guy, I'm sure he'll think of something...
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"You're probably wondering why I'm here, and so am I, so am I" (not that it makes a heck of a lot of a difference anyway) |
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questor
Hermit
Joined: Apr 24, 2011
Posts: 1983
Location: Twilight Zone
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| Posted: Wed Jun 27, 2012 2:20 am Post subject: Moocher |
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I agree with 2wheels4ever. You and S need to keep your foods in your personal quarters. Besides shelf foods, each of you needs to get a cube fridge for the cold foods, too, that you can keep in your rooms. And don't forget to lock your rooms when not there to keep this moocher from stealing the food from your rooms. Also, you and S really, really need to sit down with M to lay down the law. Basically, tell him that he is not pulling his weight, and that this is not acceptable. You really need to make it clear to him that from now on he pays his share of the I-net or he doesn't get to use it. And you need to tell him that if he wants to eat your chow, he has to chip in on the cost, or replace what he has eaten. And you need to tell him that he MUST do his share of the chores, as it isn't fair to the two of you--who are working--to have to do all of his chores along with your own. And, you need to tell him that from now on, he is not to scarf down the lion's share of any foods/treats--that if treats are offered for sharing, he is not to take more than 2. You need to make it clear to him that his behavior so far has been that of a mooching pig, and it has to stop. You also need to tell him, that if he doesn't stop, then when the rent is up for renewal he will have to leave--with a vote of 2 against one, he loses, unless he mends his ways.
Look, if you don't call him on his rotten behavior, he won't stop, and you will have to keep putting up with it.
I hope you are able to resolve this issue. |
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Cad
Deinonychus
Joined: May 18, 2009
Posts: 367
Location: Away from the acids and alkaline hydroxides
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| Posted: Wed Jun 27, 2012 7:42 am Post subject: |
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| Thanks for the replies guys. S is very smart but also very benevolent and kind, he likes other people to be happy and often neglects his own needs. I've taken on your suggestions and hidden my food in my office and in my room (where M is not allowed to go), but S doesn't do this even though I tell him all the time. I also at the start of the year started using heaps and heaps of chilli and cooking asian food which M doesn't really eat and that half solved the problem, so maybe I just have to buy more weird stuff that he won't eat. All our friends say we have to kick M out and we want to some times, but he started the lease/rent, all the power etc is in his name, and he basically invited us in so it would be horrible to kick him out. I'll pull S aside and see if he can back me up in having a chat to M. Thanks again. |
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mike_br
Sea Gull
Joined: Apr 23, 2012
Posts: 202
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| Posted: Wed Jun 27, 2012 7:58 pm Post subject: |
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| Cad wrote: | | Thanks for the replies guys. S is very smart but also very benevolent and kind, he likes other people to be happy and often neglects his own needs. I've taken on your suggestions and hidden my food in my office and in my room (where M is not allowed to go), but S doesn't do this even though I tell him all the time. I also at the start of the year started using heaps and heaps of chilli and cooking asian food which M doesn't really eat and that half solved the problem, so maybe I just have to buy more weird stuff that he won't eat. All our friends say we have to kick M out and we want to some times, but he started the lease/rent, all the power etc is in his name, and he basically invited us in so it would be horrible to kick him out. I'll pull S aside and see if he can back me up in having a chat to M. Thanks again. |
Good decision. Don't kick the guy out without giving him a chance to change his behaviors to an acceptable range.
He may just be dense.
IF it doesn't work, then you draw the guns 
Good luck. |
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Scottinoz
Sea Gull
Joined: Jun 26, 2012
Age: 29
Posts: 249
Location: Australia
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| Posted: Fri Jun 29, 2012 7:38 am Post subject: Re: Annoying housemate again |
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| Cad wrote: | Hi everyone, just me ranting about my annoying housemate again.
In case you haven't read my previous posts on the subject, I'm living with 2 guys, M and S, both are friends but M is extremely annoying and S is pretty laid back and a nice guy. Basically, M keeps stealing our food.
S and I regularly share food. This is because we both ask to eat each other's food and don't eat it all (if we do we replace or repay), both offer each other food, both our parents send food down so we share it with each other and our other friends, and both help with the dishes. S gives me lifts in his car places so I don't mind letting him eat my stuff, and he helps with the cleaning and owns a lot of the things in the house. M shares our food also, but he doesn't ask, he doesn't replace it (except bread and milk which are communal), he eats way more than me and S, and refers to our food as 'communal.' The food he buys he either eats straight away, or is stuff I don't eat or don't cook with (snacks and chips etc. Very rarely buys meat/veg). I wouldn't care if he ate it as long as it was replaced, or he asked. Here are some examples:
My mum baked me a large batch of biscuits and sent them down. I offered everyone some, 80% were eaten by M in half an hour. This always happens to S who's parents always send stuff down, but he's never brave enough to say anything, he just rants when M is not around. Any snacks are left in the pantry M just eats them within a few days.
S regularly buys slabs of pepsi for him and his friends when they come over (I don't drink it). Most are drank by M (drinks about 2 a day), and S gets so mad about it but never does anything.
M was whinging about having to buy breakfast cereal because it's so expensive. I said 'just eat porridge, that's what I do cause it's cheap.' He took that to mean he could eat 'the' porridge (mine...) in the pantry and not replace it.
M has never paid for the internet so S and I have to cover the cost.
I wouldn't care if he asked, replaced, repayed, bought stuff that we could share or did stuff around the house without having to be nagged by S and I 50 times. He comes from a really rich family, this is not a problem, but it means he has never had to work for anything in his life so he expects S and I to do everything for him. He doesn't work and S and I work/study 8 hours a day so it's not like he hasn't got time. S never says anything to anyone's face because he doesn't like fighting with people but it's annoying that he doesn't help me when I tell M to do stuff (e.g. we have a cleaning roster).
This is just a rant. Feel free to tell me I'm overreacting. |
I say kick m out for been a stingy,using assho!e, I would dislike someone like that in my space >_> I said that a politely as i can. |
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Cad
Deinonychus
Joined: May 18, 2009
Posts: 367
Location: Away from the acids and alkaline hydroxides
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| Posted: Sat Jun 30, 2012 12:34 am Post subject: Re: Annoying housemate again |
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| Scottinoz wrote: |
I say kick m out for been a stingy,using assho!e, I would dislike someone like that in my space >_> I said that a politely as i can. |
It took me months to get used to it... it takes me ages to get used to anyone in my space. |
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