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Kairi96
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16 Dec 2012, 1:20 pm

I often see people saying, on this forum and in real life too, that they talk too little. I know that this is an autistic trait, but it's not my case, at all. Most of the times, I talk too much, unless I have a shutdown (that can last even for a whole day, but usually for a few hours), or I am with people I don't want to talk to. But usually I talk a lot, even too much, usually about my interests, and people have often said me that I never stop, and I can go on talking even for minutes and minutes. Usually when I'm at home, for example while dining, I'll go on and on talking about something, unless my parents stop me. And when I'm not at home, even my classmates must sometimes stop me, and some of them also said I should talk less. I even talk during lessons, and sometimes I interrupt professors while they're talking. Can anybody else relate?


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Lucywlf
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16 Dec 2012, 1:40 pm

I have that same problem. The only way to moderate my talking, a lot of the time, is to stop talking completely.



Conspicuous
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16 Dec 2012, 2:04 pm

My constant problem is that I can never get myself to shut up when talking to people. Add to that my poorly self-taught sense of humor, and you have a recipe for a very annoying person.

Oddly, on the internet, I very rarely talk at all.


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Entek
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16 Dec 2012, 2:22 pm

I talk too much to ppl i know. That includes a person ive met for the second time. Its like a switch triggers, and that by simply meeting me a second time, its a trigger to open the floodgates and tell them EVERYTHING.

Sadly the same applies in every email, txt msg, or pm i reply to. The floodgates open and out it all comes.

Really wish i could say sorry and take back all the words that ive swamped ppl with over the years, as i wonder if i would have more friends by keeping my mouth shut :)



LeeTimmer
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16 Dec 2012, 4:20 pm

I tend to talk way too much with people I know. With strangers, however, I'll barely acknowledge their existence. It's not so much that I'm being rude; I just don't know what to say or where to start. My family and I go to my brother-in-law's house for holidays, for example. If it's just him and his wife and son, I'm fine. When others start showing up, however, I'll go to the back yard and play with the dog. They thought it was weird at first, but they seem to accept it now - or at least tolerate it.


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Joe90
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16 Dec 2012, 4:37 pm

I talk very little, but always at the wrong time. I say this because I usually get someone saying ''ssshhhh, I'm trying to listen to radio/TV/other background noise''.


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bleh12345
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20 Jan 2014, 8:21 pm

I know it's been a few months since a reply has happened, but it's not a complete zombie thread, so...


I do the exact same things people describe here. It hurts so much emotionally. I KNOW I'm annoying. I KNOW I keep going on and on and on. I just...can't stop. It just all comes out. If someone tells me nicely, I feel SO much better because I can try very hard to stop. However, people often say "shut up" or get SUPER pissed. They have no idea how depressing it is to be pretty much worthless socially...



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20 Jan 2014, 8:29 pm

Too much or too little. Either way, I get yelled at.


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skibum
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20 Jan 2014, 8:49 pm

I have been told that I do both, talk too much and talk to little. I think it depends on the subject matter. I can talk your ear off about ski stuff and not even realize that you are not keeping up of that you don't really care. Other subjects, you can barely get two words out of me and I can get exhausted just listening to them. :D Some subjects can even cause me to shutdown and on rarer occasion even melt down.


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wozeree
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20 Jan 2014, 9:15 pm

Edit - oops error post! Sorry!



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20 Jan 2014, 9:19 pm

DragonFireWalker wrote:
I was diagnosed as a HFA woman about four years ago. Sadly I talk way too much and don't know how to stop at times (especially about things I am very passionate about or know well... I am constantly called a know it all too). It gets to the point that people around me, especially family, get pissed off at me and tell me to shut the hell up etc. I also have a problem with interupting people, talking during TV/movies and I also get overly defensive when it seems people are constantly yelling or snapping at me. These problems are depressing me so much at times...I want help but I dont know how to work with these problems. I don't want to make people mad at me or fight...I just want to be happy and find peace.

Can anyone please help me...Im so desperate, I know Im pushing people away from me. Im so very sad...and feel like a failure every time I try not to do these things. Please help. (u can PM me if you like...I really could use someone understanding to talk to right now.) Im begining to hate who I am at times....
Maybe you can write instead. Then you can all your thoughts out whenever you want without them having to hear them. Perhaps carrying a notebook around or typing in an Ipad or on the notes app of your phone.


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vickygleitz
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20 Jan 2014, 10:20 pm

I talk too much or too little. What's really bad is when I am babbling away, then become aware that I have become annoying, but continue on in a futile attempt to finnesse whoever I am speaking to, despite the fact that a part of me is shouting STFU to myself as I go on and on and on and on....



aspergermarried
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21 Jan 2014, 3:25 am

I used to get in trouble all the time for talking in class (interrupting the teacher with facts). I'm excited by facts and subject and just didn't get it that other people have the right to get excited over things that I think are stupid.

I talk a lot less out in public now though, due to much humiliation and criticism brought on by my social misdeeds in the world. The truth is, wise people put up with other peoples' faults and learning curves. Other people don't. Those verbally judgmental and impatient people hurt my feelings. I don't like that. But I've also tested wise people by talking too much. They passed by still being my friend and still being kind to me. They will do that for NTs that say stupid things for short durations of time, too. If nothing else, talking less will give us a chance to figure out our social world more, by listening to what other people talk about and feel, even when we don't really enjoy listening.

It is true that happiness is something that I almost always have unless I'm interrupted by something that I'm not able to understand (like criticism). I like thinking about my own stuff and I do (honestly) enjoy interrupting other peoples' conversation with more educational topics. Knowing that habit about myself means that I have a responsibility now to change how I react in conversation. I still fail constantly (especially when I'm mad at my spouse) but mostly when I think somebody is saying something that is blatantly wrong. I'm trying to react less to this negatively stimulating even in life, too. As I age, I care less when I notice my verbal faux pas and go on with my day easier than when I was young.



Makar
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21 Jan 2014, 5:58 am

bleh12345 wrote:
It hurts so much emotionally. I KNOW I'm annoying. I KNOW I keep going on and on and on. I just...can't stop. It just all comes out. If someone tells me nicely, I feel SO much better because I can try very hard to stop. However, people often say "shut up" or get SUPER pissed.


This. ^

It's all or none with me :/ I hate it, I need to find a middle ground so I can stop regretting it everytime I open my mouth.



GivePeaceAChance
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21 Jan 2014, 7:02 am

BeggingTurtle wrote:
Too much or too little. Either way, I get yelled at.


yes this exactly - either way we are in trouble, NT people want us to be social and when I do make the attempt I say the wrong thing or very often I end up spilling my guts to the first person who seems to have a sympathetic ear. Then they run like a wounded rabbit or act like I am a freak.


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micfranklin
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21 Jan 2014, 10:47 am

Video games, movies, TV, football and animals are pretty much the only topics that will get me to talk excessively. Any other time I'm almost guaranteed to be near silent.