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kingjim
Blue Jay
Joined: Jan 30, 2007
Posts: 82
Location: Some Places
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 Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2007 6:05 am Post subject: |
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Wow, you are completely osessed with hygene! Have you been diagnosed OCD?? I bath enough.. every day or two or four.. I dress for me. I have girls lined up.. I couldn't care less. Why date if you're not looking to reproduce? I don't get this thread at all. Why all the effort? Does it matter if people think you stink? Maybe it's the best way to weed out all the shallow jerks right off the top. Just a thought... Plus, your boy dresses in t's and shorts and whatnot right? So, if I wanted a girl like you.. I would just be me, right? Or should I work my butt off for someone I will grow to detest?  |
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invivo
Sea Gull
Joined: Mar 31, 2007
Posts: 204
Location: Berlin, Germany
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| Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2007 9:41 am Post subject: |
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this is, well outside of my life, I wear what I like, and only for me, I dont care what others think, and thank the Universe, I dont date anything  |
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Shale
Phoenix
Joined: Jan 15, 2007
Posts: 535
Location: New Zealand
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| Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2007 9:40 pm Post subject: |
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Lol. It comes down to implied effort, if you want to get down and dirty with the meanings and such.
Sure, you can be you and not give a damn what other people think. You could also end up with a woman who doesn't give a damn about what you think of her. Doubtful she'll do your dishes or cook you food or do the grocery shopping or give you a massage when your neck is sore either, or mollycoddle you a little when you're sick, etc...because she doesn't give a damn about what other people think and doesn't intend to make any effort 
It's not about being obsessed with hygeine. It's saying, this is what most people will do and this is what the culture around cleanliness etc entails, take from it what you wish.
And if someone has a go at you, the reasonings behind why may exist in this thread.
Don't knock it before you try it   |
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GoatOnFire
Greatest Of All Time
Joined: Feb 23, 2007
Posts: 3358
Location: Texas
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| Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2007 10:29 pm Post subject: |
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Reading this actually made me feel better about myself. I guess I naturally have decent fashion sense because I do most of these things. I despise sweatpants, I just find them uncomfortable, jeans are my normal fare. I shower everyday and wear deodorant and am generally fastidious about hygiene. My main weakness is in the shoe department, I'd need a professional to help me with that though.
One of my issues is with the hair gel. I don't think that applies in Texas the same way in does in NZ. I have heard many disparaging comments made about, pardon my French their words not mine, "spiky-haired fags." (I've even heard gay guys make that comment with those exact words strangely enough)
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Oh say, can you see? Everyone is dumb but me. I'm never ever wrong, and that's all you'll ever be. |
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Shale
Phoenix
Joined: Jan 15, 2007
Posts: 535
Location: New Zealand
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| Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2007 11:00 pm Post subject: |
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LOL. That'd be a bit of culture coming in there That'd be why this article is to be taken with a grain of salt or two...doesn't apply everywhere. While people prefer to style their hair here with gel etc as with many places worldwide (mullets and long hair seem to automatically be labelled 'Bogan' here XD), elsewhere it ain't so hot. So if you know for a fact that a certain style is going to get you hit with a whacky stick...don't do it. Better to take note of what the sheep are doing (without necessarily following them religiously) rather than ignore them completely, after all.
Sounds like you've got a natural knack for the whole thing man, I'm really impressed (and not because of conformity or anything, so there better not be any finger-pointers in the audience...because you do what's considered taking care of yourself ) |
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ahayes
Banned
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Joined: Dec 03, 2006
Posts: 9746
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| Posted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 4:31 am Post subject: |
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| I always wear different jeans, t-shirts, and industrial work boots. If I don't have to go outside (I live in a dorm) I wear socks and sandals. |
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sepia
Deinonychus
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Joined: Jul 29, 2004
Age: 32
Posts: 327
Location: N.London
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| Posted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 3:20 pm Post subject: aspie chic |
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hey shale,
not sure about the whole tone (or tome perhaps) of this thread. i have a lot of trouble getting dressed and groomed for various reasons mainly to do with sensory integration and sometimes to forward planning:
1). i cannot stand to be in shops for very long especially if busy. i have to plan my route vigorously and if i push my luck by staying more than a couple of hours at this, i can feel sick for days rather than the customary few hours afterwards.
2). i am usually too cold and most womens clothes do not wrap and give comfort without restricting and swaddling my body (both lead back to getting too cold) and leads to grouchiness.
3). the smell of most perfumes (except a few mild natural ones) give me a very specific headache.
i'd rather be a bit grubby, a bit tatty and comfortable. i appreciate it when people dress in a unique manner. |
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Shale
Phoenix
Joined: Jan 15, 2007
Posts: 535
Location: New Zealand
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| Posted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 8:01 pm Post subject: |
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Well if you're a gal then you've actually got a lot of options available in regards to originality for starters. We have the option of hand-made or home-made clothing to a much greater degree than the boys, and we've got a lot more we can actually put on stylistically (and the option of creating our own styles and not have people pull faces...for some guys, going OTT with style can get them labelled Metrosexual, and that's not a good thing if they don't WANT to be metro XD)...
I do sympathise with the comfort thing though. I may be your average NT in many ways but I absolutely DESPISE things being around my neck. Even just a little bit. Feels like I'm being strangled! I also hate things going over my hands - which is tough, I live in a cold country and I'm exceptionally short...so everything with long sleeves has VERY long sleeves on me. All that being said, I'm actually wearing a scarf right now and teaching myself to resist the urge to stuff my hands down my neck every 5 seconds. Doing terribly, I might add. Every half-sentence I'm typing here...I'm interrupting myself to fiddle with the damn thing. Wretched cold weather.
It does look very nice though. LOL. I'm going to put up with it as long as I can, and if I can't adjust, then screw it.
Despite appearances here, I actually hate clothes shopping. I used to get dragged around for 12 hours by my mum and sisters while they squee'd from one shop to the next. Me, as a slight tomboy...it was hell. Still lasts to this day and age...one hour of shopping is more than enough for me. Again...I sympathise with you Sepia, as well as many others that've posted in this thread. Normally I know where I will shop (Farmers for tops and underwear, Pagani for pants, and if time, hold my nose and hope for the best by diving into the throngs of teenage girls in Glassons and see if there's anything worthwhile in there), know how many items I'd like to get, what sort of items I'm looking for, and what sort of budget I'm looking at. Never quite goes exactly to plan, but it DOES mean that I suffer the noise and chaos for less IMO the best sort of clothes shopping, especially if you hate shops, is to think of getting one item at a time. Last trip I only scored a pair of boots...all I wanted. Before that it was a couple of shirts and a scarf...yep, THAT scarf. *proceeds to unstrangle self again*
As far as smells go, it's definitely better to be simply clean-ish and fresh-ish than smelling good and be ready to pass out, hurl or stab people in the face  Then again, a lot of us gals can get away with, again, more than the boys can in terms of smell. Our BO tends to be not nearly as strong as that of the guys around. I usually just wear deodorant...perfume if I have someone to impress
*has hands down neck once again*
You know...this is an interesting experiment for having a very brief peek into what I'd imagine an Aspie's sensory world to be like I freakin' hate this scarf, I CANNOT ignore it...if I shift it from the front of my neck by my throat (which is what gets the the most, makes me feel like I'm being choked with the slightest pressure) then I can feel the constant weight and pressure of it against my chest as I've tied it in a loop (fold in half, stuff both ends through the bend in the middle, pull to top of neck...very warm). After a while it starts to feel like a lead weight and very irritating, I get to the point where I have to scratch at my chest to kill the sensation. Thing is...I need to keep it on since I had a crook neck the day before from the cold, and would rather be able to turn my head without excruciating pain
So tell me. Is this just me being a dork, or is this along the lines of the sensory issues that Aspies have to deal with? |
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calandale
Stellar's Jay
Joined: Mar 10, 2007
Posts: 15131
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| Posted: Tue Apr 03, 2007 12:09 am Post subject: |
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My style has always been so far from any norm that labels just couldn't suffice. I did have to avoid some stuff when Goth styles were prevalent though - not the all black, but the romantic variety. Feels safe once more.
Actually, I've found that women tend to have a more bitter smell than men do. Not that I dislike it, but just an observation. |
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Cernunnos
Phoenix
Joined: Jan 16, 2007
Posts: 869
Location: Nottingham Castle
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| Posted: Tue Apr 03, 2007 7:36 am Post subject: |
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I used to worry about "fitting in" with clothes and stuff. I've reached a happy & neutral medium where what I wear isn't odd or outrageous, but doesn't necessarily run with the current trends. What a waste of my time and energy it was worrying about what after all is a piece of material.
Personally I think people are manipulated by big business into buying clothes that are "trendy". Why are they trendy? Because the Fashion Industry says so, and they say so because they are ripping people off to make more money.
If your partner or prospective partner is so shallow that they can't see beyond you fitting into the current trends then are they really worth dating anyway?
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Any fool can cope with a crisis. The art is in dealing with the crap you get everyday. |
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sepia
Deinonychus
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Joined: Jul 29, 2004
Age: 32
Posts: 327
Location: N.London
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| Posted: Tue Apr 03, 2007 6:06 pm Post subject: |
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| Shale wrote: | | Well if you're a gal then you've actually got a lot of options available in regards to originality for starters. We have the option of hand-made or home-made clothing to a much greater degree than the boys |
i agree that this is one area that we get a better deal than guys. i would love to be able to make my own clothes, i even tried it at school, but being a bit dispractic i think it would take me a looooong time being able to even sew in a straight line. happily i can fix stuff and make (very) rudimentary alterations.
| Shale wrote: | | do sympathise with the comfort thing though. I may be your average NT in many ways but I absolutely DESPISE things being around my neck. Even just a little bit. Feels like I'm being strangled! I also hate things going over my hands - which is tough, I live in a cold country and I'm exceptionally short...so everything with long sleeves has VERY long sleeves on me. All that being said, I'm actually wearing a scarf right now and teaching myself to resist the urge to stuff my hands down my neck every 5 seconds. Doing terribly, I might add. Every half-sentence I'm typing here...I'm interrupting myself to fiddle with the damn thing. Wretched cold weather. |
That sounds familiar.
| Shale wrote: | | ... and if time, hold my nose and hope for the best by diving into the throngs of teenage girls in Glassons and see if there's anything worthwhile in there |
 , i read that as 'diving into the thongs' (which is a g-string knickers here in the UK).
| Shale wrote: | You know...this is an interesting experiment for having a very brief peek into what I'd imagine an Aspie's sensory world to be like I freakin' hate this scarf, I CANNOT ignore it...if I shift it from the front of my neck by my throat (which is what gets the the most, makes me feel like I'm being choked with the slightest pressure) then I can feel the constant weight and pressure of it against my chest as I've tied it in a loop (fold in half, stuff both ends through the bend in the middle, pull to top of neck...very warm). After a while it starts to feel like a lead weight and very irritating, I get to the point where I have to scratch at my chest to kill the sensation. Thing is...I need to keep it on since I had a crook neck the day before from the cold, and would rather be able to turn my head without excruciating pain
So tell me. Is this just me being a dork, or is this along the lines of the sensory issues that Aspies have to deal with? |
i think that you are not far off. |
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JonnyBGoode
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 30, 2007
Posts: 1327
Location: Long Beach, CA
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| Posted: Tue Apr 03, 2007 6:22 pm Post subject: |
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I prefer suit and tie, or slacks and sportcoat. Prefer standard collars, I hate futzing around with the buttons on button-downs. (Also makes it insanely difficult to loosen/take off a tie.) I've never felt comfortable in t-shirts and shorts... but maybe that's because I've never felt comfortable with my arms and legs. Occasionally I'll throw in braces, and perhaps go all the way and wear a tux. Often (almost always, these days) wear a fedora. Partly because they're cool (my fedora gets more action than I do... sometimes I just send it out to the clubs and I stay home), and partly to hide my thinning hairline.
I guess I figure, if I'm gonna dress oddly, I might as well do it well...
I also like long coats. When I was younger, I used to wear a coat 24/7 (an aspie thing, I think...). Coats with lots of pockets... but then I lose things in the pockets and end up doing a Tom Baker impression going through them trying to find stuff. Sometimes will wear the coat just on my shoulders over whatever else I'm wearing... which has caused some less-observant people to accuse me of wearing capes. (I may have an affected clothing style, but not that affected...  )
oh... and LMAO @ "diving into the thongs of teenage girls" |
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calandale
Stellar's Jay
Joined: Mar 10, 2007
Posts: 15131
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| Posted: Tue Apr 03, 2007 8:44 pm Post subject: |
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| Cernunnos wrote: |
If your partner or prospective partner is so shallow that they can't see beyond you fitting into the current trends then are they really worth dating anyway? |
I don't know about trends, but I do know that I want my lovers to be proud of how I look, as I would want to be of them. Is this shallow? I don't care - I also want the same feelings about emotional and intellectual ability as well. |
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Shale
Phoenix
Joined: Jan 15, 2007
Posts: 535
Location: New Zealand
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| Posted: Wed Apr 04, 2007 12:40 am Post subject: |
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Pah, the latest trends suck. Fashion down here at least makes young girls look old or pregnant. There's dressing within the realms of 'typical' (aka nothing really way out of the ordinary in a negative way) and being a fashion sheep - that is, wearing whatever they hand you down from the runway, or whatever big business says you should.
I'd rather be average than trendy, but that's just me.
There's little guidelines here and there of what fits within the bounds of 'average' or 'typical' styles of clothes...but you know what they say. Being truly fashionable persay involves actually breaking those rules every now and again. Doing something unusual to add to the average
In regards to what Calandale just said there...yeah, I'd like my lovers to be proud of how I look (omg look what I have guys! Drool all you want, she's MINE!), and I'd like my lovers to be something I'm proud of. Mine at the moment dresses like a 12-year-old...and I'm 20  It's actually embarrassing at times. He doesn't realise, I don't think, how amazingly AMAZING he looks in proper clothes. Hell, he even looks better in his uniform than he does in his usual clothes...he's had female customers hit on him before. He's a gorgeous guy...if only he knew this, and took more pride in his appearance...well. I'd be fighting girls off left right and centre!
It's realising your potential, I suppose, and taking advantage of it. |
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sepia
Deinonychus
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Joined: Jul 29, 2004
Age: 32
Posts: 327
Location: N.London
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| Posted: Wed Apr 04, 2007 5:23 pm Post subject: |
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| JonnyBGoode wrote: | I prefer suit and tie, or slacks and sportcoat. Prefer standard collars, I hate futzing around with the buttons on button-downs. (Also makes it insanely difficult to loosen/take off a tie.) I've never felt comfortable in t-shirts and shorts... but maybe that's because I've never felt comfortable with my arms and legs. Occasionally I'll throw in braces, and perhaps go all the way and wear a tux. Often (almost always, these days) wear a fedora. Partly because they're cool (my fedora gets more action than I do... sometimes I just send it out to the clubs and I stay home), and partly to hide my thinning hairline.
I guess I figure, if I'm gonna dress oddly, I might as well do it well...
I also like long coats. When I was younger, I used to wear a coat 24/7 (an aspie thing, I think...). Coats with lots of pockets... but then I lose things in the pockets and end up doing a Tom Baker impression going through them trying to find stuff. Sometimes will wear the coat just on my shoulders over whatever else I'm wearing... which has caused some less-observant people to accuse me of wearing capes. (I may have an affected clothing style, but not that affected... )
oh... and LMAO @ "diving into the thongs of teenage girls" |
ok, your dress sense soounds like fun to me. i'd say you probably have 'aspie chic' which is a bit like geek chic but a bit louder (i've decided).
i like the vintage clothes too. i like the smoothness and heaviness of the fabrics. the 40s & 50s cuts seem to fit and suit my shape the best and i enjoy the hunting and gathering of really good condition peices. The only upsetting bit is when a loved item crumbles through use. i like the swing era clothes and music too and l go to a few places where everyone wears this style.
do you have much of a swing scene near you? |
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