what's the use of socializing with neurotypicals?

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DoodleDoo
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29 Jan 2012, 12:26 am

First not all NT's are the same, many flavors. Some will be great, many so so and some well it just is not going to work no mater what you do.
NT's can help with the social skills and really just enjoyment of life.
If you hook up with the right NT's they can be a great asset, I mean you never going to get the social stuff down perfectly, you will always seem to miss things. Having a NT on your side in critical social situations can be a lifesaver.



kestrel
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29 Jan 2012, 1:11 am

Those folks are the only people I know. :? So... I get confusion, frustration, friendship - depending on the person. Sometimes all of the above at the same time. It's really hard to pigeonhole one thing, though.



perpetualconfusion
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29 Jan 2012, 1:59 am

What's the use? Kind of a necessary evil, don't you think? At work we say it's all "forced" socialization; as if we would never hang out together after hours or off-duty. Mostly true; but I have a few NT friends at work and a few from "back in the day".

I know that as Aspies, we generally can count our friends with the fingers on our hands. For myself, that would be closer to five or six in total . All NT's AFAIK :)

I try to learn and adapt as best I can (at least I have been for all these years; I just did not know it). NT's are a resource for me and can be for you as well.


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Jogeran
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19 Apr 2014, 3:12 pm

You shouldn't judge people just because there neurotypical, I'm sure there are some neurotypicals out there who you could get along with if you got to know. I personally think that not socializing with someone because of a minor detail about them would be a bit foolish, you never know what a person is like until you get to know them better.



Suhtek
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20 Apr 2014, 12:42 pm

Recently people in general have driven me to wonder why I should even talk to any of them.
My interests are math, learning Chinese and movies.

Most of the people I encounter have no interest in the first two, and if they say they like movies, they mean in a very general sense.
I was talking to a girl a couple of months ago about the movie Groundhog Day, and I stated some perhaps obscure facts about the movie,
and she teased me calling me "wikipedia."

But, when I talk to people who have a firm knowledge of math I find the conversations to be invigorating.
Which I will juxtapose my conversation with a layman about almost any thing: the first 30 seconds of the conversation they seem to be interested in what I am saying, this is followed by them feigning interest, and ultimately I realize that they could care less about what I'm saying.
* I'd like to clarify that I enjoy talking to people who have the same interests I do, and I enjoy talking to people who give me new insights. There are obviously many different types of people
who have the same passion for mathematics I do. Unfortunately they are few and far between.*



Last edited by Suhtek on 20 Apr 2014, 7:45 pm, edited 1 time in total.

kraftiekortie
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20 Apr 2014, 3:02 pm

I'm glad the majority knows that NTs comprise a "Spectrum," like we do.



alessi
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21 Apr 2014, 12:20 am

Heidi80 wrote:
When you sosialize with neurotypicals, what do you get out of it? I'm asking because frankly, I don't understand it. I myself have a tight-knit asperger support group and mainly socialize with other aspies from it


You are extremely lucky. Most people don't have that so they have to try to make social connections with whomever they can. Social support can be a matter of life or death.



Milanor
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21 Apr 2014, 11:41 am

This is a pretty broad question and there are many answers as others have pointed out. From my experiences and my knowledge, I would say that socializing with NT's are almost a must in order to get around with important things in life (job, education (if still in school), getting around in everyday life) and even though most of them might not end up being a "good friend" they are still good acquaintances, and Fnord is pretty much correct in his response.

As far as getting closer to other Aspies and those on the autism spectrum, there are pros and cons to this. I have another Aspie friend when I was in college (before he dropped out and transferred to a different college) and while there is some sort of social bonding to a level, there are drawbacks as well. While him and I both share similar interests and characteristics, sometimes we do get on each other's bad sides and often end up in resentment for a short time, and also trying to reciprocate friendliness. Sometimes, two loners might not make a good friendship due to the fact that if neither one is willing to open up then they both part ways in their own solitary lives. I could go on, but this is one of the experiences I had.