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vickygleitz
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22 Apr 2014, 9:51 am

I would love it if there were a stickied thread dedicated to pro-active opportunities and solutions for Autistics who want to be a part in making the world a safer, happier, easier,and all around better place for Autistic people. A thread with tons of ideas and brainstorming, but where "Meh, it could NEVER happen" is forbidden. A thread where, different ideas will be respected, but where, if you disagree with the HOW of someones idea, you can feel free to respectfully give your opinion on HOW you think it could work.

We are all different people with different ideas,priorities, etc. Some one having a different opinion than you does mean that you need to prove they are wrong,it simply means they have a different perspective. [ and with my black and white autistic thinking, that has taken many decades to learn]



Ann2011
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22 Apr 2014, 10:18 am

I would like to see people get over the whole eye contact thing. If I want to make eye contact, I will. And I do sometimes, just not all the time like some people do. I know people will be offended sometimes when you don't make eye contact, but my friends have gotten used to it and understand. They know that when I actually do look them in the eye I mean it; I'm not forcing myself.
Once in a session with my psychiatrist I was describing something that was taking me a lot to verbalize, so I looked away from her so I could focus on the words. When I looked back at her, she was leaning over in a slightly awkward position trying to meet my gaze - which I think was somewhere between the floor and the wall. I still don't understand why she did that.



Cornflake
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22 Apr 2014, 11:45 am

vickygleitz wrote:
I would love it if there were a stickied thread dedicated to pro-active opportunities and solutions for Autistics who want to be a part in making the world a safer, happier, easier,and all around better place for Autistic people.

So... start one. :wink:

Depending how it works out, it could be made sticky - but not in the General Autism Discussion forum: Alex retains sole control over the stickies in that forum and he is reluctant to allow more in there.

This forum should be Ok though, so have at it. :lol:


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walkthemoon
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06 May 2014, 6:03 pm

Ann2011 wrote:
I would like to see people get over the whole eye contact thing. If I want to make eye contact, I will. And I do sometimes, just not all the time like some people do. I know people will be offended sometimes when you don't make eye contact, but my friends have gotten used to it and understand. They know that when I actually do look them in the eye I mean it; I'm not forcing myself.
Once in a session with my psychiatrist I was describing something that was taking me a lot to verbalize, so I looked away from her so I could focus on the words. When I looked back at her, she was leaning over in a slightly awkward position trying to meet my gaze - which I think was somewhere between the floor and the wall. I still don't understand why she did that.


I have the same problem with my psychiatrist. Mine also tries to finish my sentences for me when I take a long time to answer them becasue I can't focus... My mom also does that too... I really don't get why the whole eye contact thing is that big of a deal.



Ann2011
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06 May 2014, 6:40 pm

I agree. I find eye contact intrusive.



o0iella
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08 May 2014, 5:29 pm

OP, great idea!

Ann2011, I totally agree with what you say. I also dislike eye contact and find it intrusive and uncomfortable most of the time. I personally find that if I am looking at the person, I am not taking in the words that they are saying, or the tone of voice in which it is said.

In Papua New Guinea, and other parts of Melanesia it's seen as rude and aggressive to make direct eye contact. I think it's the same case on the Indian subcontinent too.

When people on the spectrum don't make eye contact and dislike it, it's not a disability that needs to be eradicated or "cured", and it doesn't mean the character of that person can be called into question. It's just a difference, and a different way of communicating.

Not making eye contact is essentially harmless, and people who are offended or "uncomfortable" by this are no different from those who are offended or uncomfortable when they see two men holding hands, or a black person walking down the street.

If society was to tolerate certain aspects of our condition, then a great bulk of our problems would be lifted.